- This topic has 14 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 2 months, 1 week ago by Lost1Flow.
March 21, 2023 at 6:08 am #416509
Just curious how the vast majority of people find joy in their lives, when the bulk of most days are just spent with routine obligations. For instance, work, household chores, family obligations/caregiving, errands, etc. Maybe if one can carve out an hour of time each day for something they enjoy, how is that worth it when the rest of the time just sucks? Throw in additional obstacles like chronic illness, making even the daily slug exhausting, and once that hour comes, just too tired to even enjoy it? Or even know how to properly spend it? I’m sure this sounds like depression, but it seems pretty rationale to think the balance is just so far off it makes sense to feel this way…March 21, 2023 at 7:57 am #416511PeterParticipant
Good question Lost One Flow
Came across a book when I was much younger titled ‘Surprised by Joy’. I’ve always liked that title. It hasn’t been my experience that one can ‘find’ joy, seek it out as if it was a something that you could hold onto. My experience of it is that its a something that happens and surprises, the surprise part of the experience of joy.
This morning I was at a yoga class. Everyone moving from flow to flow of the routine similar to the other mornings. Anyway during the class I catch a glimpse in the mirror of everyone bending and twisting, and could help but wonder of the absurdity of it… but then also a kind of beauty of everyone showing up, struggling through, sometimes if just a moment flowing through. In that absurdity of the moment I was surprised by joy.
Each of us it turns out have questioned the sanity of getting up at that early hour, especially those days when we arn’t feeling our best and if asked what is the point couldn’t answer. But you show up, engage with the moment, with life as it is, in all its routine absurd struggle and sometimes surprised by the wonder of it and in the wonder joy?
Like a yoga class life will find you twisted up in routine of work and family obligations.. but maybe if one creates the space for it, will glance in the mirror and noting the absurdity of all our striving also see the beauty and be surprised by joy.
I wonder Lost1Flow if the answer to your question is in your avatar name – Create some space within and find the flow.March 21, 2023 at 8:28 am #416513
Thank you, Peter! I will look for that book 🙂 It’s interesting you mention the element of surprise, as I’ve come across that theme by various other authors like Joe Dispenza, who tell us to let go for the surprises as well. Much wisdom there it seems! I love that you have the yoga class routine. Perhaps that’s something I need to return to as well, for that community feel. Thank you again for your words and inspiration 🙂March 21, 2023 at 10:02 am #416516PeterParticipant
Thanks for your story and reminding me/us Lost1Flow that if we can create even just a small space to flow that surprises can happen.
I wish you well as you re-engage with your flow. 🙂
Stillness is what creates love,
Movement is what creates life,
To be still, Yet still moving
– That is everything! – Do Hyun Choe
Movement is time, stillness is eternity. Realizing the relationship of the temporal moment to the eternal—not moment, but forever—is the sense of life. Realizing how this moment in your life is actually a moment of eternity. (Love) – Joseph CampbellMarch 21, 2023 at 1:49 pm #416519
What beautiful quotes! Thank you for sharing as well!March 22, 2023 at 1:20 am #416582
good to hear from you again!
Throw in additional obstacles like chronic illness, making even the daily slug exhausting, and once that hour comes, just too tired to even enjoy it?
I sometimes feel the same, because I too suffer from health problems that are turning chronic, and it’s hard to accept that I can’t do things that used to give me joy.
But I think that perhaps you’re feeling down and hopeless also because of the circumstances you live in, which you were talking about in your previous thread. This is what you said then:
My life is just such a sad existence of going to work, dealing with them, and being too exhausted for much else.
You were completely dedicated you helping your mother take care of your sick father and grandmother. And you felt it’s impossible for you to get out of that circle.
