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Need Input About Volunteering / Doing Charity Work?

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Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)
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  • #53904
    Allison
    Participant

    I currently live and work in a foreign country. I love dogs, have always been. I really wish I could keep one but for the time being I can’t so two years ago I started sponsoring this dog from a local animal shelter. I’d pay a certain amount of money to the shelter each month and every weekend I’d visit the dog, take him for a walk, feed him, bathe him, etc.

    From the first visit, it was not what I’d expected it would be (in a somewhat negative way). The shelter is very big (it houses 600+ animals), it is privately owned and very disorganized. We weren’t briefed on the shelter’s rules and regulations (if there’s even any) and from my observations, I think in the end people generally let themselves in and just do whatever they want with the animals there. The system is entirely based on trust.

    The atmosphere is cold and unwelcoming. The woman who owns and runs the shelter constantly smokes and complains every time I meet her. The people there don’t seem to bother getting to know each other, they all seem jaded, it’s like a chore to them, no passion. For the record, I know taking care of the shelter is a huge work and responsibility but they are giving off all the wrong vibes to potential volunteers by acting the way they do.

    I hung on for as long as I could but I just can’t help but feel like I’m a nuisance when I’m there. I haven’t been visiting for over a year now, resorting to transferring monthly donation instead. I’ve never admitted this to anyone but I lost my interest because I got yelled at for bathing one of the dogs.

    This couple just yelled at us and told us how we were bathing the dog wrong, all while they were smoking all over the place around the animals. Nobody likes to be judged. I don’t like people smoking around the animals and I could also fault them for that but what good would that do? It pains me to admit that how I’m feeling is more important than caring for the dogs there but in the end that what keeps me from visiting again. I feel like I’m so selfish but at the same time I want to protect my heart and sanity.

    These lately, I’ve been thinking of stopping the donation altogether. I think everyone wants to be involved in their charity work, not just in the form of mindless monetary contribution. Am I overreacting? Am I approaching this right? I think the animals are the one who’ll suffer and it’s just unfair to them but if I keep doing this, I feel like I’m heading down the same path of jadedness as those people I met in the shelter.

    #53925
    @Jasmine-3
    Participant

    Hi Allison

    So good to hear that you love dogs too. My fur kids changed the definition of love when they came into our lives 7 years ago. The unconditional love, their cheekiness and resilience always helps to get me out of the most awful moods anytime. One of them has completely stolen my heart – he sits next to me while I do my reports at odd hours etc and never complains about the lack of courtesy that I show. He is at the door wagging his tail with a bouncy smile when I come back from anywhere, be it at 2 am or 4 pm. And when we sit down to meditate each evening, they join us without making any noise and become part of the whole process. This is the animal spirit. They will love you regardless of how you treat them back.

    Charity is very much like that. If you harbour negativity towards the charity that you wish to engage in for whatever reasons, it defeats the purpose of being selfless. If you do not wish to go to the pound or dog shelter as it doesnt suit your value system, then dont. If you dont want to donate cash, dont. But pls dont reason out your actions or blame yourself for being selfish.

    Whatever you want to do – charity work or donations etc – do it with unconditional love and acceptance. Do it with selflessness and no expectations as it will help you to feel good and content.

    Pls keep the conflicts away. Selflessness and conflicts do not go hand in hand.

    May you also find a dog, who will change the meaning of love and charity for you. Lots of woof woof…..

    J

    • This reply was modified 9 years, 12 months ago by @Jasmine-3.
    #53935
    ALN
    Participant

    It sounds like you are volunteering for a city shelter? I’m not sure how it works in countries outside the US. I currently volunteer for an animal society whose goal is to make our city no-kill, which basically means no more euthanization for any companion animal. We take in animals from the city shelters, house them in our center and try to find them forever homes. The staff and volunteers are great. They show so much love and care for all the animals. My time working with them has been amazing. Do they have anything similar to this where you live?

    #53986
    Allison
    Participant

    Hi Jasmine, yes I love, love dogs. Can’t imagine life without them. Alas, it is the kind of life I’m living right now.

