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Posts tagged with “stress”

How We Create Problems for Ourselves (And How to Stop)

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“If you think you’re enlightened, go spend a week with your family.” ~Ram Dass

I just returned from a four-day trip with my family. It was my own family of four (my husband and two kids), plus my mom, my two sisters, and my brother-in-law.

It was great. We get along well and have fun together.

And, it was four days with family.

It’s a funny thing…although you grow up with your siblings, listening to and being influenced by your parents, you all end up so unique—different from each other and different from the adults who raised you.…

5 Steps to Change Your Perspective and Overcome Your Challenges

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“Look again at that dot. That’s here. That’s home. That’s us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives.” ~Carl Sagan

I’m there with a hundred other people. The lights fade to a whisper then vanish, leaving us in darkness. Stars appear. Thousands of them, projected onto the dome screen above.

In the center of the screen is Earth with its emerald and amber lands and sapphire oceans frosted by clouds. We watch the planet’s rotation, and then we’re flying backward through space, and the …

Overcoming Fear-Based Thinking and Creating a Happy Mind and Life

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“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” ~George Addair

My parents were teenagers when they had their first of three children. I was the middle child. They were uneducated, poor, and had very difficult upbringings.

As I recall my childhood, most of what I remember is how fearful both of my parents were.

They were constantly stressed out about money, the kids, the tattered house, the rusty car, and everything else in their lives.

My mother, my first role model, was so scared of the world. She definitely had an undiagnosed anxiety disorder. She was afraid to …

7 Habits That Keep You Strong (Even When Things Go Wrong)

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“I’m stronger because of the hard times, wiser because of my mistakes, and happier because I have known sadness.” ~Unknown

It’s happened to most of us.

Despite our best intentions, something goes dreadfully wrong.

You suffer a heartbreaking loss, make a terrible mistake, or get blindsided by an injury.

In disbelief your mind cries, “Wait. What?”

And then, “No, no, no, this can’t be happening.”

After the initial shock, when the surge of stress hormones has subsided, you realize that yes, this is happening.

And you can’t help thinking: “But how could this happen? It’s not fair. I can’t bear …

What to Do When You’re Panicking Because You Can’t Make a Decision

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“No one saves us but ourselves. We alone must walk the path.” ~Buddha

I got a frantic message from a friend last night.

Everything was going wrong—her job, her relationship, her life—and she didn’t know what to do.

“Help me, please,” she kept saying. “I don’t know what to do.”

I tried hard to stifle a giggle. I know, completely inappropriate. But I found it really funny.

Why? Because I’m the last person anyone should be asking for advice. If I knew what to do, if I knew how to help her, I’d have:

  1. implemented this a long time ago
…

How to Maintain Peace and Joy Despite Your Everyday Struggles

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“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.” ~Deepak Chopra

For years I allowed everyday struggles, like slight disturbances from schedule, to steal my happiness, peace, and energy. Whenever something disrupted my plan, I got negative and started complaining.

When I realized this, I began taking steps to accept the daily chaos. I shifted my focus to how I percieve my daily life and how I spend the twenty-four hours I get.

I started asking questions, like: Am I being positive? Am I spending my hours in a way that’s productive yet joyful?

And I began …

Spend Time with People Who Bring Out the Best in You

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How to Cope and Keep Going When Times Get Tough

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“If you’re going through hell, keep going.” ~Winston Churchill

The day started out beautifully. My friends Shaun, Tina, and I decided to take advantage of a sunny Saturday afternoon with a hike along Ontario’s Bruce Trail. We parked our cars at the trail access, laced up our boots, and headed out for a day of wandering through sun-dappled fields and forests.

A couple hours later, we agreed we had probably gone far enough and turned around to head back.

That’s when the weather changed. Fast. Ominous clouds rolled in, blotting out the blue skies we had been enjoying. The trees …

You Must Learn to Let Go

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Let Go of Your Unhelpful Story: Accept, Surrender, and Move On

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“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.” ~Eckhart Tolle

I recently discovered just how powerful our thoughts can be. I learned that it doesn’t take time for us to accept our current situation; it simply takes a shift in our perceptions and a change in the stories we tell ourselves.

The catalyst for this realization was sent to me, in a small envelope placed under the windscreen wipers of my car. Yes, it came in the form of a parking ticket.

At first I was shocked and quite disappointed in myself for getting …

How to Stay Calm in Frustrating Situations (Even if You Have Zero Patience)

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“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” ~Buddha

Uh-oh, you did it again.

You fell into the same trap as last week.

Perhaps someone was driving in front of you going 20 in a 55 mph zone, or maybe you received terrible customer service and couldn’t get your refund.

So you snapped and lost your temper.

Whatever the reason for your explosive reaction, you haven’t yet found a way to keep control and remain calm.

