Dear Lindsey:

I think that his response was fine, given that he is busy at work. It’s understandable that his response was not complete. What’s missing in his response is the part where he tells you that he will no longer call you- or your behavior- strange.

“I just feel like something is missing and I can’t put my finger on it” – I think that what’ missing (I am getting deep here,  so bear with me) is within you: the feeling that everything is okay, that life is, or is just about to become beautiful and wonderful forevermore… that long gone feeling we once had as children, at times (?)

It was missing in me until I figured it will always be missing because it’s a childhood fantasy and I can’t bring that feeling back.

anita

Dear Lindsey:

“I don’t think he is the type to apologize very much” – I don’t blame him for not apologizing VERY MUCH because there are women who get hooked on a man’s apologies, never satisfied for long,  ending up with a perpetually apologizing man and a chronically dissatisfied woman– a miserable life for him… and for her.

Jason sounds to me like a pretty cool guy, for a real guy (not  a Fantasy guy)!

anita

Dear Lindsey:

He is a cool guy, and you are a cool gal, so… you’re both cool! I hope you like the book. Please let me know what you get out of it, after you read some of it.

anita

Dear Lindsey:

Happy Tuesday  back to you. I googled the title of the book, the complete title is “Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess” (cleaning up is in small print). Here is a quote I like: “You cannot defeat darkness by running from it, nor can you conquer your inner demons by hiding them from the world. In order to defeat the darkness, you must bring it into the light” – she repeatedly states (judging by other quotes I read) that understanding the cause/ origin of our anxiety and depression and what’s the message behind them (bringing them into the light) is needed if we are to lessen and manage both.

“So far it’s about retraining your brain- the interesting part is that the thoughts we have are not termed as ‘faulty’ or ‘negative.’ They are just thoughts” – yes, it is very important to not judge our thoughts or feelings as being good or bad, right or wrong. It is the judging of what we often can’t control (thoughts just happen, feelings just happen) that cause us a lot of distress.

“I also got an anxiety coloring book and it’s been useful” – yes, I’ve seen people coloring as a way to calm anxiety/ stress.

Good thing you are feeling  better with Lexapro and that your hands stopped shaking!

“Eventually the thick paint has completely covered the canvas. That’s what the Lexapro seems to be doing.  Jason stated he can tell I seem more relaxed in general. The downside (which I remember) is that when things feel less…intense… so do aspects of intimacy.  Currently this side effect seems minor based on how much better I am feeling” –

– by the thick paint imagery in regard to what Lexapro does for you, I understand that you mean that it covers your unwanted tension (anxiety, panic, worry) like thick paint covers canvas, muting your unwanted tensions; but in the past Lexapro, like thick paint, also covered and muted your wanted tension (sexual tension)?

anita

Dear Lindsey:

How about the muting of unwanted tension, on a scale of 1-10?

anita

Dear Lindsey:

Then Lexapro is a definite winner, muting unwanted tension 10 out of ten vs muting wanted tension 5 out of 10!

anita