- This topic has 202 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 6 days, 16 hours ago by
anita.
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January 28, 2026 at 4:01 pm #454695
anitaParticipantDear Alessa:
You are very welcome and thank you ๐โจ๐
Alessa the librarian- for some reason it makes me smile affectionately ๐คโจ๐
You put your best into everything, Alessa. I admire that about you. ๐ โจ
About money and anything else that makes me anxious- I avoid, postpone and I take it one day at a time, literally. I also repeat to myself every day a mantra that includes accepting situations I cannot change (radical acceptance) as well as radically accepting my emotions (no longer suppressing, no longer resisting what-is within me and without. This gives me access to energy otherwise wasted in futile resistance.
I had been distrustful of people- expecting people to be like my mother, to catch me off guard with accusations and insults and put downs ๐- much more than I am now. Progress has been made ๐
I am hoping to visit the local taproom for some socialization this afternoon. I hope you are sleeping restfully at this time ๐ด๐ค
๐คAnita
January 28, 2026 at 8:35 pm #454709
anitaParticipantI came back from the taproom, Alessa, was there with Bogart. There were other dogs ๐ there, one was a bit aggressive toward Bogart ๐ , another (a healer) got along very well with Bogart.
I am concerned because Bogart is scheduled for a surgery this Tuesday, getting neutered. I understand it’s necessary because otherwise.. well, I don’t even want to think about it. He’s only a toddler now.
I’d have to leave him at the vet at 7:30 am for the whole afternoon and pick him up after the surgery.. Will he be okay???
I am beside myself right now. Any advice, Alessa?
๐ข Anita
January 28, 2026 at 8:55 pm #454711
Thomas168ParticipantMy advice for Bogart is to remain in a happy mood. Bogart will take his cue from you. If you are full of tension then Bogart will have tension. Sadness and there will be sadness in Bogarts eyes. So, please remain in good spirits to show Bogart what he should be doing.
Savings? What is that? I barely get enough to cover month to month. Now, they are going to take out medicare part B. Property tax is one big bill at the beginning of the year and then another big bill for school tax in September. I have applied for Senior discount on the property taxes. Still there is no savings. I am now regretting buying those tools. The tools just sit in the garage. Could have use that money for food. Well hopefully they will come in handy in the near future.
Everyone,
It seems Japan and China are selling off their notes and bonds. It might mean higher interest rates. Inflation. Maybe? Don’t know yet. Every other country seems to want to get off the US reserve dollar. Brics wants to take over as the world’s reserve currency. Looks like 2026 is going to be an interesting year. Don’t the Chinese have a curse about having an interesting life??
January 29, 2026 at 2:13 am #454714
AlessaParticipantDear Anita
For a boy, it is a minor procedure and recovery is very quick. I’m about to get my girl done too. Bogart will be right as rain. ๐ค
They put them to sleep so as not to upset them during the procedure. So he will mostly be asleep while he is there. Nothing to worry about at all. He will be dreaming and he will have painkillers. He won’t even feel a thing when it happens. When you pick him up he might still be a bit sleepy. That is normal. ๐
So you can tell Bogart to have a good sleep and you will be there when he wakes up! Just spoil him when he is a bit more awake after the procedure and you will feel better about it too. ๐ค
January 29, 2026 at 9:48 am #454721
anitaParticipantDear Thomas:
Thank you for the advice in regard to Bogart, it’s a wise advice. Actually, it’s wise to apply it with people as well.
Elaborating on it, the scientific term for it is Emotional Contagion. It means one individualโs emotional state automatically triggers a similar state in another without conscious intention, and without verbal communication
Humans do it. Dogs do it. Even babies do it. Itโs the most basic form of empathy.
There are such things as Mirror Neurons: if someone looks tense, the other person’s mirror neurons simulate that tension. If someone is relaxed, the other person mirrors that too. Dogs have a similar system, which is why theyโre so attuned to human emotions.
People and dogs pick up on microโexpressions, muscle tension, breathing rate, posture, eye movements, tone of voice and scent changes (dogs smell stress hormones, so I am reading).
๐ ๐ค Anita
January 29, 2026 at 10:01 am #454722
anitaParticipantDear Alessa:
I feel better reading your response ๐ You are very good at being a calm presence. I suppose emotional contagion happens in online communication as well. Even online, we unconsciously can match the emotional tone of the conversation.
