At your lowest low means that you can only go up from there, right? 😀 Do not depend on friends to help you care about your dream. Your dream is for you, not them. And already you are on the right path when you state that you want to ‘rectify your mistakes’. Pursuing a career in medicine to help others is highly honorable and noble and that alone should be enough to give you the strength needed.

But do not sulk over your current state. 😀 It is a test everyone undertakes. It is the test to help you find WHAT’S worth living for. It is the test that once you overcome you will learn to live in bliss. With that said my own answer to what’s worth living for may not answer yours because of the different experiences we’ve undergone. You have to keep digging and searching. Find what makes it worth living and give your all to it. However, I’m sure you’re curious as to what my answer is, or are, so I will gladly share it with you. 🙂 For me, it’s simply all of life. Sounds generic, right? However, break down every single aspect of it and you’ll find yourself with a near unlimited foray of beautiful glee and chaos. I wish to experience all of it or as much as I can anyway. That’s non-negotiable. Also, I believe in this world and humanity, in the good that is in each of us, and therefore dedicating my life to contributing in any way I can the good that I’ve learned from the many beautiful souls in the hopes to one day eradicate all negatives. Lol, that’s just a pipe dream as it’s a scientific and religious truth that negatives can’t exist without positives and vice versa. However, it doesn’t mean I can’t try. Simply, it means I’ve sided with good and will continue the good fight to maintain the balance.

Sorry if it’s not much insight. As I mentioned, you have to find your own reasons. But yes, do try. Trying is always the first step. Without trying, how will you know? How will you know if it’s worth living or worth pursuing medicine or worth saving lives or worth sharing your life or worth becoming a father or worth dedicating your life to something or worth making an overseas trip and so on and so forth. In any case, our lives are but a small fraction of time on this planet, a mere 70-90 years. Why not live it to the fullest? *Wink* Hopefully this helps. Oh, also, the bumps don’t stop. Ever. Life is a life-long learning experience (as it should be lol). Once you learn and accept this you’ll see every obstacle as a challenge to improve yourself so make sure you tackle em!

Best of luck to you my friend! Don’t give up yet!

Dear V,

Thanks for sharing your story. Please make it a habit to talk to people about your problems instead of internalize it. Having the possibility to say it out loud and get nurtured can take you a long way. Talking about your problems can be tough but right now you are experiencing the alternative – How does that make you feel?

If I was in your situation I would try to make a list of all the things in life I appreciate. Make a list of gratitude. Often times we are too busy telling ourselves what we are missing in our lives and forget to focus on the precious and lovely things we do have. I assume you can hear, see, run and talk? Most deaf, blind and handicapped people would almost die for those opportunities.

Make it a habit to read some positive and inspirational blogs every day. Give mine a read or find something you like. You will experience a lot of other people facing same troubles and challenges as you do today. You are the only one who decides the quality of your life. Determine that you are no longer going to drink, no longer going to be harsh on yourself and start developing healthy habits. I know it takes time and can be hard to do but look at the alternative my friend. You do not want to stay miserable like this.

If you would like me to assist you I would love to listen to your challenges and give you some guidance and opinions.

Best of luck,
Anders Hasselstrøm
http://www.andershasselstrom.com

The above posts are pretty awesome so I’m just going to add never give up. Keep on chugging along, find what makes you happy, and keep doing more of that.

V,

I was at my lowest point about a week ago. I felt like crawling into a dark cave and hiding from the world. What I realized was that I was already in a cave. I had isolated myself from my friends and family and I was constantly lying to myself about what I wanted vs what I needed. I created a reality that was not sustainable and put my feelings of self worth elsewhere – where it was not cared for – duh!. I found this forum and have read nearly every article. Now when I’m feeling down, I read the articles on the site or links from it that I’ve saved that inspire me. I made an appointment with a counselor (look for a good one who inspires you). I reached out to friends and family. I was honest with myself . . . finally. I forgave myself . . . finally. I can tell you that I am feeling so much better.

Congratulations to you for finding this forum too and for reaching out. Everyone deserves to be selfish. I encourage you to be selfish and love yourself more. Seek help and support from anywhere that you can. Love yourself.