Dear Mr. A

What is the old saying? Turn around is fair play? If you put yourself in her shoes then you would understand that losing weight is not easy. Her body image in her mind is not the same as yours about her. And, I said if you want change then you must change. But, down to it, you don’t want this woman anymore. You want a fit woman who will bear you children. Looking at it from your point of view, divorce and pay her monthly alimony. Find another woman and pay for the new marriage with kids.

When I got married, I will not cheat on my wife and never leave her unless that will be what she wants. I try to remember affection and humor is the best medicine. I don’t push her. I want her happy not worrying about how life is going due to her husband’s demands. Well, to each their own.

I hope you find it in yourself to change your habits. Find that part of you that can inspire your wife to achieve your goals and make you happy. Good luck.

His is a male perspective too. Only his is rooted in what he wants, selfish needs. There must have been some attraction in the beginning?? To get married? Arranged?? I do not know. So, what becomes of the other person when everything becomes what he wants and not what they want? That was the trigger for me.

I understand he wants kids but to dump all the blame on his wife? She won’t lose weight so we can not have kids? I mean who doesn’t want to have babies when they are in a marriage? But to be selfish about it and blame the partner? I wish I could take a rolled up newspaper and hit him on the nose and say bad dog. But, we are here for support and a kind word. Not to judge and criticize. Advice and help. To make things better?

Sometimes I forget that and go off. I apologize for my out burst. I do not want to hurt another human being. Or any animal. So, I take a deep breath and hope better sense comes out of me. I wish you all well. Namaste.

Dear TE:

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings so openly. It’s clear that you deeply care about your wife and your marriage. Navigating changes in physical health and attraction over time can be challenging.

It’s important to approach this situation with empathy and understanding. Your wife’s weight gain might be influenced by various factors, including medical, emotional, and psychological aspects. Here are a few suggestions that might help:

* If you haven’t so far, have an open, compassionate conversation with your wife about your concerns. Focus on health and well-being rather than appearance. Express your love and support for her in every aspect.

* Encourage her to visit a healthcare professional for a thorough check-up. There could be underlying health issues that contribute to weight gain and difficulty with exercise.

* Find activities you both enjoy that promote physical activity but feel less like exercise. This could include dancing, gardening, or even exploring new hobbies together.

* Support her emotionally and help her identify any stressors or emotional challenges that might be affecting her motivation and health. Consider counseling or therapy if needed.

* Understand that changes won’t happen overnight. Show patience and continue to express your love and support. Small, consistent efforts can lead to positive changes over time.

Your dedication to your marriage and love for your wife are evident. Balancing support with empathy and understanding can help you both navigate this together.

Wishing you both the best-

anita

A lot of couples also stop having sex for medical reasons as they get older too. You’re not alone in dealing with a situation like this. It sucks, but it is what it is.