April 13, 2015 at 11:33 am #75254CrystalParticipant
This is probably just me venting and I apologize for being an annoyance but I just need advice on how to handle my high levels of stress. I get anxious and stress for probably little reasons.
I want to be able to emotionally handle these things but at times it just gets too much and I go crazy. I’ve been meditating but I didn’t yesterday or today , so I’m not sure if it’d help or not but I’m sure it would.
Im 20 and unemployed, I went through a veterinary certificate class to find a job only to get rejected by many that I’ve applied for..
I cried my first interview. I now started to apply for normal jobs in shopping centers and grocery stores, and I called a few today but they’re not in the process of calling people back yet.
I do not know what to study if and when I go to college and I do not want to have major that I end up being disappointed in and hate and basically going to school just to make my parents happy …
I wanted to go to a beauty school two towns over but I’m just not able to because transportation is an issue and I do need a job as well, and because it’s far time management would be terrible if I were to take a bus.
Nothing else interests me at all except for beauty, and most likely meditation. I tried taking classes in music and ended up dropping the class because I just wasn’t loving it.
My mother keeps on trying to make me go to college and major in something she totally randomly suggested that I do not want to do. She always keeps pressing the same major on me that I told her many times would make me miserable.
I tell her I don’t want to waste my life being sad , I want to do something I love to do but I dont even know that yet or have the money to do anything.
I grow up mostly on the poor side because my mother made some bad financial decisions. I don’t want to say I had a rough life but things were not happy. My parents fight a lot as well and my dad treats me kind of like a private in the military since he was in the marines. He’s very loud as well so I don’t get much sleep or peace of mind to relax and not stress. All he does is yell all day about other people and he repeats his life on a loop and his issues and how much people are stupid and being broke, and its maximum volume at my ear all the time. I can’t get a moment of peace ever. Its not my issues but I’m really just exhausted listening to this and it stresses me out. I don’t want to be my parents ever.
my parents and family put a lot of pressure on me without helping me or anything. I don’t even have my license yet. I’ve always had to help myself. I’m pretty sure I had social anxiety and it’s pretty bad. I’ve had to fight these anxieties in public and I’ve been trying so hard to be more confident.
I just can’t take living with my parents anymore an being unhappy, i’m just sad all the time I can’t take their stresses over me and mine as well. I just hope I find a job soon.. It seems like the only way out is money , which sucks to depend on. I can depend on myself if I look at it in such a way, but I’m just so emotionally exhausted from this life I don’t know how much I can take it and I probably say this week after week since I was 16.
and just to add things on top.. I have this app on my phone that I try to earn money on just to get a couple of bucks to feed myself or even go do something to treat myself , but it recently rejected one of my “veggie” photo’s that I did submit but it wasn’t acceptable for tiny reasons. and now they’re going to take out 15$ resulting in an overdraft fee in my bank account because I don’t even have money in it.
I contacted both the website and the bank. I really hope something can work out. I’m having a total emotional breakdown panic attack.April 24, 2015 at 12:19 am #75752Lori DescheneKeymaster
I know this post is a week old, but I just saw it and felt compelled to respond. I’m so sorry to hear about what you’re going through. It seems like a lot to deal with all at once, looking for a job, trying to find what interests you, and dealing with pressure from your parents. I can understand why you feel stressed!
Have you ever tried yoga before? Most studios do some type of work-trade, allowing you to take classes for free if you do a shift behind the desk. I did this at the lowest point in my life, when I felt lost and didn’t have much money. It was life-changing for me, because it helped me manage my overwhelming stress, provided me with a sense of community, and also helped me figure out what I wanted to do with my life (a consequence of much clearer thinking!)
Meditation is certainly helpful, but if you’re doing it by yourself, it’s not always easy to be consistent. It’s easier to make mindfulness a habit when your practice involves other people.
Regarding your living situation, could you stay with a relative for a while? It sounds like your home environment is pretty unhealthy. I imagine it would be tough to change that without a job–but if you could stay with a friend or family member, even just a few days a week, that would give you some space away from that drama.
I know this may all seem overwhelming right now, but please know it won’t always be like this. You’re just starting your adult life, and it takes time to figure things out, but you will in time. Try to be gentle with yourself and trust that if you keep exploring your options, you will eventually find work you enjoy, and things will start coming together.
You are in my thoughts!