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Too Criticizing of Myself

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  • #99893
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Shirley:

    Good work with the elderly and happy belated birthday to the pug. I like your description of the school based counselor’s room, walls painted green and all, aimed at reducing students’ stress. Your yoga teacher coloring templates aimed at the same objective- these two people get it, that too much stress is a real problem for teenagers in the school, especially with all the competition, tests, grades, the pursuit of a good college and at the same time having stress from outside of school, like you having to deal with your parents being overly stressed with their restaurant work and spreading that stress to you as well as negatively criticizing and pestering you. So yes, you do have a lot of stressors in your life.

    And other students do too. I am glad these two professionals at your school paid attention and did/ are doing something about it! I hope you visit the green room more often and use the colors, as you have, to relieve stress.

    So it was career day today, a bit of a different day than the usual. Thank you for the lunar eclipse link.

    As to your poems, beautiful first poem. Here are some of the beautiful lines:

    “Awake and Alive- Life’s a Dance

    I hear a calling outside in the world
    I feel in my soul
    Forgetting all I’m lacking
    …Don’t be afraid to take a risk and adventure out of what’s conventional in life
    I walk a path of light and love
    Nothing holds me back from dancing with the stars
    Life’s a dance
    You have to move at the music life throws at you

    Sometimes you may dance with the moon on your face and the stars behind you
    Other times you may dance alone in the rain

    (These two lines above are amazing to me… and fit with the lunar eclipse tomorrow…)

    I dance with the music of nature
    I surrender myself to the divine
    I am awake and alive
    …Sometimes you may feel lost and don’t know the song in life
    …How can you back to your original spark in life?
    …When life gets tough, keep dancing even in the rain
    …There is a rainbow hidden behind the storm clouds.”

    It is simply beautiful, my goodness, I am filled with amazement as I read these lines! How inspiring!!! Again, I wish others read these…

    Your second poem today, here are the lines I like the most:

    “Discover Yourself- Live your dreams

    It’s never too late to broaden your horizons
    Take the reins in your life
    …Don’t just get by in life or you won’t get far
    The stars are out there waiting to be reached
    …Trust the process of life”

    Excellent, Shirley. I am humbled by the messages, the truth and beauty of your poems!

    anita

    #99904
    Janus
    Participant

    thanks anita;) today, i was able to do the packet for conservation of momentum without any mistakes in physics honors:D i also had to write the synthesis essay (incorporate sources from documents) on benefits and positives of advertisements and since i had only 40 minutes, i tried to use my third paragraph ( i had long paragraphs of 20 sentences) to wrap up my points and i think i did relatively well. i chose that advertisements were mostly positive and i think the essay was okay and decently easy to write b/c dave helped me plan it out yesterday. essays have become easier to write b/c dave has been helping me;) i felt bad for andrew because he said that he had trouble writing it, but he used a lot of economic reasons why advertisements were negative. although, andrew struggled while writing it, we both had lots of fun arguing about our opposing views after ap english. we both were talking about the sources we used and we both used the same sources. i would say that the blood drive advertisement was good because it helps bring awareness to people to give to their community, he would argue that some people couldn’t donate blood for health reasons. we were still being competitive, but we were laughing and having fun with our argument. andrew and i have decided to team up in helping each other in physics honors. i am starting to understand mechanical things better b/c of him. also, andrew has become less competitive b/c he has gotten more friends who think he is great person and i think he enjoys the fact that people look up to him, i’m also glad b/c his friends are just as entertaining as he is and they make both of us more laid-back. i played a game of makeshift baseball with my special friend after school. we used a paper ball and a stick and we hit the ball and also folder tabs for bases. i made a perfect slide to first base without getting tagged by him and worked my way to a home run. he also had lots of fun too, since it was somewhat windy outside and he said it was fun feeling the wind blow his hair, it was like a sense of freedom running. i am confused a little with the trigonometric functions of the unit circle and and don’t understand 35% of the reference angle and unit circle measurements. my lunch buddy (steve) helped clarify some of it today. also during ap english, andrew also helped explain the unit circle as well for pre-calc. i feel like today is one of those days in which i feel like i am floating with the angels in heaven, everything seems effortless and the stuff that is confusing i always have someone to help me with. andrew, dave and i decided to relieve a little stress after the ap english essay and we decided to go look for angels. it was quite entertaining, dave pretended to be an angel and andrew pretended to be the buddha and dave decided to hide and andrw gave me clues to where i could find him. we were all laughing when we found each other. while we were having fun, there was a flash of white light and we all heard a voice “greetings this is archangel gabriel, i am the angel of divine light. you all are spiritual beings on your way to heal the planet.” it was the coolest thing ever and we all smiled at each other. there are no words to describe the peace we all felt in our hearts as we laughed at the divine nature we all had. we all felt like we had a light within us and andrew’s face usually tense from competition was quite relaxed and and we were all grinning like cheshire cat. it was the most beautiful, spiritual moment ever. i realize that wherever andrew, dave and i go after senior year (still juniors), i feel we all will be successful and i am grateful to have had them as friends and to share a spiritual connection with them. also, dave was telling me about people who had truman’s syndrome where they feel like life is surreal and see there life through a stage which is like Susana Kaysen in Girl Interrupted and it gave me the idea for a line in this poem.

