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September 24, 2013 at 12:30 pm in reply to: They say be true to yourself…but what if yourself sucks? #42706
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantGosh, you are awfully hard on yourself. You were thrust into a parenting role that wasn’t yours to take and you ponied up until you were 18, that is very admirable in my book. We all feel like we are selfish jerks at our core, sometimes. I think the key for you is forgiving yourself. Maybe somewhere you don’t believe that you deserve to be happy.
You had a rough time of it, I don’t think you did anything wrong. Go to counseling, work through your issues, work on loving yourself. You can’t change just for this man but, until you learn to love yourself, how can you love anyone else?? You are worthy of every good thing, be as kind to yourself as you would be to a total stranger.
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantWell, you asked for my opinion and I gave it to you. Good luck to you.
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantI would say, go both to AA or Alanon. Then go to couples counseling, she will forgive you or she won’t you can’t keep it a secret, it is a cancer to your soul. Forgive yourself, tell her and let the cards fall where they may. I truly hope it works out for you xo
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantForgiveness is a gift you give yourself. Take the high road, go see him, make the effort, don’t have regrets. I had a similar situation, my dad is gone now, he died last October, I have no regrets, I always let love and compassion lead the way. I hope you can too.
May 24, 2013 at 1:03 pm in reply to: 3 years from now seems like forever – How to appreciate what I have now? #36083GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantI think you sound depressed, judging by the oversleeping, being late, over eating etc. Maybe get into counseling and possibly an anti-depressant?
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantI know what you mean, sometimes you just have to put it down. The only way you can change a man is if he’s wearing a diaper HA!
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantWell I’m glad to know that you can do it on your own. I’ve been where you are at and it is scary and confusing. If you can get in to see a counselor, it might help you sort things out. All the best to you, you seem like a really smart and lovely young lady. Don’t settle for less than you deserve, which is the best!
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantYou’re not wrong to feel angry. He keeps yanking your chain and making promises he might have no intention of keeping. I understand you wanting to have him in your baby’s life, that is totally natural. You can have him in your baby’s life in years to come, that doesn’t mean you have to be together as a couple. Just stay away from him for now, it doesn’t mean maybe in time that you can’t work it out but you are crazy if you keep giving him chances right now. Cut off contact until you have the baby, if he really really wants to be in your lives, he will find a way, one that doesn’t include half assed promises. Have you thought about placing your baby for adoption? It is an option if you feel like you are totally unprepared for having a baby at this point in your life.
Just take care of you right now, if it’s meant to be it will be, stop letting him hurt you, you deserve better.
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantI wish there were more parents in the world with your love and understanding Mandy, you are amazing.
GreatWhiteGoddessParticipantI’m sorry you are going through that with your loved ones Simon. Saying they support you but then making you feel bad about what you have to do to lead your authentic life is not really support at all. Please ask your mom to read this, I don’t know if you are gay or not gay as I do understand that gender has nothing to do with sexuality. But, I do love the whole, I love you if you do what I want aspect of it. I do hope that things turn out, keep your head up.
http://www.danoah.com/2011/11/im-christian-unless-youre-gay.html
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