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July 4, 2018 at 11:02 pm in reply to: Diagnosed with Depression/Anxiety and lost my job in the same week. #215475
Right now there are too many scenarios that are happening which created this gigantic and chaotic whirlpool of darkness that has block your sight. So all that you can see right now is a bleak future with little hope to hold your hand.
Since it’s all so overwhelming right now, it is suggested that you take one thing among the piles of to dos and break them down into managaeable steps.
Say you want to start a plan for the depression diagnosis, do you have a therapist in mind yet? If not, is there a directory where you can start? You don’t have to contact anyone right away, just have a few options written down.
Per your employment, can your friends help with recommendation? Are there government centers that might be able to help with your starting point and the next few steps?
But remember, its not about doing all of these things at once but rather breaking them into smaller steps so that it won’t be as overwhelming as it was before. It’s okay to take one step at a time.
And there will be time when you’ll just want to just give up or not give a damn and that’s okay too, it will never be easy. But let yourself feel your loss and everything in between. You’ll probably wake up and face the morning with gritted teeth, losing count in the many times you feel life sucks. You’ll feel that it’s too much, everything feels so heavy and you’re so tired. And in those times, the most you can do is keep moving. You force yourself to because there is a light behind that wall of darkness, the one you will have to make yourself.
You’ve started the first step in asking for help, now it’s up to you to keep going.
- This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by GL.
I do not share the same continent as you, but I do share a similar culture to what you are describing in your post. From where I am living, success, to people, is doing things and making it known. Because if people knew that you were the winner in a competition or really smart or pretty or something, then that makes you a winner in life. Even if your life only consists of your family, friends and people you interact with in school and your neighborhood. And thats great for them because that might be what they wanted.
But I need you to take a step back from your dilemma and ask yourself why success means so much to you. Why is success the goal? Why do you have to be successful? What does success even look like? Ask yourself where these thoughts come from. Then ask yourself what you want from it.
Take your thoughts for what they are, but don’t allow them to determined who you are. And it’s hard, it is, but your thoughts only have power over you when you allow them to. So let them come, but gently let them go. Thoughts are only thoughts until you take actions.
I don’t think I’m qualify to write anything so I can only send you these links and hope they’ll help you in some way. Good luck.
May I put in something? You can ignore this if it doesn’t make sense to you.
I understand that the thought of conforming merely for the sake of conforming gives you a bad taste, but does interests in movies, novels, hobbies, etc have to be about conforming/adhering to one opinion? People have their likes and dislikes. Two people might have the same hobby, but different reasons for keeping up with it, or they may just like it. A group of people might have the same opinion on a subject, but different viewpoints as to why. And it’s fine because people will have their opinions regardless. They are not conforming to one thing, but voicing their interests/connection to a subject with similar likes. It’s also fine to be speculative about someone’s else opinion (you just have to find a person’s whose opinion you trust to tell you the why to their like). Or if that didn’t make sense.
From your example of The Lego Movie: I didn’t watch it until a few years after it was made into disc form since it didn’t look interesting to me, but I did and I also didn’t like it. It didn’t really strike me as a good movie in my own opinion, though there were some lessons that I did agree with that was presented in the movie. I didn’t like the movie as a whole (subject), but I did like some of the amusing scenes. Some people might agree with me or disagree with me and that’s fine because it’s their opinion, which is something to be respected. So it’s not really about conforming or not conforming, it’s just people liking or disliking what they will. Of course, there are ‘zombies’, as you put it, that conform because they feel that they have to. But I believe that being aware of yourself and treating yourself with respect will prevent that from happening, which sounds like you already are so that’s no problem.
And I agree, it’s lonely that there might not be a lot of people that share your interests or opinion, but it never hurts to ask them about the why. They may not like something as a whole, but they may still like some of the details associated with it. It can bring about a good conversation and you might learn a little more about the person. Though I do encourage you to try the things that are the in at the moment, if it looks interesting to you, since you never know if you’ll like it or not unless you try it out for yourself. But it’s also fine if you don’t, it’s just a suggestion of mine.
I hope this helps you in some way. Best of luck to you.