Dear Zenith:

Thank you (always) for sharing your feelings with me. You’ve been through a lot, and it’s understandable that these experiences shaped your views on trust and friendship.

It’s great that you have such a strong support system in your family. Having people who are consistently there for you is incredibly important, especially during tough times.

It is difficult, sometimes very difficult, when people we think we can rely on change or move on. Your feelings are valid, and it’s okay to feel the way you do.

Considering giving your daughter a sibling because of this is a big decision. It’s wonderful that you want to ensure she has a strong support system, just like you do. Balancing this desire with practical concerns, like affordability, is important. Remember, the love and support you provide as a parent are already a strong foundation for her.

* A personal note: my mother expressed to me that she had my sister (6 years after I was born) so to give me a support system. Unfortunately, and I suspect partly because of the age gap, having a (much younger) sister did not provide support to me while I was growing up.

Building trust and friendships can take time and can be difficult, especially with the experiences you’ve had (this is true to me too, give my experiences!). It’s okay to take things at your own pace and to focus on those relationships that make you feel safe and valued.

Whenever you want to talk more about this, I’m here for you.

anita