Dear Alecsee

“I’m always fixated on her body type as it’s not common and she fit my ideal girl language and type standards.” Whoa she is a human being, with a mind, emotions & feelings & a life with all its struggles ups & downs. In a LDF people are mainly in a 2 dimensional relationship, 90% fiction & the 10% reality of when they meet up which is for the most part either honeymoon or hell neither of which is healthy.
Chalk it up to experience, do not bother trying to figure her out, look to where you need to grow ie lying to someone to either prompt a reaction or to hurt their feelings.
Roberta

Dear Sonia

It can be hard to get the balance right when being supportive to a needy friend.
Maybe you can get him involved with volunteering or a hobby with other people to give him an alternative outlet & or you could start to do those kind of things for yourself & then he would understand that you have less time for him.
Ultimately we want our friends to be happy & self-reliant.
Like every one else has said you are not responsible for your friends depression.
Once you put in place healthy boundaries you may start to enjoy being around him.
Kind regards
Roberta

Hi Anita
Yes that little white rabbit touched my heart many years ago, the books had so much depth to them & the drawings are magical.

Dear Anita

There is a book from my childhood called Pookie and another called Pookie’s Christmas. The one about Christmas bridges the gap between belief in Santa & total annihilation of that belief. It is still in print & I share them with my grandchildren. The written word is under the right speech category in Buddhism. Is it timely, is it helpful etc. This is something to be mindful everyday in all our interactions with others. Often we get too swept up in our busyness to take heed of these things.
Kind regards
Roberta

Hi
I see the nun as brave & wise.
It takes a lot of courage to stand up in front of your peers & teachers.
She was wise not to keep quiet, this could have been misinterpreted as colluding or encouraging the monk.
This story is still relevant today in our modern world.

Dear Confused.

My son has suffered from the Blah’s since their teens. One of first breakthroughs that i noticed was that we found a park that he could easily frequent, & then he joined a charity which help look after that park. He now volunteers one day a week for a homeless cafe & this really has shifted something for him. He sees & takes notice about the ways he can help others, even going out of his comfort zone.
Just because your life feels grey to you, it does not stop you from bringing a little colour to someone else’s life. So volunteering for something that you think is a worthy cause could help to break the cycles of thinking about her.

Teachings on a precious human birth helps one realise what a rare opportunity we have & how to use this precious gift in conjunction with the bodhisatva vow, we can alleviate not only our personal suffering, but help others too.
I aware that I, as do others have a body that is subject to sickness, old age & death this acceptance alone reduces my suffering.
Meditation & wisdom teachings & ethical conduct help me to be less of a pain the butt to my self & others.
wishing you all a wise & wonderful 2026

Dear Squiggly pop

There are definitely some interesting dynamics going on for you City, parents, job, & relationship.

Has there ever been a place you have visited that you felt deeply connected to? If so there is a lovely website called workaway where you can either choose & or a location /job you fancy having a go at. Then you stay with real people & get bed & board in exchange for about 20+hrs a week work so it is a mini living experience rather than the unreality of a vacation experience.

Do you have siblings? If so now might be a good time to have “The Conversation” of who is going to do what & when around your ageing parents care needs. If no-one is going to step up, then most if not all of their assets will be needed to take care of them & the children may even also have to help out financially.

If you start to think of a romantic relationship as a bonus to your general sense of wellbeing /happiness rather than foundational to your happiness there will be more joy & less loneliness in your current life. Chemically nearly everyday we have a dip in our moods once you can see/pinpoint it then it is easier to accept & see it as part of life’s natural rhythm.

Assess what is truly important, the kind of job you want , is it for status, large financial gain, are you concerned at all about the ethics around of the line of work you want to do?
Kind regards
Roberta