It never occurred to me before (never having a dog before) that neutering a male dog is generally easier, quicker, and less invasive than spaying a female dog because male neutering involves removing external testicles, while female spaying requires abdominal surgery.
I hope the surgery goes well both for my boy and your girl ๐ ๐ถ
๐ ๐ค Anita
January 29, 2026 at 3:53 pm #454737
AlessaParticipantHi Tommy
Iโm sorry to hear that you are having some financial difficulties too. It is not easy, especially when you have a family. ๐ฉต
I hear that men feel a lot of pressure to provide for their families. There are many ways to provide. When finances are tight, I find that people rely on their skills and creativity to save money. I’m sure that your family are very proud of you for helping to take such good care of them. They are very lucky to have you, you are so kind as well. ๐ฉต
The time will come when those tools pay for themselves many times over. You wouldn’t have bought them otherwise. ๐ฉต
I have some tools as well. I’m getting a cat for mother’s day and I want to try making some shelves for it to climb on. I’ve always wanted to make cat furniture. I’ll let you know how it goes!
January 29, 2026 at 4:15 pm #454739
AlessaParticipantDear Anita
I’m happy to help. ๐ค
It’s totally understandable. I think you have good instincts for taking care of Bogart. You want to learn and make good decisions to help him. Keep him safe. You’re very rational about it. ๐ค
I like it when people are calm when I’m anxious too. It makes me feel like things are not as bad as I fear. It’s reassuring.
Thank you, I’m sure that she will be fine. Even though the recovery time for girl dogs is longer because it is more difficult surgery, it is still a very safe procedure.
When I have to neuter the cat I’m getting I will be nervous. I have watched too many vet tv shows. Cats have a tricky habit of reacting badly to anaesthetia.
To be fair, taking things one day at a time is all anyone can do. It sounds like you’re doing a good job of managing your anxiety around it. ๐ค
I’m glad to hear that you are making progress when it comes to distrust. It isn’t easy to trust people when you have experienced such severe trauma. I know what it is like. ๐ค
January 29, 2026 at 5:32 pm #454743
anitaParticipantDear Alessa:
You write so well.. Just a perfect ๐ reply in every way. I think that you’re talented.
Thank you for the calm ๐ And for the information, encouragement and support. I am feeling much better about the procedure this coming Tuesday.
And I had no idea people neuteror spay (is that the word? Can’t check because I am using my phone) their cats. Just never thought about it and it didn’t occur to me.
Yes, I am making progress. One thing I noticed most recently is that I am not taking people’s behavior or misbehavior personally like I did before.
I am about to take Bogart on a tiny walk. It’s already dark here. I hope ๐ that you and your son have a restful night ๐ค
๐ค Anita
January 31, 2026 at 11:47 am #454794
AlessaParticipantDear Anita
Thank you for your kind words! ๐ค
Yes, Iโm getting a boy cat and they spray urine around the house marking it if theyโre not neutered. So itโs important to get it done.
Iโm glad to hear that youโre not taking things as personally. I feel like even when things seem difficult, people are usually just acting on their own trauma or whatever is going on in their own lives. Sometimes that understanding isnโt so helpful when people are taking out their difficulties on others.
I hope you have a good day! ๐ค
January 31, 2026 at 12:29 pm #454798
anitaParticipantDear Alessa:
You are welcome and thank you ๐ ๐ค
Last evening I prepared a turkey lunch meat sandwich for myself, with lots of turkey, had it at the edge of the kitchen counter for a moment. Bogart managed to get to it and eat it all before I could stop him. After that, later at night, he went number 2 in the bathroom, diarrhea style. Is it because of the turkey lunch meat?
I’ve been sharing with him (voluntarily) a bit of my lunches, human food, every day, mixed it with his dog food for flavor. I didn’t today because I’m wondering if it’s unhealthy for him.. ?
Up to 6 months, at the breeder’s where he was raised), he nursed on his mother’s milk and then on dry dog food, that and nothing else. So, I am wondering if human food is unhealthy for him?
I agree with what you said. The principle of Do-No-Harm comes to mind.
I hope you have a good night. It’s just after noon here, raining, but have to take Bogart on a longer walk (than this morning’s tiny walk).
