Dear Nichole:

I didn’t know you started taking Zoloft and Xanax. Not together, did you? Zoloft tends to have a stimulating affect, like coffee and should be taken in the morning, first thing, not in the evening?

(Don’t worry about not reading my posts to you attentively, you can read them later).

anita

Dear Nichole:

Sertraline and Zoloft is the same drug, both names were on the bottle when it was prescribed for me. Sertraline has a stimulating affect, one side effect is tremors, I think (you can google that). Do not take it at bedtime!

How long ago did you start the two and did you take Xanax by itself, without the Zoloft, if so, how did it feel to you?

anita

Dear Nichole:

Yes, Sertraline first thing in the morning, not at bedtime. I feel certain of it because I took it for 16 years and this is what my psychiatrist told me. You can ask yours as well as other pharmacists. I just googled its side effects and tremors or shaking as well as insomnia are listed as side effects. In Wikipedia  it reads: “Compared to other SSRIs, sertraline tends to be associated with a higher rate of psychiatric side effects… It tends to be more activating (that is, associated with a higher rate of anxiety, agitation, insomnia, etc.) than other SSRIs”.

Regarding “So not fair!”- tell me more about what you mean by it, if you want.

anita

Dear Nichole:

What is for sure is that you shouldn’t be taking sertraline in the morning!

Regarding it not being fair, yes, I understand. It wasn’t fair and isn’t fair. Is there anything you can do to make it fair?

anita

Dear Nichole:

If you take sertraline, then take it first thing in the morning, not later in the day.

Sure your codependency plays a role. Of course it does. Did you ever attend Coda meetings, in person?

anita

Dear Nichole:

Of course you are to blame in some instances, but even if you were perfect, you can’t have a healthy relationship with a woman who bad mouths her own son (your aunt), a man who sexually abused you for eight years when you were a child and never acknowledged it, never paid you the heavy duty restitution he owes you (your older brother), a man who will not acknowledge problems and acts like there is nothing wrong (your younger brother), nor was it or is it possible to have a healthy relationship with any of your parents who neglected you and weren’t there for you at all, almost entirely not there for you.

So, again, if you were perfect, a healthy relationship with any one of your family members is not possible.

anita

Dear Nichole:

My suggestions:

1. Don’t take Zoloft at bedtime anymore, take it first thing in the morning or not at all (and always follow a competent doctor’s instructions).

2. In the evening, take a long walk, a hot shower or bath,  yoga, listen to a relaxing guided meditation &/ relaxing music &/or any such activity to help you relax before bedtime.

3. Do not confront  any family member and stay away from them all.

4. Consider attending some kind of a support group in person so that you can spend time in the company of others who treat each other respectfully according to appropriate program guidelines, and/ or participate in a group activity such as a yoga class, so that you can be around people.

5. If you can, attend quality psychotherapy.

6. Think of moving on with your life not as a sister/ niece/ cousin etc., but as an individual. No longer see your value in your genetic affiliation.

7. Make today the first day of the rest of your life. Do not repeat established mistakes, experiment with new ideas and initiatives.

anita