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I do not know if I just want to be heard or need some feedback/advice

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  • #379066
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Kibou:

    “I have learned quite a lot about energy, empath, sensitivities in the last year from books, blogs, people, etc.”- interesting and telling, that you learned about energy, empathy and emotional sensitivities not primarily from people (or animals) who are alive with energy and emotion, but from non-living things: books and blogs. Although people wrote the books and blogs you read, you are not interacting with them.

    When you interact with another person in real-life/ in-person, in a meaningful way, you can experience the energy and emotion of two people: you and the person you are interacting with. But when you sit alone, reading a book (or writing a book, as you have done), you are experiencing only one person’s energy and emotion, and that person is you.

    About your epiphany following calling Cuba home, being surprised that it so happened that you referred to Cuba as home, being “near tears” at the thought and the emotion accompanying the thought, you wrote: “The reason, why this is so big, is because I used to say I am (emotionally) homeless.. But now, I actually can say ‘home’… I smile a lot.. I feel really peaceful at the moment.. Something big shifted again.. I am very content with the outcomes and state of mind I have taken on”-

    – On April 25, you wrote: “I deal with many things on my own mostly, especially my emotions”. Even an epiphany, a “Something big” kind of epiphany- you experience on your own, not in the context of a meaningful in-person interaction with another human.

    This home-epiphany gave you peace and contentment and that is a very good thing. Next step would be to experience peace and contentment in the context of a meaningful interaction with another person- not in a book or a blog or a forum such as this, but in real life, in-person.

    anita

    #379189
    Kibou
    Participant

    Dear Teak and Anita,

    Sorry for the late reply; although I am not quite sure what qualifies as a late reply and what does not. In adavance, I can say that when it comes to the replies received from tinybuddha, it can sometimes take me 1-2 days processing/reflecting time. Sometimes, I also simply cannot get straight to replying. Other than that, I will try to announce earlier that I’ll reply on a later day, as I have before.

    Also, I hope you both don’t mind the joined reply again. For me it seems that things overlap and can be adressed to both of you.

    The impression “that you were the person who always took care of other people’s needs, but perhaps they couldn’t take care of your needs properly” sums it up good.

    Yes I took care of my siblings, and I forgot or may not even have considered my own emotional needs at all. Also, the thought of people being there for me when I needed them is very rare, and only for specific instances. For example I would still do much of the work on my own or deal with much of my own emotions, and only asking for small favors whilst having backup plans prepared. It is habit I grew into given my experiences. I do not feel the need to share much of things that happened at the moment, but thanks for offering 🙂

    Some of these events I did share with friends, or with people that I met in a pilot study for a platform development focused on raising the collective awareness. I was both in a career and spirutality group. Each of them lasted 2 months, and had weekly group calls. So, I did continue to share and open up and get help/support, although at first I saw these people as “temporary” since they were all called in for a pilot study or test trial; there wasn’t much belief that we would stay in touch.

    Never the less we all shared vunerable stories and struggles we were facing. I was sharing often with a smile on my face and trying not to be too much of a burden. Back then I still felt somehow like a burden, but there were aha moments where these people showed me or got me to realize that we are holding an organic authentic conversation, despite sharing our struggles, or blindspots that we have.

    It is also through these groups that I met the theta healer. I met her in the pilot study and she offered me a healing session in September 2020. I did not get back to it, as my mental state was going down the slope at that time. Then when we met again this year in February, she said it was totaly fine, and said it is okay to come back when I feel ready. At the end of the test study, we both knew, we both were ready for that theta healing session; she just had begun her practice in August 2020 and still was filing on her skills. These people helped me along the way to ask for help, or better said, kept saying it is fine to ask for help or share something if I need a reflecting board. I did eventually in the process.

    From some of them it is that I learned things about HSPs, empaths and energy as well. So I did not only look at books and blogs. Since I did not share much of the human interaction that I had, I can see how it could be misunderstood that I am lacking “human interaction aha moments.” I did have those as well, but for some reason the biggest aha moments I have are after the interactions on my own, or random moments where I am usually also alone. I am probably just processing information.

    Also, I do think it might have taken me a while to see or grasp the form of support that comes along the way. Me being used to taking of other people’s needs and little of my own or receiving it, had to kind of first learn again what it is like to receive support. In fact this came up in the theta healing session; I know that there are people I can go to for support to, but I won’t allow to receive it. So I was setting myself up for self sabotaging throughout my life.

