Forum Replies Created
May 12, 2013 at 7:20 pm #35483
This may be a strange perspective… I am so incredibly jealous that this is the type of problem you are dealing with. I so wish had acne and had low self esteem. I am instead dealing with digestive health issues, issues that my parents abandoning me as a child. I have such high anxiety that doctors have to give me an EKG to make sure it is not my heart that has a problem but is my mind that controls it.
I just want you to know that you can control your mind and you are worthy of all of the love and kindness that exists on this planet. Each human is equal and many of us see media or beauty on tv, internet etc… Those forms of”beauty” are photoshopped and not real. Maybe take some time listening to Tara Brach https://www.youtube.com/user/tarabrach she is like my dose of a daily counselor when i cannot see mine. Everything you want someone to say to you she says and it feels true and relatable. I truly believe that learning self-compassion is a skill that takes time but is fully worth it. Maybe you have not tried listening to a you-tube or a podcast but just give one a try, i never did until very recently and it has helped tremendously. this link is for cultivating compassion https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Alh1EmP2Of8
Tara Brach is a leading western teacher of Buddhist meditation, emotional healing and spiritual awakening.May 8, 2013 at 6:13 pm #35299
Thank you Guy for your tips. It helps to know what works for others with the same struggle. I am inspired to know that you’ve made it through the tough times and I am going to run or do a physical activity the next time I feel like watching TV. :). those numbers are shocking when compiled and I do not want to spend my life distracting! I am going to make this commitment to myself to make changes, I have noticed I have been doing the same things daily as I did when I smoked pot, so of course it feels weird to be alone and not high, I need to be doing different things. Thank you so much you are helping me realize truths. I feel focused on the amount of time I’m spending on feeling down but really it has only been a short amount of time I’ve been sober a little over a month, I am going to give this time and work on it like anything worth while. Ourselves should be the most worthwhile project.May 8, 2013 at 6:04 pm #35298
I am new to taking anxiety medication as well as starting to deal with obstacles. -Which i am learning to look at as lessons. I greatly appreciate all three of you reaching out to me, I felt overwhelmed with tears to see that others can see how to move forward because sometimes i feel blind to my path. I will definitely look at all of the links you’ve recommended and practices. Carlos, Energy psych is a new term which is a little exciting to me to start to learn about. And emotional freedom technique sounds like something that will help me, i will practice these things ive promised myself, just like ive practiced negative things over the last 23 years of my life. Katerina I have definitely changed my diet and I am reassured to hear that diet can help with mood, thank you! Marilyn, i think self love will be the key to starting to change my life. Thank you my helpers! I am listening to a podcast by tara brach right now, which I realize… Is me not fully living in the tara brach listening moment because I’m also on this website. I am noticing these things about myself and I am excited for the day I feel fully mindful and in the moment.May 7, 2013 at 8:11 pm #35237
you know, i used to think oh coorporations make a ton of money so why does it matter about theft, i could find a million reasons to justify why its okay to do. but now really it is a scary thing to be at the mercy of others such as police or your parents so the best thing to do is not make decisions that will let others affect you. You are a wonderful writer on here and in touch with yourself enough to reach out to others because you recognize that this was a problem that made you feel bad. Many people possibly some of these people are your friends, are not in touch with themselves enough to realize that stealing just feels negative even though some may “get away with it”. it is better to build your life with things that you set goals to reach, you feel much happier in the long run and it is not just instant gratification. the best things in life are worth working hard for. i am learning this myself. i am 23 and my younger sister has been caught stealing as well as one of my best friends. my friend was tackled at walmart by a store worker (which is illegal im pretty sure) for stealing nail polish. people who work these jobs probably are unhapy with their lives and will say things to make you feel as bad as them. dont let anyone shame you just take this as a learning opportunity. perhaps you would have gotten away with it and tried to steal again with your friends and maybe the consequences would have been much worse. it is okay we all make mistakes 🙂May 7, 2013 at 8:03 pm #35236