    I think I’m innately a dog person but this trait was aggravated by traumatic childhood experience. My parents don’t share the same appreciation and they only keep them for the purpose of guarding the house. They would always get mongrels (they’re free or cheap) and when they’re deemed to be difficult / have outgrown their purpose, my parents would abandon them on the street without checking in with me and my siblings first. The last time they abandoned our dog it was because he was scratching my dad’s precious new car (dogs get excited, for example when you come home they’d stand on their hind legs to greet you but they can’t always maintain their balance and would end up leaning on something, in this case, it was my dad’s car and they’d accidentally scratch on it). So, off he went to the street.

    This happened so many times that I think it was the overwhelming guilt that drove me towards rescue dogs. It will always be rescue dogs for me. (Don’t get me wrong, I think I’d still love dogs had those things not happened to me but the intensity of my passion would’ve been different).

    I totally agree with you, the loyalty dogs have towards their master is mind-boggling regardless how they treat them. My sister adopted a dog when I was already out of the country, he’s a Dalmatian-mongrel mix. He was later also abandoned on the street by my parents but somehow found his way back. Never once has he exhibited resentment and anger towards my parents. He’s so sweet and oblivious, just happy to be reunited with his masters.

    I’m so glad to read about how happy you are with your dogs, I know the feeling. I, too consider them my ‘kids’. And I know how smart they can be. I once had a mongrel. One day I went to a nearby convenient store and he followed me. I was worried he’d follow me into the store or start barking on / attacking people but to my surprise he didn’t. Instead, he sat quietly next to where I had parked my bike. Just quietly guarded it like a Sphinx. He didn’t even bark on people who were walking around him (he usually did). He never had any training whatsoever, he just did that intuitively and I just felt this unbelievable connection to him, as if he understood my worries and just behaved perfectly.

    I have actually found a dog, he’s the one I’m currently sponsoring. He’s just this sweet adorable little troublemaker. He’s the only thing that keeps me from cutting ties with this shelter completely but lately it has just been so hard. I truly wish I could adopt him but I can’t see that happening anytime soon. I haven’t seen him in more than a year now. I miss him terribly but I remember the feeling every time I’m back from the shelter, it’s like I’m mentally exhausted. The dogs are great, it’s the people who are a bit of a pill.

    Thanks for the input about charity. I just have to wrap my head around it. I really don’t feel like continuing but there’s that guilt and shame that’s eating away at me. I have some more pondering to do, it seems.

    #53987
    Allison
    Participant

    Hi Allan,

    It’s not a city shelter, it’s a private one. We have SPCA here which is sort of the ‘official’, government-endorsed animal group but it is well-known for its culling / euthanasia practice. There are many small private rescue groups because of this. These groups have a no-kill policy and focus on re-homing those animals, much like the shelter you’re volunteering for, it seems. Problem is, they’re usually so small that they don’t really need volunteers. It’s like volunteering on Thanksgiving, it’s the last thing they need.

    I chose my current shelter because they’re the biggest private shelter and I figured they needed as many help as they could get. However, it is so disorganized and I always feel somewhat uneasy / unwelcome there. There’s so much hostility.

    Once, this dog was following me as I was leaving the shelter and I was just about to pick him up to bring him back to the shelter when this guy told me not to. He then proceeded to yell at the dog very loudly, screaming at him telling him to go back inside. It went on for a few minutes but the dog was just stalling, keeping his head down throughout. It ended when someone else help coaxing the dog in. It was so ineffective and upsetting for everyone involved.

    Out of curiosity, how’s the organization like in your shelter? How do you handle visitors / volunteers / contributions?

    #54046
    @Jasmine-3
    Participant

    Thanks Allison.

