Home→Forums→Emotional Mastery→how to deal with emotions?
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Helcat.
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May 27, 2023 at 5:51 am #419278
Roberta
ParticipantHi
The Richard Wagamese’s meditation is reminiscent of the feeling that I very occasionally would get when doing Tai Chi a flow, a connection harmony and balance , still, yet moving allowing everything nothing being rejected.
May 31, 2023 at 4:55 pm #419526Helcat
ParticipantHi Peter
The esoteric nature is what I love about the text too. I find that re-reading it over the years I always learn something new. Each time I’m a little older, a little wiser and see something I couldn’t see before.
The quote you mentioned reminded me of another text. This time a Buddhist one. I don’t remember the name. It actually contained curses. It was forbidden to share it because it could trigger enlightenment. It was reserved only for a select few. At the same time, it foresaw that many would be unable to understand it. Therefore sharing it would invite misfortune.
Amazingly somehow it found it’s way onto the internet translated into many languages!
My husband always says that if we were meant for enlightenment we would have been born monks.
Instead we have been given different lives and different challenges.
Wishing you all the best! 🙏
June 1, 2023 at 8:35 am #419536Peter
ParticipantEver wonder why the Buddha is most often pictured as laughing? Siddhartha on being ‘enlightened’ – lightened – I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment.” One does not have to be a monk to gain nothing 🙂
Something from Campbell, Myths of Light –
“D.T. Suzuki once remarked, “You know, they tell me when a baby is born, the baby cries. What does the baby say when the baby cries? The baby says, ‘Worlds above, worlds beneath—there is no one in the world like me’” . So, all babies are Buddhas! What’s the difference between Queen Maya’s baby and all the other babies? Siddhartha knew from the beginning that he was Buddha; all the other babies are caught in the illusion of materiality and the worlds of perception and sensation, but not him. Buddha means “The Awakened One” or “The Illuminated One,” and what brings one to illumination other than a deep, penetrating, attention to life, life exactly as it is, an attention to life that allows one to realize that the forces of nature, the pulse of the cosmos, course through and pulse in you, too. The nature of the Universe is your nature as well.”
June 1, 2023 at 8:48 am #419538Peter
ParticipantI was watching an episode of Yellowstone the other day where the main character made the following statement.
<p style=”text-align: left;”>“I spent all evening on the porch staring at mountains, listening to birds… Heart still empty. I take a shower to wash it away like dirt, but you can’t wash lonely off. So, I surrender to it. Best I can do is sleep through the lonely.”</p>
<p style=”text-align: left;”>“I can’t reflect at the end of the day. Evenings are for forgetting. But in the morning, I remember.”</p>
Something achingly sad about those words. An emptiness that isn’t empty, I feel and ‘know’ the words. (The emptiness experienced here is not the emptiness as suggested by the teachings of Buddha. We are not falling here but holding on… of course we fool ourselves believing were not falling.)After hearing those words my first thought was to wonder if ‘loneliness’ was an emotion or state of being? Probably both are true at the same time, yet I’m not sure I experience loneliness as an emotion. I am more likely to say that I feel sad because I’m lonely… In that context is sadness a distraction from looking at the experience of loneliness in the eye? I suspect I pretend I can rather wash lonely off then face loneliness .
On the topic how to deal with emotions I’m wondering how others experience and deal with loneliness
June 1, 2023 at 8:51 am #419539Peter
ParticipantReposted to remove the formatting and make it more readable – wish edits were allowed
I was watching an episode of Yellowstone the other day where the main character made the following statement.
“I spent all evening on the porch staring at mountains, listening to birds… Heart still empty. I take a shower to wash it away like dirt, but you can’t wash lonely off. So, I surrender to it. Best I can do is sleep through the lonely.”
“I can’t reflect at the end of the day. Evenings are for forgetting. But in the morning, I remember.”
Something achingly sad about those words. An emptiness that isn’t empty, I feel and ‘know’ the words. (The emptiness experienced here is not the emptiness as suggested by the teachings of Buddha. We are not falling here but holding on… of course we fool ourselves believing were not falling.)
After hearing those words my first thought was to wonder if ‘loneliness’ was an emotion or state of being? Probably both are true at the same time, yet I’m not sure I experience loneliness as an emotion. I am more likely to say that I feel sad because I’m lonely… In that context is sadness a distraction from looking at the experience of loneliness in the eye? I suspect I pretend I can rather wash lonely off then face loneliness .
On the topic how to deal with emotions I’m wondering how others experience and deal with loneliness
June 1, 2023 at 12:08 pm #419546Roberta
ParticipantHi
Some glitch with my laptop. So hope this post gets thru
Hello loneliness my old friend (Thich Nat Han) Knowing now that loneliness will arise and dissipate I just need patience/forbearance, where as many moons ago I would do something unskillful to alleviate the feeling and thus more often than not create some negative karma.
June 1, 2023 at 4:02 pm #419554Helcat
ParticipantHi Peter
Generally, I find that loneliness happens for a reason.
It’s a feeling that comes up when I have difficulties with a relationship. Resolving issues usually helps this one.
Another reason I’ve experienced is not accepting my situation. When I latch onto an idea of what my life should look like instead of appreciating how it is.
There is one other thing that I feel is important. Loving ourselves.
Have you ever noticed any triggers for loneliness?
June 2, 2023 at 7:01 am #419572Peter
ParticipantThere is wisdom in Thich Nat Han words, my own experience in the unskillful attempt to alleviate a feeling seldom made things better in the long run
The key word being skillful and as you point out Helcat noticing the triggers is a important part of that. Hire I’m thinking less on solving a problem as to the experience in the moment – “I spent all evening on the porch staring at mountains, listening to birds… Heart still empty” . In such a moment I don’t wish to run from it or in the moment fix it. Its very uncomfortable
The teachings talk a lot about emptiness being a important skill to cultivate. “The Heart still empty” isn’t the emptiness they point to but I suspect could be a doorway if one has courage. Is it not odd that what one hopes for is also what one fears? (Lots of wounded child in that)
July 7, 2023 at 3:15 pm #420730Helcat
ParticipantHi Peter
Sorry for the late reply. It’s been a unique time for me and I wasn’t in a place to process things emotionally.
There’s a lot of wisdom to be found in experiencing the moment.
I always felt that people are very much programmed by our experiences. I wonder if deprogramming is part of emptiness? Perhaps, not in the traditional meditation sense. But at some point our practices start to touch our lives.
I get the feeling that you’re a very courageous person Peter. How are you doing? I always enjoy talking with you.
Hopes and fears are complicated. Sometimes we are afraid things won’t be achieved. Sometimes things we hoped for aren’t appreciated once we attain them. I feel like vulnerability is key, the willingness to courageously experience things good and bad, without programming dictating behaviour. Perhaps a form of emptiness?
Wishing you all the best! 🙏
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