Posts tagged with “wisdom”
How to Make Sense of the Anxiety That Comes with Being a Parent
“You must first teach a child he is loved. Only then is he ready to learn everything else.” ~Amanda Morgan
If I had a nickel for every parent who asked me, “So, if we do (…insert a strategy they have been given…), can we know for sure that he won’t have to deal with (…insert list of problems here …) when he grows up?”
Sadly, there are no nickels for hearing the question, nor guarantees to offer anxious parent. In fact, parental anxiety exists largely because life has no guarantees.
Nevertheless, the question in itself is worth considering.
So let’s …
How I Found the Courage to Leave an Abusive Relationship
“Do something today that your future self will thank you for.” ~Unknown
My whole life has been filled with toxic and abusive relationships, starting with extreme physical and emotional abuse from my parents, right up to the last relationship that I left in 2013. Abuse—physical, sexual, emotional, and verbal—is all I’ve ever known.
My entire life. I knew it wasn’t normal.
I desperately wanted to be loved, appreciated, and respected. I desperately wanted ‘normal,’ whatever that was. I longed for a fairy tale romance. I longed for happiness and peace. I just wasn’t convinced I would ever have that.
And …
Dear Estranged Adult: You Are Strong and Worthy of Love
Dear estranged adult,
What I want you to remember is that it was never really about you, although it might have felt like it at the time and it might feel that way now.
When your parents told you over and over you weren’t good enough, that you would never amount to anything, they were just projecting their own feeling about themselves on to you because deep down, they do not feel they are good enough and don’t believe they have amounted to anything.
Maybe these feelings were passed down from their parents, or maybe your parents have regrets about …
6 Simple Acts to Make the World a Better Place
“The great use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it.” ~William James
I’ll never forget the call.
It was 1989 and, like most college students, I spent winter break in Florida looking for some sun. Stepping off the airplane and being greeted by a burst of warm air was the best. As I entered the terminal, I had the added benefit of being greeted by my maternal grandparents, who lived in North Miami Beach.
Lounging at the pool, going on walks with them, or eating out, the experience was a wonderful way to decompress after …
Healing from Abuse and Reclaiming My Dreams
TRIGGER WARNING: This post mentions sexual abuse and may be triggering to some people.
“Along the way I stopped into a coffee shop. All around me normal, everyday city types were going about their normal, everyday affairs…In spite of which—or, rather, all the more because— here I was, sitting in this coffee shop, drinking my coffee, feeling a desperate loneliness. I alone was the outsider. I had no place here… Here I had no ties to anyone. Fact is, I’d come to reclaim myself.” ~Haruki Murakami
“You don’t have any goals.”
“I wondered why someone your age and …
Instead of Fearing Change, Get Excited About Progress
“Progress is impossible without change.” ~Walt Disney
I want you to look in the mirror and tell me what you see.
Do you look older? Does your skin have more wrinkles? Do you notice dark circles around your eyes or white hair on your head?
You are looking at massive changes from a decade ago. A lot of it you probably don’t like—changes due to your body growing older. Changes that you cannot resist.
Now look in the mirror again. Do you notice a more confident person? Someone who is self-assured, optimistic, and happy in life?
It happened to me …
How to Love Yourself and Break Your Relationship Patterns
“And still, after all this time, the Sun has never said to the Earth, ‘You owe me.’ Look what happens with a love like that. It lights up the sky.” ~Rumi
I grew up believing love was conditional. My grandmother, as much as I adored her, was extremely controlling, and unless I met her high standards of behavior and gave her a certain level of attention, she treated me with coldness.
Whenever she disapproved of my behavior, she would tell me, “I love you, but I don’t like you.” As if she had a switch she could turn on and …
Why Chasing Happiness Won’t Make You Happy
“Happiness is like a butterfly, the more you chase it, the more it will evade you, but if you notice the other things around you, it will gently come and sit on your shoulder.” ~Henry David Thoreau
Most of us are always on the lookout for a big breakthrough—a point in our life where the beam balance tips to maximal happiness so we can enjoy everlasting bliss. What can we do to get there?
Our pursuit of happiness is like a coyote chasing a roadrunner. But what happens? Just like the roadrunner, happiness slips out of our hands every …
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 