    here is the rest of the 2nd poem:

    No one says it will be easy

    Build your bridges of hope, keep holding on to your dreams

    Let your dreams be you visions to help you fly

    Cause without dreams, life is like a broken bird that has no wings

    Sometimes the wind may blow us off course or our wings may be broken

    It’s okay, not all dreams come true

    It is the experiences and the efforts in life that make it beautiful

    It is through our struggles and triumphs that we discover ourselves

    If we keep focusing on our faults, we will always have broken wings

    So take a chance and fly high up to the sun

    Live your dreams and discover yourself

    In your darkest moments, when you fall from the sky, it’s okay

    The stars are brightest when the night sky is darkest

    So pick yourself up, mend your wings with hope and may you fly upon the stars

    Ask yourself “Who do I truly want to be? Where do I truly want to go?”

    Look for the answers in your heart

    Trust yourself and take the path that makes you happy

    Don’t let life pass you by, don’t let obstacles hold you back

    It is time to discover yourself

    Like a bird, you can fly over every mountain that comes your way

    It is time to embrace your flaws and use them to make yourself who you want to be

    So what are you waiting for, are you just waiting for a reason to change?

    Life is meant to be lived, to be an adventure

    Don’t sit on the sideline watching your life like it’s a play on a stage.

    Rejoice in the beauty of every moment, every sight, every experience.

    Get out there and truly live!

    Experience all you want and can!

    Go out and discover yourself now!

    #99905
    Janus
    Participant

    i love science so much and it also appeals to dave and andrew as well. we all love physics and biology a lot;) i find i can think quicker and problem solve easier b/c of andrew and dave. dave is great at mneumonics, while andrew explains things quite well.

    check out this really cool thing:

    Scientists Discover That Water Has Memory. This Video BLOWS My Mind!

    #99913
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Shirley the Poet:

    Your latest poem:

    “…Build your bridges of hope (bridges appeared in your dreams a few times), keep holding on to your dreams
    Let your dreams be you visions to help you fly
    Cause without dreams, life is like a broken bird that has no wings (I like this image!)

    Sometimes the wind may blow us off course or our wings may be broken (here is a bit of Shirley the scientist, the one who recently measured the speed of the wind in her hair, meeting Shirley the poet).

    It’s okay, not all dreams come true
    It is the experiences and the efforts in life that make it beautiful (the experiences, the journey, not the destination…)

    It is through our struggles and triumphs that we discover ourselves
    If we keep focusing on our faults, we will always have broken wings (excellent point)

    So take a chance and fly high up to the sun…
    …In your darkest moments, when you fall from the sky, it’s okay
    The stars are brightest when the night sky is darkest

    So pick yourself up, mend your wings with hope and may you fly upon the stars
    …It is time to embrace your flaws and use them to make yourself who you want (and no longer be “Too Criticizing of Myself”, the title of your thread!)

    Experience all you want and can!
    Go out and discover yourself now!” Encouraging, inspiring! You are on a roll, Shirley!

