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- This topic has 245 replies, 2 voices, and was last updated 1 week ago by
anita.
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December 10, 2024 at 11:08 am #440068
ZenithParticipantMy family is only my support. I feel like I dont trust people anymore. My mom, husband and sometimes my siblings have been there for me during my tough times. Even if i make new friends, peopel change instantly. I met a friend who had similar experience. She told me that people will be close to you if they dont have any friends. Once they find new friends they change. I experienced this since childhood. I used to blame my self thinking that something is wrong with me. Now I dont blame myself its just shows who they are. This makes think I should my daughter a sibling. Family only stays with you through thick and thin. I am not sure if we can afford another kid.
December 10, 2024 at 11:48 am #440071
anitaParticipantDear Zenith:
Thank you (always) for sharing your feelings with me. You’ve been through a lot, and it’s understandable that these experiences shaped your views on trust and friendship.
It’s great that you have such a strong support system in your family. Having people who are consistently there for you is incredibly important, especially during tough times.
It is difficult, sometimes very difficult, when people we think we can rely on change or move on. Your feelings are valid, and it’s okay to feel the way you do.
Considering giving your daughter a sibling because of this is a big decision. It’s wonderful that you want to ensure she has a strong support system, just like you do. Balancing this desire with practical concerns, like affordability, is important. Remember, the love and support you provide as a parent are already a strong foundation for her.
* A personal note: my mother expressed to me that she had my sister (6 years after I was born) so to give me a support system. Unfortunately, and I suspect partly because of the age gap, having a (much younger) sister did not provide support to me while I was growing up.
Building trust and friendships can take time and can be difficult, especially with the experiences you’ve had (this is true to me too, give my experiences!). It’s okay to take things at your own pace and to focus on those relationships that make you feel safe and valued.
Whenever you want to talk more about this, I’m here for you.
anita
December 16, 2024 at 12:04 pm #440759ZenithParticipantI have been really busy at office. Thanks to you for always listening to my rants. I forget to mention your name. Apart from my family only you know my mental health struggles. I dont discuss my problems with my friends. My indian friends dont understand mental health issues so I dont talk about these issues to them. You have a really made a difference in my life by helping me navigate through some of my toughest times of my life.
December 16, 2024 at 5:06 pm #440779anitaParticipantDear Zenith:
I’m really glad I could be there for you. It means a lot to me to read that I’ve been able to make a difference during some of your toughest times. You’ve shown incredible strength in managing everything, especially when it’s hard to talk about mental health. Remember, you’re no alone in this, and I’m always here to listen and support you. Take care, and don’t hesitate to reach out whenever you need to share or just want to talk.
anita
December 17, 2024 at 6:25 am #440792anitaParticipantDear Zenith:
I wanted to add that the first time I read your recent message was yesterday afternoon while sitting in the car (not while driving!) I don’t use my phone to reply because it’s difficult for me and I figured I’ll do it later. But reading it, I felt that I was reading something very special, as in the best thing I ever read on the forums. It felt very special. I also felt grateful to you for caring to send this message to me. So, thank you, Zenith!
anita
January 2, 2025 at 12:12 pm #441218ZenithParticipantYou are welcome Anita! Happy New Year! How are you doing ?
January 2, 2025 at 12:20 pm #441221anitaParticipantDear Zenith:
I am tired and very cold. I am sitting in a heated office, been here for hours and yet my feet and hands feel frozen almost. Did you celebrate the New Year? (I am never out that late on any night).
anita
January 2, 2025 at 12:28 pm #441222ZenithParticipantlol. It happens in my office too. So I wear layers and always have a throw on my chair. Yeah my neighbor invited us to the new party along with some other friend and we had a great time.
January 2, 2025 at 1:15 pm #441223anitaParticipantDear Zenith: Good to read that you had a great time!!! I left the office, went to the pellet stove, took of my socks, warmed them up, ate cashew nuts and feel warmed up some. Raining acts and dogs outside, miserable weather. Three days ago, with wet socks, I walked across the kitchen, slipped and fell, bruised my face a bit and hurt my left shoulder.. wet, slippery weather really is dangerous.
anita
January 2, 2025 at 2:33 pm #441224ZenithParticipantThats sad. Take care.
January 2, 2025 at 4:41 pm #441225anitaParticipantThank you, Zenith,take care yourself!
Anita
January 3, 2025 at 12:53 pm #441252ZenithParticipantI am having a bad day Anita :(. I am here just to rant. Remember how I told you way back that how I am not happy with my current job. I have been telling my boss since Jan 2024 that I want to learn more technical stuff. I would always ask him for some interesting work but he would always give me thats already half done. I dont know why he is always hesitant about not giving me more technical stuff. Once he told me that he doesnt not want to set me up for failure. I was left with no work till August. We had a meeting in August I told him again that I wanted to do more technical stuff. Since September he told me to help the other teammate who was working on the other project related sql software. I started learning it and I picked it up pretty fast. I even helped my teammate with some of the stuff she is working on which he didnt know. He even appreciated about me about learning technical stuff in a different meeting. Now that the teammate has left the company. So the position is open. He didnt even ask me if I am interested in applying for that position. He directly put it up in the LinkedIn. I reached out to him asking him if I can apply for that position. He gave it a thought and told me no without even interviewing my skills. He straight up told me that I am not eligible for this role yet. He doesnt want me to directly put me in that position with no prior experience. He keeps telling me that I am not confident enough. I know I suck at my social skills. I am trying to work on . I feel so lost.
January 3, 2025 at 1:43 pm #441254anitaParticipantDear Zenith:
I am 😞 that you are having a bad day, and o understand why. You are definitely capable of more technical tasks and responibitoes at work, o have no doubt. I understand your frustration. I would like to write more, but using my phone. as I am doing now is difficult…
Anita
January 3, 2025 at 2:03 pm #441255anitaParticipantOne more thing:don’t give up, ZEnith: You are strong, capable and resilient. You overcame a lot, and came a long way. Your confidence has been growing. Your boss needs more time to see what I see what you are capable of.
Anita
January 3, 2025 at 6:28 pm #441256ZenithParticipantIts been 2.5 years since I started working now.I never messed up with the deliverables. I always finished my work on time. I wish he had given me chance to atleast interview me.I dont want to waste my time here. I want to move on some other company. I waited for the whole year. He told me same thing in the past that he doesnot want to set me up dor failure. I have never failed in my owork.
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