Hi Amy,

I understand because I have failed hard even though I am smart, too.*

I recall getting an E on an English paper in 9th grade. I never did that poorly before. By my freshman college year, I started the first semester at the 200-level in English.

Then, I flunked out of a masters program. Years later, I did it at another school, getting a 3.80 GPA.

I learned how to study effectively and efficiently when I did the one-year masters program while working full-time.

We masters students collaborated a Lot. Are you working with some study buddies?

I thrived in my masters because I was 100% engaged. Are you?

For a test, we students divided up the reading to make summary notes. Then we shared them to make a complete study guide. Then we met with buckets of coffee at a coffee shop to walk through and discuss our notes. Then, we each studied on our own. I would read each page until I was comfortable. I would go back to original references plus some web searches to see what others say. Starting with a to-do pile leading to a done pile, I would review it all before bed – a psychologist suggested this and he had a PhD so… – and just before taking the test. A similar level of effort on papers, except much more independent work. Are you doing this?

The point is, we all fail and we can all can. You just have to try new approaches. Go for it!

Big blue

*humble brag 🙂

• This reply was modified 9 years, 10 months ago by Big blue.
• This reply was modified 9 years, 10 months ago by Big blue.

What a nice humble brag. I learn new words from u each time he he

He haw he haw Big blue 😉 so good to see that our lives are worth he hawing about lololol…will be on the floor soon he haw he hawwwwwwwwww

Hello Amy @amykesta

Thanks for your query.

I will share what I do.

Everyone is on their own journey. We come alone and we go alone. Even our siblings or loved ones have their own paths to follow, which means, no one is same. We are all as unique as it gets. So where is the competition ?

Competition between people has been created by the society to bring about better performance, however, with time, we have lost the meaning of real competition and have become slaves to comparisons. We want to be better than the Smiths next door. But do we really ?

Real competition can only occur with self. I stretch myself every day to become better than what I was yesterday and guess what, I do get better. I am so much healthier, happier and more peaceful than I was 10 years ago. If I had followed my friends or classmates who were constantly climbing ladders of success while I was experimenting and failing, I would have become more rich but would not have found myself.

I am so glad that I did not follow anyone or came under the pressure to follow others. My life is my life to live and I am gonna live it my way whether it consists of failures or success. Who determines success ?

But I do believe in hard work, determination and learning from each experience. I learnt early on that in each failure, there is a hidden seed of success so I go looking for it nowadays but am not too hard on myself though as there is no hurry in life. I have my own gifts and others have their own. Why compare ? When nature doesn’t discriminate, why should we ? People who fail still get equal sunshine, rain, wind etc as someone who succeeds LOL.

We are all very special and unique. Let’s keep it that way. Don’t let yourself down with comparisons.

Hope this helps.

Jasmine