I am so uncomfortable with feeling sadness, i cry and it causes physical tightness in my chest, and stomach acid buildup which very recently is causing ulcer symptoms. I am fearful of dealing with my sadness and anger because it causes physical things to happen. i am 23 and i so wish i was 75 to know that i can make it through this time in my life. ive lost 14 pounds without trying to this month and have started seeing a counselor weekly. i am waiting for that peaceful day in my life when i do not cry or feel anxious. it has been a full month of crying and stress. i do not know what to do. 🙁 i distract by watching tv and i used to be an avid marijuana smoker until about 40 days ago. I have had stress dreams and i am just so tired and feel hopeless. your stories are inspiring but the inspiration feels so fleeting and unattainable for me.May 7, 2013 at 7:55 pm #35235
Thank you. I find obstacles were always obstacles, now i am truly working to see them as opportunities. My dog got into a fight with another dog today, but this was an opportunity to learn that i need to keep my dog away from others because she could have harmed another dog horribly but instead she didnt and now i know better. This was horribly upsetting at first, and i still feel alittle anxious about it but i cannot control this matter and i need to be self loving instead of self blaming.May 7, 2013 at 7:22 pm #35233
I am 23 and have not really developed coping skills. When typing that I’m wondering if what I’m talking about is truly a skill that I desire. I have been feeling untouchable like I could never get sick or never be hurt, I could drink alcohol or numb away things that were stressors. Now that I am dealing with some unknown pain and spending a lot of time at the doctor I am trying to give myself love but I give myself negative thoughts which end up hurting me and causing stress and physical pain. How can i find the path to self love when i am worried about things i cannot control. I think i want peace but I keep thinking regret, anger towards my parents for abandoning me when i was 16 because they were on drugs.. i feel worried about my landlord kicking me out because i have a pitbull i didnt tell her about but i didnt have a place to live that allowed pitbulls and couldnt imagine abandoning my dog the one whose shown me unconditional love.May 7, 2013 at 5:02 pm #35231
I believe you do have hope inside of you. You have hope enough that you wrote this post and we want to help you. I think you are strong enough do what you hope to accomplish with new business. What is your culture? Is dating something you are wanting in your life right now? I believe you can have a distant yet loving daily relationship with your family but sometimes things will happen when you are close around family that can trigger old emotions. That is okay, it is okay to have bad sometimes because without the bad we cannot have the good. If you find after trying that you are unable to deal with some things then give yourself permission to separate yourself from those negative things.
My mother abandoned me to take care of my 12 year old sister when I was 16 because she was addicted to drugs. My father has been in and out of jail and i do not have a relationship with him. I find now that when I am around my mother who is fully better and not on drugs now that I am angry sometimes. I was very sick recently and all i wanted was a hug, but I didnt get that from her. I do know that I am happy my mother is alive and I realize that she can’t really care for me if she cant care for herself. I think parents are just people sometimes and will never be a parent. I hope that you can see the people inside of your parents and not the icky relationship skills or communication skills they used to raise you. You are wonderfully smart, a great writer on here and in touch with your emotions. You are gifted because you are in touch with yourself, something your parents werent able to accomplish within themselves. You are an amazing strong being.May 7, 2013 at 4:52 pm #35230
I worry to be sick or hurt while being alive.May 7, 2013 at 4:50 pm #35228
I am curious, what is a specific example of something you’ve done that you would like approval on? and what would those words sound like coming from the person you would like approval from?
recently i was worried something was wrong with my lungs so worried i felt paralyzed. my counselor put two chairs in a room and had me sit in one, and then i had to get up and sit in the other and pretend to be my lungs.
that conversation was very interesting i must say. I am 23 and this was a new concept to me. .. So If you could imagine that conversation for me and type it here, I would really like to try and help you.
I have not really had parents to be proud of me for getting good grades, being nice to others, accomplishing goals or getting a job. I do know how good it feels to reach a goal that I’ve worked hard for. or to give a compliment to someone else. Sometimes if i do to others long enough what i hope others do to me.. sometimes it comes to fruition, but many times it doesnt because i feel many people that I am not close with are very consumed by their lives as well and do not see that I need something from them.
something else that helps me is to remind myself.. that I am inside a giant bubble (ozone), floating on a rock in space . I feel small but I also feel the same size as all other humans inside the bubble. so we are all equals in that moment of visualization for me.