Becoming impatient and losing your temper…

Get Mindful in May and Pause for a Great Cause

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When your mind is scattered, your head full of worries, and your heart full of fears and doubts, the world is a stressful, sometimes terrifying place.

When you take time to clear your mental space, suddenly everything feels easier. Without the heavy burden of anxiety and rumination, you’re free to simply be—and to see.

It’s like cleaning a dirty window; all of a sudden, the light comes in, light you didn’t even realize was there.

What provides this cleaning, clarifying magic? Meditation, and even just ten minutes a day.

My whole life transformed when I learned that I could free …

Release Stress Through Mindfulness: 4 Steps to Emotional Freedom

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“The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.” ~William James

I’ve been meditating for many years, but there are still days when I feel like it’s something I need to tick off my to-do list.

On some days, particularly when I’m in the middle of a big project, it can feel hard to put even ten minutes aside for meditating. The driven voice in my head tries to convince me that this practice of pausing and connecting with presence is a waste of time.

It’s a compelling voice, particularly on days when it feels …

Freeing Yourself from Fear: 4 Lessons from Anxiety

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“The only journey is the one within.” ~Rainer Maria Rilke

Out of nowhere, my heart starts to speed up. I can’t get a deep breath; it feels like I’m slowly suffocating.

My throat and chest start to hurt, I suddenly feel weak, and my thoughts race through my mind. A desperate feeling comes over me. I lose control, can’t think straight, and can’t stop shaking. I feel restless and don’t know what to do to feel better. And suddenly, this feeling fades away.

Afterward, I feel a little depressed, confused, and tired. Sometimes I cry; sometimes I just sit on …

Stop Feeling Frazzled: A Powerful Guide to Reducing Stress (and a Giveaway!)

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Update – The winners for this giveaway have been chosen:

In my high school yearbook’s class prophecy, it was predicted that I would one day write and star in a one-woman show about my life called “Stress.”

I was chronically frazzled—in a constant state of panic about everything I had to do and had already done but may not have done well enough.

I overextended myself, took very little time to nurture my emotional and mental well-being, and frequently felt like I was about to snap.

In fact, I even broke a stress ball once from excessive …

Stop Pushing Yourself: 10 Crucial Steps to Avoid Burnout

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“I actually think burnout is the wrong description of it. I think it’s ‘burn up.’ Physiologically, that is what you are doing because of the chronic stress being placed on your body.” ~Richard Boyatzis

Some years ago, when my mother told me that a friend of hers had experienced burnout, I didn’t really listen. Actually, I didn’t want to hear about it. I even felt irritated because she felt sorry for people who got burned out.

My opinion was that they were just being ridiculous and exaggerating.

It was an excuse, supported by a medical certificate from some doctor they …

3 Things I Did to Relax When I Was Stressing About Reaching My Goals

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“Every day brings a choice: to practice stress or to practice peace.” ~Joan Borysenko

Stress and my own expectations were killing me. I was taking care of my physical health with exercise four to five days a week, eating right with lots of plants and vegetables, and sleeping enough, but my health was getting bad.

I had IBS that was getting worse, and I wasn’t sleeping well (even though I spent enough hours in bed). In other words, I was doing everything right, or rather, all the external physical stuff right.

I was doing something that virtually everyone agreed was …

6 Tips to Stay in the Now During Busy Times

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“If we are not fully ourselves, truly in the present moment, we miss everything.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Have you ever had one of those days where you catch yourself rushing and not paying attention to the present moment?

I had one of those days a few years ago.

I had just ordered some coffee at a drive-thru and was waiting for the clerk to open the window.

While I waited, I began plotting my plan of attack for running several personal errands. My to-do list was long, and I knew I was going to need to be efficient if I …

Connecting with Your Peaceful Self to Overcome Fears and Worries

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“Fear: False Evidence Appearing Real.” ~Unknown

It was an ordinary school morning in a busy European city. I seem to recall it was spring, as my memories store the feeling of awakening after a long winter.

I was seventeen and getting ready to go to school. Following my standard morning routine, which included eating my meticulously assembled breakfast, I walked to the tram station.

The city I lived in at the time was situated in a beautiful valley, and the tram ride offered a trip to the hub of the city. My high school was downtown in the historical part …

How to Listen to Your Body (and Become Happy Again)

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“Keeping your body healthy is an expression of gratitude to the whole cosmos—the trees, the clouds, everything.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

It’s embarrassing, isn’t it?

You don’t want to make a fuss about tiny health annoyances.

But you feel lethargic for no apparent reason. You get constipated, especially when you travel. You have difficulty sleeping.  And your hormones are all over the place.  You hold onto that niggly five or ten pounds like your life depends on it.

Sound familiar? I’ve been there too.

I was working at a dream job and living on the French Riveria. I was paid …