How is it now? Have things moved in any direction?March 22, 2023 at 3:32 am #416586RobertaParticipant
Dear Lost 1Flow
Just this morning I came across this beautiful book “present moment, wonderful moment” by thich nhat hanh and just reading a few pages on lifting the most mundane of actions to something sacred. This book will no longer languish on my bookshelf but will become my companion throughout the day. My current bedtime reading is sacred rest which I am also finding immensely helpful.
I hope you find something to uplift you.March 22, 2023 at 3:40 am #416587
Hi Tee, wow, you have an amazing memory 🙂 Unfortunately no, things are all status quo as far as all that goes. So I’ve been trying to just put myself in a different place mentally, with more meditating and reading in btwn when I can. But now and again I just fall back into that deep dark mode, like yesterday when I wrote this thread.
Hi Roberta, thank you so much for the book recommendations! I love Thich Nhat Hanh. I totally agree, reading even a short passage can be so uplifting.
Thank you all to this beautiful community for all the love and support 🙂March 22, 2023 at 10:00 am #416602
Hi Tee, wow, you have an amazing memory
Hehe, I did remember your story, but also, clicking on your previous thread helped refresh my memory 🙂
I am sorry it’s still the status quo regarding your family situation…
Maybe if one can carve out an hour of time each day for something they enjoy, how is that worth it when the rest of the time just sucks?
I think carving out one hour in a day is still better than nothing, because you’re doing something just for yourself, you’re nurturing your soul. You’re also setting the foundation for something to come, maybe not so soon, but still, making it a possibility, not giving it up. Perhaps one hour can grow into 1 hour 10 minutes, then 1,5 hours, then 2 hours… who knows.
So in short, don’t give up on that 1 hour, because you are 1) nurturing yourself during that time and 2) giving it a chance to grow and expand…
Wishing you all the best, Lost1Flow, and thank you for being here! <3March 22, 2023 at 4:27 pm #416613
Thank you, Tee! You’re so right, an hour for now can still be worthwhile soul nurturing as you said 🙂March 22, 2023 at 11:56 pm #416614
You’re welcome, Lost1Flow!
I am also thinking that it might help if you spend that one hour outside of home, e.g. at a yoga class (or whatever activity you like), but most importantly, among people. You don’t have to do it daily, but at least once a week, I would go to a community type of event.
Because right now you’re tied to your home and the sickness and depression you’re seeing there. So if you can get out of that atmosphere for even a short while, it might help you cope better.March 23, 2023 at 6:52 am #416617RobertaParticipant
I dont know if you have access to an outside space where you live – we have a small courtyard and over the last few months I have put a small bench which has flower containers as part of it. I enjoy swapping out seasonal plants and have bird feeders I find it a mini paradise where I can relax & recharge my batteries, plus I can see the courtyard from kitchen& dining room so even in inclement weather it still lifts my spirits. Even indoors a small corner nicely set out can help give a few moments of respite respite I have a small zen garden that I enjoy playing with.
Best wishesMarch 23, 2023 at 9:46 am #416625
Thank you Roberta & Tee! Much agreed 🙂 I need to get back into community things, and being outside is so important too! I have a little windowsill garden that does bring much joy, small as it is.
Again many thank to all for the reminders that the small things really are the big things to focus on 🙂March 23, 2023 at 3:09 pm #416634TheItFactorParticipant
what a great question! For me personally, joy comes mostly from interacting with people and fostering relationships, sharing things with my loved ones and creating experiences. There are things I enjoy on my own, cooking and gym, for example but sharing those meals brings so much more meaning. It really is simple in the end (I think), today I am making dinner for one of my best friends, might be able to squeeze a workout in and that’s it. Hopefully will make for a good sleep. They say chasing happiness prevents experiencing it, there is perhaps something to it. I think what Peter and Roberta said hits the nail on the head, small things matter, we all go through the motions.March 24, 2023 at 8:26 am #416648
Thank you, TheItFactor! It’s comforting to hear others feelings on this topic. The collective wisdom is just the inspiration needed at moments when it’s all a struggle. Will keep up the joy in the small things 🙂