I am so very sorry.  I empathize completely.  I’ve no great words of wisdom for you.  🙁

Dear miyoid,  Not to be dramatic, I had a horrible/violent childhood.  I do think back, now and then, but I find due to circumstances it does more harm than good.   The fact that you go back to a time that was special, you were loved etc., there’s nothing wrong with that at all.  From what I’ve learned (through Buddhism among other things) is we shouldn’t reside there nor in the future.  The only thing we have is today, right now.  Once I learned that lesson and retooled my thoughts, I felt a whole lot better about everything.   I forgave my mom years ago (dad always said she did the best she could) and rarely think of those times.   Same with the future.  I’m not in very good health (Primary Progressive MS).  I cannot go down that road either as I will spin out of control.  I hoped what I’ve said makes sense, lol.  More importantly, I hope I’ve helped you in at least a tiny way.

Dear Pritu, I love what you wrote!  I’m wondering why the need to label “soulmate” is necessary?  In my humble opinion only, the need to label anything can be a game changer at best.  The relationship you describe is amazing and sounds like what we all hope for.  So I guess my question is why label it?  It sounds as if the two of you will be friends forever, and that’s a rare, beautiful thing.  If you’re asking advice, mine would be to be grateful for what you have/found.  Please don’t muddle yourself with labels as there is absolutely no need.  I hope I’ve helped somewhat! 🙂