    Listen to your inner guidance and follow your heart. You wont go wrong ever 🙂

    Have a fab day ahead

    J

    #54120
    Barbara
    Participant

    Hi Allyson
    I have to be blunt – but what your parents did to the pets in your care was at best ignorant and wrong, and im afraid in my opinion disgusting and deeply misguided. I am like you in that i have a kind of painful empathy with animals…when we see their pain it pains us , it hurts our heart. But at the same time there are those who dont share that sense of the beauty of all living things.
    I remember an uncle of mine had a beautiful farm dog – his spirit was visible…just a generous and girgeous animal. He hurt his leg in the harvester and none of the adults called a vet. I remember my hear aching as a 9 year old. I couldnt understand what was going on – what was wrong with these grown adults ??
    So i understand your love and kindness towards animals. You have a warm and kind heart. I know i would not be strong enough to work in a shelter, as i would not be able to save them so i really am greatful for your strength.
    I have worked occasionally as a collector on the street for a rescue centre and give donations, but you should really be proud. What you see is NOT easy and i think you are amazing. Your warmth and love for the animals radiates from your post. I am sure it is so hard to hear the harshness of that man who shouted – maybe you could broach a senior / kinder member of staff and tell them it was frightening and inappropriate. Or send an anonymous note perhaps ?
    It is such a harsh area – animal welfare is such a harsh and sad , yet rewarding area of work.
    Again i think you have a beautiful spirit. You are a wonderful petson. Take heart that the animals benefit from your words and kind pats and they know you are a kind person on their side.
    Love and regards 😉
    Barbs 🙂

    #54158
    Allison
    Participant

    Thanks, Barbara, for your kind words.

    I love my parents but I think they don’t know that to this day I still cry when I think of all my dogs that they’ve abandoned. What happened to them? Where did they sleep at night? Were they able to find something to eat? Since some of them would’ve been dead by now, where did they die? How did they die? and so on, and so on. Sometimes I even fantasize that one day I’d run into them on the street and be reunited, even though I know how impossible that is.

    About that farm dog, Gosh I know the feeling! That feeling of helplessness especially since we are still young with no resources whatsoever, and our hearts are just aching but all the adults whom we are told we can count on just fail us. Believe it or not, you are the first person to ever share the same pain!

    About the shelter…I’ll see what I can do, I just need some input and perspective from outsiders to plan my next move.

    Regards,
    Allison

    #54301
    Barbara
    Participant

    Hi Allison !

    Im so glad we connected as animal lovers ! Yes, I know that feeling, especially as a child – not to be able to do anything to shake these ‘grown up’s’ into action – and into seeing a living breathing living thing suffer – I cant understand it…To this day I find it hard to see an animal suffer. My parents live half the year abroad , and the house across the road had two huge mountain dogs – one chained – yes, chained, all the time. It sickens me to my core – so I hardly ever visit. To be honest I cant bear to stand by – and there are no animal welfare people over there who really will do something. I think when you connect with animals, and see the love and beauty in their eyes, it is a painfull searing anger that brews inside when I see people’s cruelty.

    One thing I have learned though is – if you dwell on it too much you could end up in a giant pit of depair – as there are so many cases in which we can do nothing.

    I want to get back to volunteering – ( which went by the wayside when my energy was zapped in a problematic relationship) And to try to do my part for the creatures that cannot speak for themselves. When I look at my own little cat – who is such a gorgeous funny creature – with all the dynamics of any living thing, I see the essence of the beauty of the world – it sounds mad, but I see that ! If I could have a huge house with lots of dogs, horses, etc I would !

    Allison, I think you are amazing to do what you do because it is emotional and you have that sensitivity to animals pain and their innocence. But no doubt the hard part is to stay detatched, it is near impossible, but do try to say to yourself ”I am doing all I can do right now, I am one person, and I am trying my best”. You have a big heart, so dont beat yourself that you cant save them all – as much as you would wish to with all your heart.

    I understand your pain in looking back to the dogs – but we dont know – maybe they were ok, found another home, and we will never know, which is hard. But I think maybe saying a little prayer / a good wish to Buddah, or just simply sending love to them, where ever they are, here or in heaven – might help you. The little child in you is still sad for the dogs, but try to send all the loving kindness to them, and then give yourself a hug.

    Yes, you are at the animal centre and you see pain, but it shows such strength of character. If you are having a hard day, try maybe to find a like minded spirit in there, maybe someone who you see is gentle, and chat to them. If necessary speak to someone trusted from another animal welfare organisation if you really see things that you feel are not right.

    You are a lovely person – stay strong, and its ok to be sad, to cry, and also to take a day off if you need it ! 🙂

    Sending love
    Namaste
    🙂

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