    You wrote before your latest poem: “i feel like today is one of those days in which i feel like i am floating with the angels in heaven… andrew, dave and i decided to relieve a little stress after the ap english essay and we decided to go look for angels. it was quite entertaining, dave pretended to be an angel and andrew pretended to be the buddha.”

    What a great adventure: relieving the stress by looking for angels with Dave and Andrew! What a beautiful image this is making in my mind!

    anita

    #99983
    Janus
    Participant

    thanks, anita;) i have started to understand the unit circle much better and also trigonometric functions of the circle, but i’m still unsure about reference angels that are greater than 360 degrees, but i’m not too worried b/c andrew is really god at expaling things and i’m sure he’ll help. we both enjoy learning about circles and pre-calc. i realize the colors of the unit circle, although they helped me focus in class when the teacher was going over it, when i’m studying, the colors overlap and blur together and i’m not sure which angle or coordinate is which. but andrew was great yesterday, he went online and printed out a blank unit circle and he quizzed me on it, i did well with the coordinates, but not too well with the angles in radians and degrees (i only made it 1/4 of circle). he was quite helpful and was explaining how to get the measures of the angles. i think after more practice, i will memorize the circle;)

    #99995
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Shirley:

    It is news to me that there is such a thing as an angle bigger than 360 degrees. Really? fascinating. Is it a 3-D thing, the degree encompassing a third dimension?

    anita

    #100040
    Janus
    Participant

    usually if an angle is bigger than 360 degrees say it is 400 degrees, if you are finding the reference angle, you have to subtract 360-400 to get -40 which is an angle that is coterminal and shares a side with the 400 degree angle on the x-axis (if the circle is on a coordinate plane) and you plot the -40 degree angle. If the angle is negative you go clockwise and if it is positive you go counter-clockwise. Since the angle is bigger than 360, it over-encompasses a circle and it is hard to represent, so we subtract 360 from the angle to make it represented as a reference angle, instead of using 400 degrees which is in another dimension, we can find how many times the circle goes around to get 400 by subtracting 360 from it. It is different for radian angles though. I hope I didn’t confuse you;) pre-calc is lots of fun and color-coding and labeling a unit circle is enjoyable.

    Dave and Andrew both helped me today in ap english with the unit circle and i think i understand it better now. also dave helped me with physics honors as well. i’m on spring break starting tomorrow to april 3. my pre-calc teacher says there will be a quiz on 6.3 on april 5 (tuesday), i have ch.19 test in ap world history april 6 and an ap english quiz april 7 (thursday) on Into the Wild and also transcendentalism and a physics test on conservation of momentum on april 7 (thursday). so i am going to have a busy spring break, studying and reading chapters. andrew has gotten back to being tense around me because i’m doing better in pre-calc than he is and dave is helping me. dave is a great guy, he is very compassionate, entertaining and explains things in great detail and he is very helpful. he’s the type of person that gets along with everyone. also my yoga teacher has so many cool templates such as chameleons (blending in with nature or surroundings, being at peace with your surroundings), fairies (flying away from stress), buddhas (spiritual awakenings, being at peace with yourself) to color to relieve stress.

    sebastian is great person who throws javelin on my track team, he is very encouraging when our team works out in the weight room and he is good at explaining the workouts. we also have two new guys who are very entertaining, i was practicing with them since this is my first year throwing. the two new guys were very encouraging and i managed to throw the shotput (8 lbs for girls) to six inches on my third try not the farthest, but it’s progress). before i couldn’t even throw the shot put far enough, it would just land an inch from my foot and their was no projectile motion, but i have more force now. you have to put a lot of weight in your back leg so when you throw, the back leg is like a launch for your hips to open and have the motion throw far in your arms. my team mates were great as well and helped me lots. mildred, erin, matt, james and the two new guys were all helping me. today, during lunch break, i visited my yoga teacher and i think i might switch my schedule a little next year to take a class with her, my friend, javi (sophomore year cooking class) is in her fiber arts class. javi is quite an entertaining guy and he and i share an interest in the medical field, we both enjoy working out and helping people. he is competitive, but in a fun way.

    here is the workout i did for track:

