A lone wolf.

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This topic contains 48 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by  anita 4 days, 17 hours ago.

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    Dear Anita,

    The Christmas light switch on sounds wonderful (: I love how people got into the Christmas spirit!

    Today I actually had a rather productive day although I am finding that I am very much keeping myself busy. I think in terms of my ex it will be hard to get over him and its a misconception that because I ended it I must be going around happy-as-larry when in reality I am upset that he isn’t in my life anymore.

    However, I have asked if we could be friends, so further down the line he may come back into my life and I will hopefully going to be in a better place.

    In terms of my parents the silence can’t last too long as it’s my dad’s birthday this week and therefore there should be a text about meeting up to celebrate it. But I will deal with that on the day.

    Thank you for the time and effort you have put into replying back to me.

    – V



    Dear Victoria:

    You are welcome. I am glad to  read that you felt  better  yesterday and  hope today  as well. Keep doing  what works for you. I hope to read  about the expected contact with your mother regarding  your father’s birthday. (At some time in the future, you could  celebrate your father’s birthday away from your mother, meeting  him at a restaurant, if you so chose).




    Hi there,

    So as an update I needed to get in touch with them to wish my father a happy birthday. I am currently in some financial difficulty so I asked them for help although that has been ignored. I tried to buy them presents for christmas but my heart isn’t in it as it were, I just feel angry and sad.

    I spoke to my ex and thankfully he is aware that I still love him, so that’s good, and he has said that I can message him and ask him how he is now and again. Because having completely no contact seems alien and at the end of the day we have always had a good friendship so I do still want him as part of my life.

    However, there are a few things that I don’t understand or at least question.

    • He wants me to fight for him yet with this break up he has just gone “ok, well I guess my future plans are changing”, I just thought there mightve been more of a “why? are you sure?” because really this break up isn’t because I don’t care about him its just theres a few things that aren’t going to change anytime soon and I dont want to wait any longer (one of them diy…yet now I have broken things off all of a sudden he is productive doing DIY?!) and because some of his life choices are making me feel second best.
    • I think I just need to be patient.

    I have noticed that my anxiety has decreased, but I am suddenly finding myself at the beginning of a long and rocky road on my own. So over the next month I will be trying to patch up my life.

    I don’t want financial help from my family, it’s just frustrating that they could make their daughter happier or life less stressful, and they have chosen to only do that under a list of conditions, which I am not willing to follow because then I really will be miserable.

    If there are any comments this weekend that put-me-down I am going to start to distance myself because I don’t deserve that.

    What are your Christmas plans?

    – V



    Dear  Victoria:

    My Christmas plans is to survive  the  cold (below freezing lately) by  keeping the woodstove going, bringing  wood in every day, one  of my daily task. I will attend  a Christmas party in a week, it’s been a  long time  since I  attended a party. (Last party I regretfully consumed vast amounts of melted  chocolate; nothing like  melted  chocolate…)

    Did I understand  correctly: you can make it without financial help from your parents?

    I believe  you made the right decision, ending the relationship with your  now ex  boyfriend. Here  is the  evidence  that it is the correct decision: “I have noticed that my anxiety has  decreased, but I am suddenly finding  myself at  the beginning  of a long and rocky road  on my own”-

    1. your anxiety has  decreased.

    2. You are at the beginning of a  long and rocky road.

    I hope you focus on that long and rocky road. I think that your ex boyfriend, for whatever reason, was a distraction from that road.

    I will be back in about  fifteen hours. Take good care of yourself!




    • This reply was modified 4 days, 17 hours ago by  anita.
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