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Quelling Loneliness

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  • #30248
    Kelly Nguyen
    Participant

    What do you do with your thoughts when you feel lonely? Do you take action? If so, how does it help and what do you feel after? What do you wish to happen in moments of loneliness?

    • This topic was modified 7 years, 3 months ago by Kelly Nguyen.
    • This topic was modified 7 years, 3 months ago by tinybuddha.
    #30261
    Lori Deschene
    Keymaster

    I find when I feel lonely, it’s usually because I’m withholding my true self in my encounters. It’s less about being alone literally and more about feeling that I’m not really being seen. For example, the loneliest time in my life was when I lived in NYC–and I was surrounded by people. As soon as I engage with someone about something that really matters to me, I start feeling more connected and less isolated!

    #30326

    I agree its possible to feel lonely, even when you are with people. There are times I have felt lonely in a relationship because I do not have a soul connection with the other person…Being with people who know who they are/share similar beliefs does really help, as does reminding myself that even when I feel lonely, I am never alone, I am always connected to God/Love.

    Love and peace,

    Marilyn

    #30420
    Kelly Nguyen
    Participant

    Hi Lori,

    Thanks for sharing. It’s true. Loneliness is something that you could feel even if you are surrounded by a million people. In fact, it could feel even lonelier when you are surrounded by friends, family members or your lover who do not get you. And yes, having meaningful conversations about what’s real with people is what helps.

    Warmly,

    Kelly

     

    #30421
    Kelly Nguyen
    Participant

    Marilyn,

    I love that you surrender to a greater source for connection and to hold you in the space of loneliness.

    Warmly,

    Kelly

    #31951
    Stacie
    Participant

    I cant remember ever not feeling lonely. I’ve self-medicated and stayed in relationships I shouldn’t have as a result and I am only now learning healthy ways to manage it. I struggle with a “higher power” because I am a deist, but I’m trying to get past that and find a connection. I read a post on tiny buddha in Oct of 2011 and because of it, I was finally able to end my 16 year long emotionally and physically abusive marriage. Since then, I’ve been reading posts 3-4 times a week  and I will continue using the site to aid me in my recovery from both substance abuse and codependency.

    I look forward to reading and learning from these forums. 🙂

    #33783
    Kelly Nguyen
    Participant

    Hi Stacie,

    I completely understand why you medicated yourself with relationships. It comes down to love. When in longing, we reach for the best of the bad because it’s the closest to the good. And leaving your 16 year relationship is a BIG deal. Congrats on that very big step. Not easy I am sure.

    Warmly,

    Kelly

    #34417
    ktothek
    Participant

    i find when i’m feeling lonely I am disconnected with my self — my source — that space inside me that makes me feel whole and complete. What helps me get back in touch with that part of me? Meditation. Dance. A conversation with a good friend. Listening to music. Playing my guitar. helping someone. Loneliness is hard, but I try to remind myself it is a great teacher.

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