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prudence

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Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 12 total)
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  • #292179

    prudence
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    Dear Anita

    Actually i want the opposite, i want to get married , have a house of my own, and i don’t want kids with different baby daddaies, yes i failed with my baby daddy but i had to let that 1 go for my sanity.

     

    #292173

    prudence
    Participant

    yes she never got married

    #292169

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    Yes, he was afraid that his baby mama will think my son is his son. So he said he needed some time to get his self together, i gave him the space he needed.

    I stay with my mom, when she and my dad met, he was married , even after she got pregnant with me, he never left his wife, so he stays with his family

    We are 4 on my mother’s side and each one of us have their own father, i don’t blame my mom for this, i think she just continued looking for an ideal man who can love her and marry her someday, just like i never gave up on love even after i was hurt so many times.

    I find it hard for me to move on  and to be alone, i want so much affection

    #292153

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    Thank you for your reply

    1. I won’t feel relieved at all, last time he ignored me i felt like i did something wrong, i thought i was too clingy , i think i pushed him away

    2. A wise choice for me.  Is to not give him the chance to even talk to me, i will Make it clear to him, that he is dead to me.

    It is true, i feel like Maybe he stays with some where he works, but i am not sure, and i think him and his baby mama didn’t really break up

    Oh i forgot this, before he ghost me, we were planning i should visit and then i posted a picture of us on Facebook a day before, making our relationship official, he got so angry saying his baby mama is angry, she will take him to court because he have another child (my son) i found his reason dodgy but i thought i was just over thinking, but hey i was stupid and a fool to let another man play me like this

    #292149

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Valora

    Thank you for your kind And encouraging words, i will definitely look for that book, and try new things that cost less, thank you for your suggestions

    #292087

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Peter

    Thank you for your reply but i do not understand your question

    #292085

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Anita. Thank you for your reply, you are right i was the one who was wrong by ignoring red flags

     

    About him being paid, he said he will be paid on the 30 of April so i will come on the first of May, so on the 30th he was supposed to send me money for transport but he didn’t answer his phone when i called.

    I then sent him a message on WhatsApp saying hello, what time are you gonna send the money coz its already late, he read and didn’t reply, i sent him another text asking him if the money is not enough i will understand, since its hard because it will be me and my son, and baby needs a lot of things, so he replied no, its not that its just that the money didn’t go in , and i replied OK, then the conversation ended.

    Yesterday he didn’t even text me, i called him he didn’t answer or even get back to me , so i sent him text on WhatsApp saying “you said enough today” he logged in and read it and even now he never replied.

    #292083

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Valora , thank you for your reply

    Yes i want a man whose words line up with actions, i want him to be affectionate. You are right i was the wrong one by continuing with him after he ghost me, the guy is just words not actions and that’s a complete deal breaker for me.

    But i am afraid to be alone, i am unemployed it will be difficult for me to find new hobbies without money, all i do is just watch TV which later drains my energy, i feel useless and like an embarrassment since i never had any relationship that i can say was good , i feel like a failure in life in general, like the worst was only made for me, nothing best, the only blessing i have is my son, the other things are worst, worst things that always happen to me.

    #292081

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Mark

    Thank you for your reply, i am 22.  I have a son, i have never been single for too long like maybe a year.

    All of my exes , some are closed off, some just literally cheat on me .

    I was in college now i finished and i am unemployed, i feel useless, and maybe i get clingy in a relationship because i have nothing to do , my 2 exes before my baby daddy , both cheated on me and date a girl from my res, after i found out , they continue seeing those girls in front of me, i think that’s what made me clingy in my other relationships

    #291257

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    Thank you so much for taking your time to explain this to me in detail, you are a one in a million, i will start pausing when i feel anger coming, and i will think of what benefits me and my son before acting, thank you so much. If you like to add something.  Don’t hesitate, it could help me alot.

    Prudence

    #291209

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Inky

    When i gave birth he never came and see his baby, so he is not in his birth certificate. While i was pregnant i used to visit his auntie’s home every weekend. He was unemployed by then but was on a learnership, his auntie never liked me, but i had the urge to see him every time so i forced coming to his aunt’s place

    He used to go to clubs and i forced to go with him, though i didn’t like it, deep down i knew he didn’t love me , but i stayed because i didn’t want my baby to grow up without his father. But anyway we used to fight every time i tell him im tired i need to go home and rest (since i was pregnant), he would get angry that i made him leave the party early. This hurt me but i stayed, we would have sex and he would tell me to leave the next day, but its like i was addicted to him.

    So about the DNA, when i gave birth , my mother reach out to his aunt and his aunt replied , i don’t know any baby, but she knew coz i was pregnant , he agreed that its his baby in front of her , but she became sarcastic in front of my mother and another thing is i don’t want to be desperate again, i rather let him go . Anita is right , my baby is better off without him

    Thank you for your reply and advice inky

    #291207

    prudence
    Participant

    Dear Anita

    I tried to explain the whole situation and exactly what i said i the first thread but when i submitted the post my phone froze so i thought it didn’t submit, and tried to keep it brief this time.  Thank you for your reply , my baby daddy is not in his other children’s lives and his dad is alive but he hates his dad coz his elders blamed him for his mother’s death, i know he can never forgive me for this but, what steps should i take to forgive myself, to control my temper, and to think before i say something or act , it seems difficult to me.

Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 12 total)