Home→Forums→Relationships→Losing best friend who is pregnant
- This topic has 80 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 5 years, 5 months ago by Maddie.
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July 15, 2019 at 6:41 am #303327AnonymousGuest
Dear Maddie:
Being outdoor is a wonderful thing, back from my car camping trip in the woods, the silence, the sounds of the forest, the stillness, the relaxing to nothing-is-happening is very nice. Kayaking reads exciting. Post anytime, Maddie, good to read from you.
anita
July 18, 2019 at 2:01 pm #303833MaddieParticipantDear Anita :
Sorry it has been some days since i posted. Well work has been crazy hectic. Lots of stuff are happening – some are good some are not so good but all of them are keeping me very very busy. So i have completely buried myself in work. There is lot of office politics happening too so im just trying to my image clean and been focusing on my work.
At home i spend time with my 5 yo nephew and i do gyming and remaining free time i spend with mom dad. Since i work US hours, i get quite good time during the day to spend with them. And kids are surely one of best way to distract the mind and gyming helps in keeping that negative energy at bay.
Strange thing though – my friend’s husband texted me the other day telling me about her delivering baby girl. Not wanting to sound rude, i simply replied Congrats and thats all. For that moment my mind did go back to all that and i did think that why he texted me randomly out of the blue and that too aftr full 6 days of her actual delivery. but i quickly distracted myself and focused back on work.
Anyways, wanted to let you know im allowing myself time to heal..Picked up Violin classes too..(wanted to learn Piano though but it is way too expensive and Guitars are clichè now 😉 )..So the process of Moving on is under progress :–d
How things have been at your end?
July 18, 2019 at 2:47 pm #303841AnonymousGuestDear Maddie:
I am glad to read your positive update !
How strange that he texted you, I am surprised and I don’t understand his motivation, and what brought that about. Regardless, I think you did the right thing to reply with Congrats and that is all. You wrote that there is a lot of office politics and that you intend to keep your image at work clean- this is wise of you because I know of people who lost their jobs because of office politics and nothing other than office politics. So yes, do keep your image clean. I think that it can only hurt you if you don’t remain distant and uninvolved with your former friend and her husband, keeping your relationship with her- when she returns to work- strictly professional and nothing more.
anita
July 19, 2019 at 12:51 am #303911MaddieParticipantDear Anita :
Yup..but i have a feeling it wasnt him texting. I have a feeling it was Her trying to get in touch..Since she has blocked me everywhere and im sure she wil be missing me too. Cz i never recieved any response of My Congrats..Normally you would say Thank You but nope no response at all and i was like Wow..Impolite much??!!! hahaha
Anyways i now have a bigger problem to deal with. One of my employee wants to leave due to health issues and instead of talking to me she went directly to HR. Her resignation has been accepted though bt she dsnt want to serve the 60 days notice period. So here comes emotional blackmail – She is texting me sad stuff at freaking 5 in morning..!! I told her exception in notice period is HR outlook so you talk to them as i cant do anything here. Then this girl same day at 3 in night keeps a status that reads- “Its a life and death situation for me. Maybe i will be no more after some days and ppl behind this will Pay..!! ”
I was like wtf, are you really threatening me..!!So i reported all this to HR and submitted a copy of all texts she sent me. I told them that if this girl takes any wrong decision, i should Not be held responsible as i have no control over your policies and your decisions.
So we have a meeting today with my VP abt how to deal with this girl.
This girl is junior and have just started her career..And i was like why the F you are after spoiling my name and career.? You wana leave, leave. No one is stopping you but sending sad/emotional texts to ur manager at freaking 5 in morning and keeping threatening statuses is way too much now.
Good thing though is my brother is a big shot in same company as me.I took him in confidence and told him about all this. He assured me he will protect me in case all this comes on Me
So yeah talk about office politics…lololol 😉
July 19, 2019 at 9:57 am #303955AnonymousGuestDear Maddie:
Reads like you did all the right things in regard to the junior employee. Employees should be briefed perhaps, at the beginning of their employment, or get a booklet with professional-rules-of-conduct, such as not texting or calling co workers or managers before a certain hour in the morning or after a certain hour in the evening, as well as what issues to take to the manager and what issues to take to HR.
Which brings me to the original topic, the “best friend who is pregnant” and now with child- strictly professional and nothing more.
anita
July 19, 2019 at 10:28 am #303975MaddieParticipantDear Anita :
Employees are briefed but here people specially girls believe in too much melodrama. Kinda like attention seeking tactic. Anyways we have found loop holes in her story as she has told HR a different story. HR is pissed as she has been bluffing on their name. So monday HR is gonna meet her amd set things straight.
As for the former friend? I do agree lines were blurred there and we never saw each other as Manager/Junior. Well im not gonna dwell much on that cause whats happened, happened. Me and her both are at fault.
But yeah, when (if) she comes back, strictly professional with her and that too wont be an issue as we both are in different teams. And more over i have the project to focus on as i do want that next level for myself atleast by Feb 2020 🙂
July 19, 2019 at 10:36 am #303979AnonymousGuestDear Maddie:
Reads like you have nothing to worry about regarding the junior employee and hat HR will set her straight. I hope so, anyway. Steer clear of all that workplace drama and your advancement at work will be so much quicker and easier than otherwise.
anita
July 19, 2019 at 1:08 pm #304015MaddieParticipantDear Anita :
Yup…i personally hate all the drama. So whenever someone plays this game, i make my work so strong and good that high mgt cant find any fault in me. And im fiercely protective of my goodwill at work. So i dont take anyone threatening it lightly. Now i dont resort to dramatic/cheap attention seeking tactics but I work so good then, that everyone has to accept that Im a better employee.
Game is a bit different as this is first time im playing role of People’s manager but im learning evryday and using those lessons to become a good manager and a leader 🙂
July 19, 2019 at 1:37 pm #304021AnonymousGuestDear Maddie:
“a good manager and leader” reads good to me!
anita
July 20, 2019 at 9:37 am #304105MaddieParticipantDear Anita :
So weird thing – my friend’s husband sends me request on fb. I didnt accept it though. I then logged in to my instagram.(which is my new acc) There i see he blocked me but my friend hasnt..!!!
July 20, 2019 at 9:41 am #304107AnonymousGuestDear Maddie:
Weird and suspicious to me, I don’t see anything good coming out of you responding to any message or request from either your former friend or her husband, any one of them or both.
anita
July 20, 2019 at 9:50 am #304109MaddieParticipantDear Anita :
Yup…thats why i didnt accept his request. Although this is beyond my understanding that why block me on one and send me request on another? Also my friend still hasnt blocked. This is getting super weird now and i really dont know whats going on..!!!
July 20, 2019 at 11:05 am #304133AnonymousGuestDear Maddie:
Let this “super weird” remain as it is, don’t ask any of them for an explanation, keep your image in the office clear of any wrongdoing by steering away from any preventable trouble.
I will be away from the computer soon, and back in about 18 hours from now.
anita
July 20, 2019 at 11:08 am #304135MaddieParticipantDear Anita ;
Yup…i ignored his request and blocked him instead. Sure..Its almost mid night in India and im gonna dose off soon. you have a good rest of the weekend 🙂
July 20, 2019 at 11:49 am #304141MaddieParticipantDear Anita :
Yup…i ignored his request and blocked him instead. Sure..Its almost mid night in India and im gonna dose off soon. you have a good rest of the weekend
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