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ainka

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 24 total)
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  • #52147
    ainka
    Participant

    txs

    #52145
    ainka
    Participant

    txs i really appreciate it. when i have been forsaken by all someone like u really came ahead to help . txs again.

    #52080
    ainka
    Participant

    txs but life has been so rude to me i cannot forgive

    #52071
    ainka
    Participant

    txs

    #52070
    ainka
    Participant

    best wishes to u

    #52069
    ainka
    Participant

    txs jasmine its very true i dnt love myself.
    i dnt know the reason y but its true.
    as a child i was really loved by my parents. i got good grades so teachers loved me too. but since i am an introvert i never had many friends. i had no knowleadge abt ppl how they behave in a social situation.
    but afterall this i have started hating myself. and bcuz of this i have lost all desire to live.

    #52068
    ainka
    Participant

    txs Celina and anyone.

    its quite stranage but i want u to read this please do.

    I WAS BORN AND NURTURED INTO A FAMILY THAT PRACTISED SPIRITULAITY. SO I DIDNT KNEW THAT PEOPLE LIED AND CHEATED, ITS STRANGE BUT TRUE.
    i loved my x deeply thinking love conquers all. so i cudnt acually understand his manipulative ways so he took advantage of that. he acually used me. so i hate him for this bcuz after him i stopped trusting ppl.
    but still like everywomen i hopped that he wud change. he wud cheat me and when i wud withdraw in silence and tried healing myself he wud come back again and then cry and do all over again. it went on non stop for 10 yrs 6 mnts we wud talk and then 6 mnts NC. i know i shudnt have trusted him , but he also didnt hesitate to kill me, my hopes. i simply died from inside.
    i lost interest in everything, i stopped taking care of myself, i have a job which i do but then i dnt give my 100% to it. i dnt cook survive on bread, though my friends used to say i was good at cooking.
    i made a last attempt in healing myself by cutting myself completely from him. but i failed again, he said he wanted forgiveness and in that process he reminded me of things i wanted to forget.
    i feel i m dead now and no attempt to revive my life can work. i am already 34 giving away my 10 yrs to him.
    but god treated him so well, he got a job in paris, he has a wife a newly born son, all that he wanted in life.
    but after seeing this i do ques god, WhY ME< I ALWAYS FOLLOWED UR PATH THEN Y ME AND U HAVE BLESSED A SINNER__STRANGE

    #52048
    ainka
    Participant

    but i have been trying for past 5 yrs now but the let go is not happening.

    #52047
    ainka
    Participant

    but somehow i feel i do love him, and i will nt b able to love anyone else. is it ok to b in love with a abuser?

    #52042
    ainka
    Participant

    take care be postive u will find a way.

    #52041
    ainka
    Participant

    Hi i should ask u first how r u, u seem to b a good guy at heart but there is loneliness in ur heart, u think u will choose people who will fill that loneliness for u, but it doent work like that, u have to love everyone and everything in life only then life will open up to u. so what u want to do in ur free time? try to love and care for people who come ur way, weather its in ur shop or else care for little children, old people adopt a pet, make friends atleast talk to people .
    u will not know when love wud open ur doors and u wlll be in love again with life and then u will find ur love.
    Best wishes.

    #52040
    ainka
    Participant

    txs for ur advice mark and celina u both r such wonderful people, txs i do understand everything but still there r few things which i canot understand.

    1. its been more than 5 yrs when i broke up i decided enough was enough, i loved him but i cudnt see myself insulted everytime. but in these 5 yrs i didnt find the love of my life, and everyone started ques my single status, i m 34 and everyone comes nd tell me i wnt become a mother as i am too old for that. i feel like a looser.
    2. he illtreated me but howcome he is so caring for his wife, is he rite that fault was mine not his.
    3, how can a manipulator find peace and happiness who tortures a girl to an extent that she becomes a vegetable. is there no justice.
    4. will i ever fnd a man who will love and respect me.
    5. y did i have to suffer so much of pain when my fault was that i loved him so much.
    6. how can i get rid of the pain ( i failed so many times, i have just given up hope.
    can u ans me as my mind is in a state where i cannot think.

    #52001
    ainka
    Participant

    plz ans me

    #51995
    ainka
    Participant

    i dnt know how to explain myself, i was lonely introvert as a child, as a teenager i experienced love though he loved me but he dumped me for he had no money to marry me. i entered into another relationship thinking that if i am honest he wud love me but he played mind games with me for 10 yrs wnt let me out and if i broke up wud entice me back again with false promises, i loved him so waited him to cahnge but he didnt. i decided to move awaay which i did i was on the verge of healing 90% healed when he came gain and i was again draged into pain, he was married by now but still played games with me by making me feel that i have lost him, i have lost a perfect husband as he is to his wife etc. i just let him go bcuz i cudnt marry a man who didnt respect me or love me but after 5 yrs of loneliness i ques myself did i make a mistake.?

    #51910
    ainka
    Participant

    i think no one wants to ans me

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 24 total)