    However, I think I am doing a better job at asking for help. Last week I asked people which title name they would find more compelling and which image that creates in their head. I was surprised how many people replied, especially the speed at which they replied. I am aware that this sort of question is “lighter” in its nature. I do not think every one is open for “deep” conversations or discussing “heavy” or “sensitive” topics.

    The reason why I put these words in quotation marks, is because to me, I did not find many of these topics to be so heavy/deep/philosophical. Since I am used people being vunerbale towards me I’ve heard stories from loss of a parent, divorce, child loss, finacial struggles, the so called “dark” sides of people; altough I found them to be rather human these things. Maybe I was rationalizing again and empathisizing.

    Maybe that is just what we all fear – being considered good or bad. This does not exactly exist since it is a construction we have created in our mind that cease to to exist when we believe in them; as our actions and behaviours are judged in our own minds by our own set of morals. Before I rant on, what I want to convey, is that I think for many of us it is hard to talk about our emotions, needs and desires so it might be trickier for people to hold such conversations or listen to them.

    Yeah, people can also just be busy with their own lives and don’t feel the need to communicate that often. I had to let that sink in for me as well and acept it together with the life changes we are all going through. Some of the friends used to wonder why people no longer stay in touch, or kept saying they are looking forward to emails and messages, or wrote on the social pages how they are waiting for replies and guess that they have to be patient before a reply comes, so that confused me. It is like two contradictory statements. From what I heard/read it seems that many people prefer to stay in touch with people with who they share more face to face interactions. As a nomad, that is hard to keep up with but I can understand; after all I also prefer physical face to face interaction when possible.

    From one of these friends I hear kind of. It is a sporadious ghosting I would call it, but with what they have shared with me, I am guessing they are doing the best they can and impriving their own behaviours. (they told me that directly). What I found, to be an appropiate way of responding is sending less messages and when I do, they are more simple in nature.

    Also, I found myself expecting less replies from people. When I do receive them I am happy, but I keep in mind that I also do not have to be there at the instance for others and can look out for my own needs. I can openly share that I will get back to them later or a couple of days later. I no longer say “it is okay” when I do not think it was, but instead reply to other content of the message that both people can enjoy. That way I am not unconsciously teaching people it is okay to treat me like an option, but also that way the messages sound kinder or possible feelings/residue of guilt deminish; I used to feel a bit guilty when I would reply late, starting with a day late.

    I understand better now that when life is busy and people are under stress people are more forgetfull. Maybe they really did mean to be there for me anytime I call or message, although were hardly ever. And if I do have something urgent, I  do not mind sending out messages again or calling them without scheduling for a call after not having received any reply. Seems like a good way to cope with it, for me.

    TeaK, I think you are correct; I did have some of my needs met. It may not be to way I imagine, but I am staying connected somehow to people and bonding was there. I cannot deny that. And I think, I have more strong bonds shared with several people than I think I have. Not saying that these people were there for me, as I would have liked, or that I became best pals with most, but the moment(s) were strong/vunerable itself.

    I have a question. What are healthy ways to release emotions like anger, sadness, depression to avoid the the risk of rationalization. By now, I feel like I can call out my emotions. I do breathing exercises when I notice I am detecting anger, or I go for a walk. I dance it out, sometimes I write it out. I talk about things with my mum or sister. Are these all different ways, or is there more to it? I am asking out of curiosity.

    Kibou

     

    #379194
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Kibou;

    In regard to late replies, as far as I am concerned, there is no such thing as a late reply: whenever you reply is okay with me. In regard to addressing your posts to “TeaK and anita”- I prefer that you address me separately. First, I will read what you post to me and to other members no matter who you address your posts to, so I will  not miss any information that you provide (these are public forum, and the public, including myself,  is welcome to read everything here).

    Second, by you addressing me, I can see if and how you respond to what I individually suggested to you. Third, if you address one member by name, but you do not address me by name, I will understand that you are not interested in more of my input (you have the choice to reply to one member but not to another, or post a short thank-you to one and reply at length to another, according to your preference).