๐ค Anita
January 31, 2026 at 10:47 pm #454825
AlessaParticipantDear Anita
Since you were asking, I thought I would check online. It turns out that beagles are prone to digestive problems. And I also looked up the turkey. Yup, too much turkey can cause a case of the runs. I try to look up if foods are bad for dogs, because there are always random things that are bad for them. Onions, tomatoes (with seeds in), grapes, chocolate, citrus fruits are a no go. Dogs can also be lactose intolerant and might have issues with dairy. These are some of the things I remember off the top of my head.
Eating the wrong thing can mean a vet visit. Grapes, even one or a half a grape have a 1 in 40 chance of killing a dog. There are different concentrations of chemicals in grapes. So you never really know if itโs going to be a bad grape or an okay one.
Another difficulty with giving human food as you found out is stealing. ๐ It is also much higher in calories than dog food, so they can more easily become overweight.
Well, congratulations! You have handled one of the grossest things in life. Babies donโt make as much of a mess as a dog with a dodgy tummy. ๐ค
Thank you for sharing Bogarts latest antics! It made me smile. I imagine he was really excited and his eyes went wide as he hurriedly scoffed the sandwich. ๐ฅช ๐
Iโm sure he has no regrets and felt that his dodgy tummy was worth it! Dogs have no common sense. ๐
My girl goes mad for chicken, more so than anything else. Once she stole the better part of a slice of red velvet cake. I had to call the vet for that because of the cocoa powder. I couldnโt find any information online. It turns out she didnโt eat enough to hurt her, but she gave me a fright at the time.
It brings back lots of memories of my old dogs too. One climbed onto a dining table and ate a whole bowl of plums, leaving the stones. My boy husky would always try to steal chocolate. ๐คฆโโ๏ธ I had a cat that tried to steal a scotch egg out of my hand. ๐
I hope Bogartโs tummy feels better soon! ๐ค
๐ค ๐ค ๐ค
February 1, 2026 at 10:55 am #454836
anitaParticipantDear Alessa:
Thank you so much for your detailed (and humorous ๐) reply, as well as for looking up things online.
I had no idea about ๐, ๐ฐ and ๐ and didn’t know about beagles being prone to digestive problems.
Strange thing he loves to eat is banana ๐ peels. Not that I gave him any. It’s that on our walks he comes across banana peels (people obviously eat them while driving (under the influence of banana, lol) and throw the peels out the windows. Last night and this morning he threw up a bit. Could be the peels.
And then, he’s been chewing on his dog bed and stuffed toys ๐งธ, maybe swallowing some of the filling ((I got the stuff out of his mouth repeatedly.. but not all, I am guessing).
I enjoy your humor and stories about your dogs. I feel that I am fortunate to have (I just removed more filling out of his mouth, for crying out loud!).
Anyway, I am fortunate to have your mentoring input, an experienced, knowledgeable and compassionate dog mom.
I am looking forward to stories about your new cat ๐ to be.
๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ค ๐ค ๐ค Anita
February 3, 2026 at 4:51 am #454893
AlessaParticipantDear Anita
Fascinating! Banana peels is a new one. Yes, it could be. It said that it was because they have a tendency to forage for food that they often have dodgy tummies. It was the same for my huskies.
I got some acidophilus pills (the human kind) and put one a day in their food. It helped so much because it was replacing the bad bacteria from whatever dodgy food they picked up outside with good bacteria. If yogurt doesnโt give him a dodgy tummy, that could be another option too. ๐ค
Does he like the taste of banana? My old boy quite enjoyed it.
Haha youโre fighting a never ending battle trying to stop him from eating stuffing. ๐
Thanks, I love hearing about your journey as a dog mom and hearing about the antics Bogart gets up to! ๐ค
Iโm glad you like my sense of humour too! Itโs an acquired taste. ๐ ๐ค
February 3, 2026 at 8:48 am #454898
anitaParticipantDear Alessa:
Thank you for the acidophilus pills/ yogurt advice. Youโre like a library on dogs โ full of knowledge, clarity, and guidance that I genuinely value ๐ ๐
I never thought of giving him banana. I try to give him as little human food as possible. The other day I removed another banana peel out of his mouth during a walk. This morning, he vomited a bit of stuffed toy fuzz ๐ข
And guess where he’s at now? At the vet for his surgery (as well as cleaning the inside of his cute, fluffy ears and trimming his nails. I am concerned, hoping the vet doesn’t call with any problems and that all goes well ๐
Yes, I do like your sense of humor, having successfully acquired it ๐, and I loved your ๐จ ๐คข ๐คฎ on the other thread!
๐คโจ๐ฟAnita
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