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Family Drama/toxic relationships

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  • #444015
    Arie1276
    Participant

    Hi Anita ,

    I have not posted in such a long time. I posted a lot under Fake friend/or jealous friend in the past.
    Current situation: My family and I still do not speak to my sister n laws sister Amy and her bf.
    My brother continues to favor her bf and not my husband . It still causes alot of family friction.
    Easter is coming up. My brother told my mom that he will be having Easter dinner at his home and Amy and her bf will be there because my brother and his wife want everyone there. I still did not get a phone call or an invite yet. Even though my mom said my brother will be texting me about it when it gets closer. He told my parents to get over what happened and well my mom blew up at him big time. She said if they ignore my parents or don’t say hi then my parents will leave. I am on the fence about going but it is a holiday. My husband hates the guy. And my kids will not be there. I will go only if my brother asks me.
    Last fall in 2024, Amy’s bf was drunk and driving down a road and a car was trying to pass him. Amy’s bf pulled a gun on the driver in the other car and threatened to shoot him for passing . Cops were called and the other guy in the car decided to drop the charges, and the cop never showed up to the bearing and Amy’s bf walked free. I got into an argument with my brother over it because I was pissed that my brother chooses to hang around with a potential felon and he still does not try to get to know my husband. He still ignores my husband. The whole situation makes me so angry and frustrated. I just don’t know what to do anymore. We try to make plans with my brother and his wife and when we do , they don’t talk much like they do when they are around Amy and her bf. I feel like throwing my hands in the air and just say to hell with trying .

    #444016
    Roberta
    Participant

    Dear Ariel1276
    I am sorry that things have not improved with your interfamily relationships.
    “I feel like throwing my hands in the air and just say to hell with trying.” – Mentally run thru this in two ways 1) All guns blazing vomiting out all the anger & hurt. 2) in a gentle wise compassionate way ( it is okay to feel sad) . Then see how these different ways make you feel emotionally, physically & mentally.
    Life is too short & unpredictable to hold grudges, death is just a breath away. Live each moment with as much peace, joy, dignity & compassion & gratitude. We only have control over our own motives, decisions & behaviour.
    Kind regards
    Roberta

    #444019
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Arie: I will read and reply tomorrow morning.
    Anita

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