    Otherwise, regarding your most recent post, if you think it may be a good exercise for you, here is what I suggest: re-write the part of your recent post that you want to address to me (if you do) in a child-like language, that is, in a simple, direct, concrete language a ten year old (or younger) would use, best you can.

    anita

    #379226
    TeaK
    Participant

    Dear Kibou,

    it’s okay to respond whenever you feel like it, without feeling obliged. I do like it when people respond, but the relationships here are not the same as relationships with one’s friends and relatives, so no need to feel obliged. It’s okay to write only if you feel like expressing yourself and sharing.

    From what you’ve said, it appears one of your core wounds is your unmet emotional needs, and feeling that you’re a burden if you express those needs at all. You were there for others and didn’t expect, or didn’t dare to expect, that others would be there for you.

    When you comforted your mother when you were just 2 years old, the child doesn’t do it because they have developed empathy at that age, but primarily because they fear that their own existential needs won’t be met. If something happens to your mother, you as a small, helpless child wouldn’t be able to survive on your own. That’s why a child tries to do everything in their power to comfort the parent, to make the parent happy, so the parent could continue to take care of them. It’s a coping mechanism, a survival mechanism for the child. If you help your mother the best you can and don’t represent a burden to her, there’s a greater chance that she’d take care of you, and that your own survival would be ensured. That’s how the child’s mind works, unconsciously.

    So I believe you became an empath, i.e. attuned to other people’s needs, out of necessity. You too had needs but you suppressed them, basically to survive. When you got a little older and when the thinking brain started developing, you probably started rationalizing why those other people (your parents and siblings, later your friends) can’t really be there for you when you need them – because they are hurt people, you told yourself.

    This continued for many years, where you’ve tried to help various hurt people whom you met on your journey. You would involve in “deep conversations” with them and offered to be their shoulder to cry on. This was your way of bonding. You didn’t ask for much in return, just that they keep in touch. When they wouldn’t, when they would ghost you, that’s when you finally felt hurt and abandoned.

    I also understand now that some of those people might really be wounded (suffering from social anxiety, as you said), that’s why they would often ghost you. But also, many of your relationships seem to be long-distance, with people whom you didn’t spend much time with in the first place, since you do move a lot, so that’s also something to consider. It’s good that you’re now better able to set boundaries and not feel the pressure to reply immediately, but to honor your own needs and timing.

    It’s also great that during your group healing sessions in 2020, you could allow yourself to change the dynamic from always being a helper to asking for help yourself too. At first you were sharing your painful experiences with a smile on your face, not wanting to be a burden, but then the group members made you realize it’s okay to be needy. They encouraged you to ask for help. That’s a great progress.

    You said you’ve done most of your healing with the theta healing modality. I don’t know much about it, I’ve just checked it now a little, and it seems it works on uncovering one’s false beliefs. Does it work with emotions too, and how?

    When you do feel an emotion, it’s good that you can name it, but it might be good to also stay with it for a while, without immediately rationalizing it and trying to get rid of it. Try to see where it’s coming from and which need of yours hasn’t been met. Try not to immediately explain it away, telling yourself that yes, you’re hurt but the person who’s hurt you is hurt too. Because by doing the latter, you immediately overwrite your own pain with empathy for the other person, while your own pain and your own need remain unaddressed.

     

    #379228
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Kibou:

    I want to expand on my yesterdays’ suggestion that you rewrite to me like a ten year old (or younger) would write, in a simple, direct, concrete language:

    The title of your thread is: “I do not know if I just want to be heard or need some feedback/ advice”- what if you use your thread for the child in you to be heard?

    You started your original post April 17 with: “Hi, I have difficulties with the feelings of abandonment, which is getting bigger”- notice, you have difficulties with the feelings of abandonment, that is, your difficulties are not with abandonment on the intellectual/ rational level, but on the feeling/ emotional level.

    Let’s jump to your May 4 post. You wrote about your experience as a child: “I forgot or may not even have considered my own emotional needs”- that’s you, the intellectual, well-read, educated adult speaking with a vocabulary you picked up through the years of your later, second decade of life. How would a five year old, or a seven year old say what the adult-you expressed here? Maybe she would have said: I am sad and nobody cares that I am sad! with the corners of her mouth turned downward in anger.

    See the difference in language? The adult uses general terms (“emotional needs”), the child uses specific, concrete terms (sad); the adult forgot and is not sure (“I forgot or may not..), the child remembers and is sure. The adult considers, the child knows.

    Putting the exercise aside for a moment, I just noticed your anger while re-reading your recent post: “I was sharing often with a smile on my face and trying not to be too much of a burden”- I get the feeling that what’s behind the smile is anger: on one hand, you smile not wanting to be a burden, but on the other hand, you are angry for (allegedly) being a burden!

