B Back to u in a few hours, Confused <

Good 🌄 Confused:

I think that your insight last night (your Tuesday early morning) is the first significant insight (one that can make a positive difference) since we started talking.

You wrote: “I guess I’m too selfish focusing only on my feelings!”-

I think the word is self-centered (tunnel-visioned) rather than selfish. But point is, you’ve been locked-in, consumed by what you don’t feel (or don’t always feel), and what you “should” feel for her, feeling guilty, so much so, that you didn’t notice that she often feels good because of you.

What if every time you’re troubled with what you “should” feel- you shift your focus and remember a time when she was joyful because of you: when she smiled, when she was kind, etc. It could be like throwing water 💧 on the 🔥 of I-should-feel-but-don’t-feel thoughts.

💧💧💧 Anita

No, not selfish.. maybe tunnel vision, not seeing the bigger picture: that in her mind and heart you’re the bee’s knees, and that’s her reward.

Do you know the saying- the bee’s knees?

(🐝 🐝 don’t have knees.)

Thank you for using my preferred emoji 🙂

🌙 🎊 Anita

I like it that you like how I framed it 😏

It didn’t occur to me either until I posted it: it feels good to feel kind and generous, and that’s indeed her reward 🎁

And I’m not surprised she feels loving and kind and happy because you’re in her life. I happen to feel happy every time you post here 😊

🌙 🎁 🤍 Anita

Hey Dear Confused:

Acting on your values- 👏

Next time she is very kind to you.. think of how good she’s feeling, so good that she’s motivated to buy you gifts or say supportive things.

There’s warmth in her heart because you’re in her life- that’s her reward. It’s already there. Her reward already happened.

🎁🤍🎵 Anita

Condused: “I feel… It makes me feel… My feelings are eluding me”-

Feelings are very important bur they’re not everything. They have to be balanced by accurate thinking, truth-telling, I’d you will.

I asked what do you think you owe her. What if I asked, in addition to this question, what do you feel you owe her?

🤔🎈⏸️ Anita

Hey Dear Confused:

“What did I do to deserve such a kind and loving soul?”-

Lots of people feel like they have to do something grand so to deserve love. This is how I used to feel. But now, I understand that love is not something to be earned, but a gift to receive.

Your fear that you’ll disappoint her.. is it the fear that you’re not deserving of her love and it’s only a matter of time before she figures it out?

🤔 🤍 Anita

Good morning, Thomas 🙂

Thank you and glad to read from you this day after Easter 🐣

The biggest job I ever performed on a car was to check the oil level and add oil. So, from where I’m at, I admire your ability to do all the mechanical work you’re able to do 👍

Is feeling dizzy and having headaches a result of high blood pressure?

I wish you calm and health, Thomas 🙏

🤍 Anita