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Posts by Dr. Daniel H. Shapiro

Dr. Daniel H. Shapiro is keynote speaker, author, and mentor. He is passionate about human connection and the stories we carry with us. For more information about his book, The 5 Practices of the Caring Mentor, or his mentoring and speaking services, check out yourinherentgoodness.com.

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What I Learned from a Lifetime of Feeling Different

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“Not until we are lost do we begin to find ourselves.” ~Henry David Thoreau

I’ve spent most of my life feeling like I was standing just outside the circle.

Not always, but whenever I stepped back and looked at the whole of my life, the thread running through has been a sense of being on the outside looking in.

I think that feeling drove me for a long time. I wanted to prove something, to earn my place through effort and excellence. I wanted to be the kind of person people were glad to know.

I pushed myself in sports, …

The Wonder and Heartbreak of Life Under Our Sky

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“The world is indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair, and though in all lands love is now mingled with grief, it grows perhaps the greater.” ~J.R.R. Tolkien

It was my son’s fifteenth birthday. His basketball game got canceled, so my wife, my son, and I climbed back into the car a bit disappointed and started the drive home.

We were just heading back to the house as we always did after games. My wife was mid-sentence when something caught my eye before she could finish it. …

How I Stopped Being the Victim of My Own Story

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“The most common form of despair is not being who you are.” ~Søren Kierkegaard

A few years ago, I was catching up over coffee with an old friend I’ll call Ray, a trusted mentor. He’s a few years older than me, silver-haired and down to earth, the kind of man who listens with his whole heart.

We were at a small coffee shop near my house. I told him about my first year as a director, how I’d gone from being a counselor whose identity was built around listening and connecting to suddenly managing budgets, writing evaluations, and holding people …

The Beautiful Gift We Give Without Even Knowing

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“The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Five years ago, my son missed a basketball tryout.

We had been out of town, and by the time we got back, the rosters were already set. I made a few calls anyway, hoping someone might give a kid a late shot. One coach said yes. He had a spot left, and he was willing to take a chance on a name he’d never heard from a father he’d never met.

That coach became one of my closest friends.

I started coming to practices to help …