Dear Eva

You like everyone else deserve to be listened to, treated with love & compassion. This is how you must talk to yourself with kindness, I doubt at the moment your ex would treat the next woman any better, hopefully he will stay single until he has grown emotionally, but enough about him.
You now have the time & space to find your joys, explore new enviroments or revisit what made you smile before you even met this guy.
Life is too short & too precious to waste time & energy on ifs, buts & maybes. If you want a happier future, start planting those seed here & now. Your garden of happiness does not need any noxious weeds like your ex in it.
It is time for me to do my prayers, I will dedicate them to you & your happiness.
Kind regards
Roberta

Good Morning Anita

We are connected – thank you for being in my life even if it has thru the media of this forum because we are physically so many many miles apart that we can not enjoy a walk together or meet up for a cup of tea & a casual chat.
with love Roberta

Hi Peter
Lovely post, it described the hard to grasp concept in such an eloquent way.
I look forward to more positive input from you & those you find inspirational
Roberta

When one discerns the voices in the head – anger greed jealousy fear etc see them name, them they loose their power
When one feel love compassion empathy in ones heart name them & feel the light grow to nourish your self & others

Dear Kris

Do you mean me or Thomas or both of us in all/parts of your last post?#
I will certainly endeavor not to cross boundaries once I know about them.
I hope you find church uplifting tomorrow.
Best wishes
Roberta

Good Morning Confused

Thank you for your reply.

Like a lot of things in life it can be hard to see what comes first, but I think that by trying to practice patience in everyday moments helps break the cycle of suffering no matter what its roots. If I feel impatience arising whilst say cuing for groceries or gas I remember to take 3 long slow breaths & then I start wishing the people in front of me & the cahier …may you be happy. This is a good use of my time & does not leave room for anxious/negative thoughts to take hold.

Whilst journalling you may find that like a lot of humans we have different energy & emotion levels throughout the day. Me personally I am quite energetic physically & more receptive & resilient in the mornings. Then from about 4pm I start to get peopled out & want to slow down & quieten my surroundings. So I try to work with my natural rhythms, on days that I work late afternoon into early evening I take a siesta after lunch to recharge my batteries, so that I amin a good position to do my job well.

Also another thing to hold in mind even if it is an urban myth, is that there are natural lulls /silence occurs in any conversations/gatherings & that’s okay – even though many people feel uncomfortable with that gap it is not necessary to instantly feel something has gone wrong. if you were sitting around a campfire you would just peacefully watch the flames in a comfortable silence.

I wish you a cool weekend
Roberta

Dear Kris

I am so sorry that this year so far has been very difficult for you, so much loss in so many ways, thankyou for sharing.

I note that your interests on the surface appear to be quite solitary indoor activities. I think that initially instead of looking for romance maybe begin with fostering connections to the outdoors & others not necessarily humans. For instance offering to bake at a homeless shelter, playing your violin at a hospice or carehome, join your local conservation group or animal sanctuary these kinds of activities also look good on your CV.

What kinds of jobs would you like to do to earn a living? I work 15 hours in a preschool & 7 in a care facility this gives me just enough to get by as I live in a shared house & I have time to do charity stuff, walks with friends/family, go to board games nights & most importantly meditate & study Buddhism & wellbeing.
Got to sign off now & feed our 3 chickens.
Kind regards
Roberta

Dear Confused

At some point in our convo, she took like 25 mins to answer and because her previous replies were not too sweet (she was indeed affectionate but my damn mind setting high standards again), i started thinking that she’s tired of me, ………

Do you read back your posts? Can you see patterns emerging? Impatience leads to anxiety or possibly vice versa. It was not so long ago that people living even a short distance apart would have to write each other letters & would have to wait days/weeks & even months for a reply. This modern busy world has reduced our ability to be patient & raised our expectations for instant gratification/input. I am going to the toilet now & then I am going to wash my dishes & then get the clothes off the line fold them up & put them away too much info for you? I will just politely sign off.
Roberta