    As I imagine that smile on your face, I can see (in my mind’s eye) the anger in it, in the rigidity of the smile perhaps, in it being forced perhaps, or disciplined, not free and spontaneous

    Now back to your April 17 original post, regarding friends who kind-of ghosted you. One one hand, they told you the following: “They said I am their sparkle in their life that they needed, the most caring, loving & supportive friend they know… that.. they think I am thoughtful, fun to hang out with, and diligent…they all said they liked the memories and fun we had together. They all said I am cheerful or am supportive and caring”, but on the other hand: “It’s been 3 months now. That’s the longest I haven’t heard from them… why I am being ‘ghosted’ so often… The friend let me know .. I still hear from them from time to time, with the same ‘ghosting’ trend.. I also have been ‘ghosted’ by others”.

    Trying to understand this contradiction, you considered that their mental health issues may be the explanation, or Covid.. but what if it’s your anger that explains some of the ghosting: they see your smile and appreciate it, but they sense the rigidity in that smile, the anger underneath, contorting it, but they are not sure because your anger has not been verbalized or directly expressed.

    Back to my suggested exercise, talking/typing like a child in her first decade of life: talk about anger in a simple, direct, specific/ concrete language. It will help if you assume an angry face as you do this exercise (if you do), corners of your mouth turned down, eyebrows closer together, feeling tears almost, then talk, write, or type away.

    anita

    #379560
    Kibou
    Participant

    Dear Anita,

    Thanks for the two replies and I think I understand what you said in the first reply.

    I can not fully reply.

    It is true that I have anger in me.

    I am angry and I am sad right now.

    The more I thought about it, the more sadness I had, my anger increased as well.

    It is in my head, and it got bigger in my head.

    But I can not write down what I thought.

    I know that anger hurts people.

    I know that anger distances people.

    I remember how my mum cried when I was angry at her for not letting me play before completing my homework first in grade one.

    I remember how I felt bad for having hurt her. I was at first stubborn and isolated myself. Our family wanted me to apologize to my mum first before I go outside.

    It was unfair. I wanted to play and not do the homework first, I could have done it afterward. Why would I have to apologize to such non sense.

    But I also was sad and angry at myself for making my mum cry. The thought came up again.

    I apologized and cried when apologizing because I had hurt my mom.

    I am angry at the amount of lies that exist in the world.

    1. People want fairness but we are not fair. So many times have I been treated unfair because of being different; different skin color, different likes, different ideas, different background.

    2. People want authenticity but only to their liking.

    3. People say you should be yourself, but if you are yourself and it is not to people’s liking than that is a lie.

    4. People say they want kindness but are skeptical of it.

    5. There are so many things that contradict each other so there is no right or wrong, but people say something is right or wrong.

    6. Working is fun or full-filling, that is a lie. Most people I have met so far are sad or angry when they come back from work. There are two exceptions. I met one man once who was always happy. He was the first to notice my sadness in Cuba. When I was ready to talk to him I soon found out he died of cancer. He was a really happy man. I wish I could live life as happy and to it’s fullest as he did.

    I hate to admit it and but I am smart and people are jealous of smart people – that is unfair. I feel lonley for being smart.

    I feel lonely for being so open-minded and I am mad when people are not trying to be open-minded. At the same time we want to be accepted for who we are, that itself is kind of a lie or hypocrasy.

    What I am most sad and angry about is that I want someone to make me their first priority. But I would dislike myself if anyone were to lose themselves by putting me first before they do their own.  Yes the inner child is not fully wound.  And I know a child would not speak this way; there are words and expressions a child would not say, but it is as much I can do for now. I guess a child would say, “I am sad and angry because no one truly cares about me.”

    I just had to think of memory; when I was a teenager I asked my mom whether my mom only loves me because I am her child. If I had been swapped by birth, would she have not loved her swapped child as she did to me and if she did not know I was her true child she would not love me unconditionally? My mum went silent. But many people go silent when I question something that people probably do not want to think about. I am good at discussions, debates, presentations. I do not like being good at discussions or debates. I can get the audience to explode in laughter or to go silent. I prefer the former, but the latter has a lesson to be learned. I know the silence cannot be because my presentation was boring or bad since I get very good grades on it. A professor at uni once told me that she found my presentation amazing but I have to be careful how I address humanity’s role in such “difficult” topics. I was presenting about forest set on flames in Indonesia because of actions caused by humans. I knew she was right and could already get a hunch that she would say that when she said “but…” I recognize such silence in an instance.

