Hey again, Starlight1 🌟

The “overly critical, abusive” God of the old testament is a depiction of God in the image of man (or woman) in authority, like a parent.

My goodness, as I read your mention of anger 😠= failing at righteousness, I connected it to what I wrote to you a little while ago in your first thread, and the connection to intrusive thinking.

Anger is way more than a natural emotion (which it is, natural and healthy in itself) when connecting it to morality.

What is your relationship to anger?

If this speaks to you, I’ll be happy to explore anger (and other emotions) with you.

🙂😠☺️😞😡🤪 Anita

Hi Starlight1:

It’s okay to still get angry. It doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you or that you didn’t heal enough. Seems to me like you’re on the right track. Things take time to heal.

When you’re not allowed to express anger in any way.. what happens to the unexpressed, suppressed anger- it naturally grows!

And going through incredibly difficult situations without support is.. in credibly difficult. Without support everything feels heavier.

I’m glad to read that things improved for you mentally!

It is difficult to learn to be assertive and set boundaries when you weren’t taught those things. Isn’t it?

Anita

Hi again Starlight 🌟

What you wrote makes a lot of sense. Boundaries and assertiveness are skills that take time and practice, especially when you didn’t grow up with people who respected your limits. Sometimes the healthiest boundary really is stepping back from certain people, even if that’s difficult.

I also understand what you mean about reading other people’s stories. When there’s been trauma, the mind naturally compares everything to our own experiences, and sometimes the lines can blur. It happens for a very simple, very human reason: the brain uses your own past to make sense of anything new.

When you’ve been hurt before, your brain learns to scan new situations for anything that feels similar to the old danger. It’s trying to protect you. So, when you read a story, hear someone else’s experience, or take in a spiritual teaching, your mind immediately checks (even without actually thinking these thoughts): “Is this like what happened to me?” “Is this safe or unsafe?” “Does this remind me of something I’ve lived through?”

Because trauma memories are stored in a very emotional, sensory way — not in neat, logical files — the brain can mix the new story with the old one. That’s why the lines blur.

This is why trauma‑aware teaching matters so much. People with trauma need context, clarity, and gentleness, because their brains are working overtime to protect them.

Without enough context or sensitivity, spiritual or religious teachings can easily get mixed with old wounds, and that can feel confusing or even harmful.

What you’re noticing is insightful. You’re seeing how your history affects the way you interpret things, and why trauma‑aware teaching is so important. I’m glad our conversation is helping you think about spiritual trauma more clearly. You’re making thoughtful connections, and that kind of awareness is a big part of healing.

If you want to explore this more, I’m here, in this thread and in the other 🙂

Anita

Hi Starlight 🌟 ✨️ ⭐️

About limits: mine, growing up, were crossed so severely and so early that I was clueless 🙈 for the longest time about what my limits were or should be.

In our communication, please exercise your right to set limits and be assertive 💪

🙂 Anita

Still morning, Starlight ✨

I was wondering if I should reply to your 3rd thread here for 2 reasons: (1) to not spread or our 1 to 1 communication over too many threads, and (2) other responders (sadly I’m the only one responding for quite some time) may not want to intrude on our 1-to-1 conversation. If I leave your 3rd (and maybe 4th, etc.) thread unanswered, maybe someone else will answer it.

What do you think, Starlight? I would like to respond to your 3rd thread here or there, whatever you choose. Just let me know 🙂