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Csihdu

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  • in reply to: Time to let go? (friendship) #121946
    Csihdu
    Participant

    Hi Unconditional,

    Yes I am very afraid they will tempt me back into this type of lifestyle. I have tried to make it clear on several occasions I’m not interested in doing these types of things any more, but I don’t think it’s of much interest to them. They think it’s a “phase” I’m going through.

    I do try and inspire them to improve, in the act of offering advice and guidance, but sometimes I feel like my kindness gets taken for weakness with these particular people. Hence why I perhaps questioning whether it is time to let go. Other than these wild nights where I feel like I don’t belong any more I seldom see them.

    In response to “If you are upset that you are only giving and not getting, then theyโ€™re not truly your friends anyway, and so you should have no trouble letting go” I think this may be a little wishful thinking. In an ideal world it would be easy to let go of unhealthy relationships, but in reality we know it’s not quite as simple as that. I understand how you can come to the conclusion that “there is no problem” but it is not that way I see it at the moment, as explained in my previous point and it’s a little upsetting for someone to invalidate my problems so blunty. However, I completely appreciate this may not be the outcome you intended with your words.

    in reply to: Struggling with anxiety #121668
    Csihdu
    Participant

    Hi Libby,

    I have an underactive thyroid also (diagnosed when I was 19) and the myriad of problems it occurs is astounding. In the UK (where I am) I get free medication for life because of the problems you can experience from it. I have been on antidepressant medication for 7 years (ever since my thyroid was diagnosed as underactive), anxiety medication occasionally, I have mood swings which are very frequent and intense, I struggle with weight gain, I get extremely tired very easily and all of this contributes to a feeling of unhappiness. I discovered that I am not alone in this when I joined a facebook forum for people with underactive thyroids. People I have spoken to on there have been on antidepressent medication for 20 years!

    I’m on an appropriate amount of Levothyroxine, but honestly the symptoms never truly go away. I guess the point of what I’m trying to say is that some of what you may be feeling may be down to biological factors, and that you’re not alone. Be gentle with yourself. You are doing well. And know that every day you wake up is a success.

    I see the advice given from others above is great, I just thought it might be helpful to share my thyroid knowledge! ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope it helps.

    in reply to: Time to let go? (friendship) #121659
    Csihdu
    Participant

    Hi Nina,

    I think that sounds like a good compromise. No need to throw daggers, but equally I think distance between myself and these people will actually do me good. As the Buddha said nothing is life is permanent ๐Ÿ™‚

    in reply to: Time to let go? (friendship) #121658
    Csihdu
    Participant

    Hi VJ,

    What I mean in that context is that before I used to not challenge things if I disagreed with certain things, or I was a people pleaser. For example there was night where said friend was flirting, sharing drinks and holding hands with a man. She has a boyfriend and I asked her how she would feel if her boyfriend did this to her and she didn’t care. I felt uncomfortable and wanted to leave, and she accused me of ruining the fun. Before, say a year ago, perhaps I would have just not said anything, despite feeling uncomfortable. My therapist thinks I have co-dependent tendencies and we worked on setting boundaries in relationships.

    This is what they do not like.

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