    Sometimes it is silence created because I thoroughly looked at both sides of an argument. During my year abroad I took part at the northeast Asian student round table club because I wanted to improve my Japanese; the club activities were held in Japanese, but the conference was held in English. I was in the LGBTQ community; we were randomly selected into the communities. I was happy to be drawn into that one though because it was a topic that it is more positive and friendly to discuss at an international university and the more international community – people mostly say they are pro LGBTQ rights in North-East Asia (even if that is not truly the case; they do not want to stick out from what the mainstream say though). The other topics had a higher risk of causing heated discussions. Environment protection and something about security and America’s role in security for northeast Asian countries. The last topic I found boring to research; cultural preservation. I am getting off-topic. But it calmed me down ranting about other topics.

    This time, I did not spell-check. I am tired and my eyes are slightly burning, but I want to add the rest of the reply.

    These friends did not see my face, apart from the videos/pictures I have sent them. They loved my smile. People called out on my radiant smile. In the groups that I was in for the platform development, at first, my smile was not radiant, but they did not say, they said they sensed sadness and depression. As the groups continued they would say my smile getting more radiant and at the end said I showed the biggest cheer up and commitment. In other workshops, the person offering the workshop said he loved my smile and that I am so bright, then again I did these workshops in March/April. When I walk on the streets and I send people a smile on the street they smile back. It feels genuine, so I would have a hard time believing my smile gives away hidden anger, and to be honest, I took a picture of me smiling. When I look at it, I have to smile too.  If anything, then my anger probably shows through my writing, as you saw it, Anita. Does that make sense?

    I hope I did not hurt anyone. Thanks for allowing me to express myself, even if it is not always direct. I will try again at the writing like a child another time. I do think, it is a good exercise.

    Kibou

    #379561
    Kibou
    Participant

    Dear TeaK,

    Thanks for the reply, but I am going to reply another day. I cannot say for sure, as I have a deadline to catch up on.

    Kibou

    #379564
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Kibou:

    Good that you posted again. I will read and reply when I am back to your thread in about 12 hours from now.

    anita

    #379611
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Kibou:

    The first part of your recent post is the exercise:

    “I know that anger hurts people. I know that anger distances people. I remember how my mum cried when I was angry at her for not letting me play before completing my homework first in grade one. I remember how I felt bad for having hurt her. I was at first stubborn and isolated myself. Our family wanted me to apologize to my mum first before I go outside. It was unfair. I wanted to play and not do  the homework first, I could have done it afterward. Why would I have to apologize to such non sense. But I also was sad and angry at myself for making my mum cry. I apologized and cried when apologizing because I had hurt my mom”-

    – the little first grade girl that you were, was filled with intense, youthful anticipation of joy, with the desire to play, filled with passion. That passion was who she was at the time, it was her essence.

    But alas, her essence did not only inconvenience her mother, it hurt her mother and made her cry! Her family wanted the little girl to apologize to her mother, which meant, to agree that indeed, being who she was, her very essence, was wrong and requires an apology.

    At first, the little girl refused to agree with such a devastating conclusion, and she stubbornly isolated herself from them. But not for long, because she was a little girl who needed family, so she gave in and gave up and abandoned herself.

    You started this thread on April 17 with: “Hi, I have difficulties with the feelings of abandonment”. The example you gave today described one incident of abandonment, but there were many more times when the same message was repeated: who you are is Wrong and is not welcome!

    In the second part of your post, you returned to generalities: “1. People want fairness but we are not fair”- your mother/ family were not fair to you when they insisted that you abandon yourself. “2. People want authenticity but only to their liking”- again, you generalize your mother and family into “People”,  “5. There are so many things that contradict each other”- perhaps your mother told you that she loved you while demanding that you abandon yourself, a contradiction.

    “What I am most sad and angry about is that I want someone to make me their first priority”- when your family insisted that you abandon yourself, they made you their last priority. Understandably, you want to be someone’s first priority!

    “But I would dislike myself if anyone were to lose themselves by putting me first”- you would dislike it if someone else was to abandon themselves so to put you first because you know how if feels: you abandoned yourself so to put your mother/ family first, and you paid a heavy price for it.

