Hello Crystalminds,

I have friends who are 15-20 minutes away, have smartphones that are perfectly capable of sending text messages/phone calls and yet I’m lucky if I see them once a month! Now, it’s not that they don’t care about me, etc. it’s just this day in age and the culture we live in people are increasingly more exhausted/less motivated to reach out (especially if you’re past the college/new graduate age). I doubt it’s personal. They may be making assumptions that you and your sweetie don’t want to make the drive or want to enjoy the first months together in your new place.

So try reaching out to them and say (word this carefully so it doesn’t come off as needy or an attack), “I miss you guys. I know I’ve been busy, but the next time you all plan a get together, let me know! [Boyfriend’s Name] and I would love to come.” Or invite them over to your new place!

If they’re vague or don’t follow through, well, then accept the fact you are not a priority for them *right now*. Give them space, and if they don’t reach out, well then, maybe Inky is right and you’ve been phased out (again, either out of laziness or, perhaps, out of intention).

As lovely as it would be to hold onto friendships, the romantic notion of “best friends forever” is not always a reality. Circumstances and relationships change. As the saying goes, “people come into your life for reason, a season, or a lifetime.” Treasure the time you *did* have with these people, leave the door open for them to return if you wish, and move on.