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- This topic has 20 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 5 years, 8 months ago by Anonymous.
September 27, 2017 at 8:35 am #170597
I think those questions would be better in person would they not.
I probably should have rose these issues on the last date.September 27, 2017 at 11:31 am #170629AnonymousGuest
In person maybe is better. I feel comfortable communicating online, like I am doing with you right this moment. I understand better when I read people’s thoughts than when I hear those. So I suppose it is a personal preference. I hope you do ask her the questions you have in one context or another, that you have a chance to do so and the courage it takes to ask and be willing to hear the answers.
anitaSeptember 27, 2017 at 12:53 pm #170655
I appreciate you taking the time to discuss this with me.
I hope I get the chance to do. If I haven’t heard from her over the next few days I will reach out over the weekend. If she gets back to me, I will try and seek closure one way or the other after speaking with her. If she doesn’t get back to me then I guess I will already have the closure.September 27, 2017 at 5:37 pm #170685ElianaParticipant
I don’t think at this time this woman is emotionally available for a committed relationship. No one should invest more time and energy on someone then they spend on you, and she is not investing anything. You are doing all the chasing..waiting..wondering..for something that is more of a pen-pal relationship. I think you should move on as you deserve better.September 28, 2017 at 2:03 am #170711
I think you are right. I sent her a message this morning to see how her week is going etc.
If I hear nothing back I will move on and delete her details etc.
I do think I will tell her that she should have said she wasn’t interested rather than just going quiet/cold. I think the time we spent together etc warranted that and it is just the decent thing to do and what I would have done to her.
A little gutted about it as we got on so well I thought and there is no real reason for what has happened. She was so keen to begin with and I didn’t change and was always nice to her so not sure what I did wrong.September 28, 2017 at 5:41 am #170731AnonymousGuest
You are welcome. As to the last sentence you wrote, right above: “not sure what I did wrong”-
Maybe you did nothing wrong. You don’t know who she is, how she thinks, what motivates her, what she values, so you are left wondering if you did something wrong and/ or … who is this woman you had such a good time with. All this wondering is a waste of your time because you don’t have information.
My point to you is and has been that with her, if there is to be further communication, and with other women in the future- instead of assuming, hoping, wondering- ask: get the information, and do so earlier than later.
Begin to get to know the woman right away: what does she value in a man, in a potential boyfriend, what is she looking for in a relationship, what is most important in her life and share the same, see if there is a match. It also feels good to know and be known in the context of a developing relationship.