    “when I was a teenager I asked my mom whether my mom only loves me because I am her child. If I had been swapped by birth, would she have not loved her swapped child…”-

    This tells me that indeed, your mother told you that she loves you, and that you suspected that she didn’t, because of the glaring contradiction: if she loved you, why did she emotionally abandon you, insisting that you follow suit?

    “These friends.. loved my smile. People called out on my radiant smile”- your abandoned self has not been completely abandoned, she still radiates life from time to time.

    Back to your original post of April 17: “The wound of abandonment has not been fully healed and it might never will.. I know that I will always have my family, so that alone makes me feel that I’ve healed certain aspects of that wound”-

    – when your family insisted that you abandon yourself emotionally, you paid a heavy price for the (not really) love that they offered you. As long as they are exacting this price and you keep paying it, the wound of abandonment can not heal.

    It was mind boggling to me when I finally thoroughly understood that my mother did not love me even though she said many times that she did, and even though she meant it at times, and even though she cooked for me, etc. I figured it out when I understood that a person who loves another does not abandon or destroy the supposed loved-one, and then “loves” the shell that remains, or the appearance that remains after the essence of the person is evicted or destroyed.

    anita

    #379653
    TeaK
    Participant

    Dear Kibou,

    I remember how my mum cried when I was angry at her for not letting me play before completing my homework first in grade one.

    I remember how I felt bad for having hurt her. I was at first stubborn and isolated myself. Our family wanted me to apologize to my mum first before I go outside.

    Parents can cry in front of their children as means of manipulation, or because they aren’t emotionally mature enough, so when you were angry and didn’t want to do obey, she felt it like rejection and started crying. It appears your mother wasn’t manipulating you consciously, but rather, she was emotionally immature and reacted like a child. And then you were made guilty for “making your mommy cry”, and even needed to apologize.

    Your entire family (I assume your father and other adults, perhaps your grandparents?) concluded the same: that you’re guilty and needed to apologize. There was nobody who understood how an adult should behave – all of them were emotionally immature. You grew up in such a family, where you were required to suppress your needs to please your mother (and other family members). And you were emotionally blackmailed: if you don’t behave, you’ll make your mother miserable, perhaps you’ll even make her sick?

    I know that anger hurts people. I know that anger distances people.

    You’ve learned that if you’re angry, you’ll hurt your mother and she’ll distance herself from you. Other family members will distance themselves too. Therefore, you mustn’t be angry. What’s more, you need to have compassion for your mother. When your mother got sick, I guess you needed to be super compassionate and bury your anger even deeper, even though you were breaking down due to the pressure of taking care for your siblings.

    I agree with Anita that those generalized statements about “people” (1-6) most probably refer to your mother and the rest of your family.

    I hate to admit it and but I am smart and people are jealous of smart people – that is unfair. I feel lonley for being smart.

    Was someone in your family (e.g. your siblings) jealous of you being smart?

    I guess a child would say, “I am sad and angry because no one truly cares about me.”

    Good that you could express it loud and clear! You’re sad and angry and you have the right to be sad and angry. You were deprived of that when you were a child. Now you can allow your inner child to be sad and angry! It’s totally justified. It doesn’t mean you should start yelling at your mother and other family members, being angry at them, but you can allow yourself to feel those feelings privately, and not feel bad about yourself for feeling them.

    A professor at uni once told me that she found my presentation amazing but I have to be careful how I address humanity’s role in such “difficult” topics. I was presenting about forest set on flames in Indonesia because of actions caused by humans.

    Perhaps your anger comes out in those presentations, when you talk about issues that you deeply care about, such as environmental protection? You leave people speechless, which is good to a certain point, because it make them stop and think.  But you maybe also make them feel guilty, as if they were personally responsible for causing those forest fires. Perhaps that’s what makes people uncomfortable. When you talk about “people” in those presentations, e.g. people who don’t care about the environment, you may be in part talking about your family who doesn’t care about you, and you’re angry and upset at them. And it shows in your presentations…

    Does this sound like a possibility to you?

     

    #379666
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Kibou:

    I am concerned that because of the sensitive nature of the exercise which you did in your most recent post, (and considering doing again),  that communicating with two replying members at the same time, especially when receiving long posts from each, may be too much work for you, overwhelming and/ or distracting. Is this the case?

    anita

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