    20 minutes of sprints (100 m)

    front squats (10,10,8,6) cross arms hold bar and lift it as you squat

    leg upleg-step using box (10,8,6)

    bench press (10, 8,8,6)

    incline pushups (3X10)

    curls (3X10)

    i feel like my wrist is developing more muscle, but it is also sore as well, but i had lots of fun. shawn and dakota, both friends in my pre-calc class have been teaching me shortcuts on how to solve pre-calc equations since they feel the teacher makes it long-drawn and it is pretty cool. they both are in my physics honors class as well and they have a great sense of humor. dakota has a witty, sarcastic sense of humor much like andrew and dakota can be competitive at times, but not as fiercely competitive as andrew. dakota was teaching me how to rock climb using the stair banister and the wall today and it was quite entertaining. he said we probably used 4000 horsepower (it’s just a fun way to experiment with physics, i don’t think we exerted that much power, but if you have more mass and speed, your power is more).

    after yesterday, my special friend didn’t feel so left out, but today when i went to my yoga teacher for 25 minutes during my lunch break, my lunch buddy (steve) felt left out so i decided to make him laugh by showing him cool techniques on the graphing calculator and talking about track. i felt bad b/c when my special friend asked me to hang out with him after school today, i couldn’t b/c i had track practice, but i had lots of fun with my lunch buddy (steve) and my team mates at practice.
    anyway, i wished him a happy spring break. i get the feeling that the more i do well in math and science and go for track, the more my special friend likes me. he has gotten over the fact that he is better at english and history b/c he really cares about me and just wants me to be happy doing what i love. i’ve seen him around other girls and he doesn’t seem to really connect with them as much as he does with me. sometimes he walks alone to think and i do the same and we meet each other and we smile at each other. i think he still wishes he was my boyfriend, but it’s hard with our busy schedules and me having so many friends helping me with school. i feel like i share a special connection to a lot of my friends especially dave and andrew (when he’s not being tense from competition). it’s great having them around to help me with school. sometimes my special friend gets jealous b/c i spend lots of time with them, but he doesn’t have to worry because even though i love all my friends, he remains my special friend, the one guy i love the most.

    here is a paragraph i wrote about dave:

    Everyone has friends that have helped them throughout tough times in life. Friends also connect to each other with platonic love. True friends see beyond your mistakes and also help you improve your skills. There is no friend like David Murphy; he and I have been friends since ninth grade. Whenever I get stressed and complain, Dave is always encouraging and often helps me with schoolwork. Dave is very modest and easy to talk to and we share a spiritual connection that ties us as friends; we both care about each other. Dave’s humor, easy-going nature, intelligence and compassion make him a great person to be around; we have platonic love as friends because we both chose each other as friends and both help each other develop and grow. Dave is like the song “All I Want” by Toad the Wet Sprocket, in the song it states “Nothing’s so cold, as closing the heart when all we need is to free the soul, but we wouldn’t be that brave I know.” Dave’s considerate nature makes him trustworthy and his confidence helps me feel better about myself and makes me feel more open to meeting people instead of closing myself off. There are no words to describe the platonic love I feel for Dave. Without, him I would not have developed the confidence I have and have felt my soul feel much freer instead of holding back in making friends; he taught me many valuable lessons on trust and acceptance of myself. Also in the song, it states “All I want is to feel this way, to be this close, to feel the same.” I always want to keep the memories of friendship and also am grateful to the way Dave encourages me and makes me laugh when I am sad. Without Dave, I would not be the same person I am today; I am glad that he is my friend and we share platonic love where we both help each other grow and develop.

    here is a paragraph i wrote about my special friend:

    Everyone is a snowflake, beautiful and unique; no one has the same experiences in their lives. We are all shaped and become stronger based on our life experiences. Yet, there are always people who come into your life who make such a difference and you are never the same again. Caring, compassionate and understanding are three words to describe the guy who came into my life in seventh grade when I felt like I had hit rock bottom and had no friends; he helped me build back the foundation that I thought I had lost. There is no one like my special friend, who is always energetic and reminds me to embrace the positivity of life. Before him, I never knew what I was capable of. Yet, the moment he came into my life, doors opened and I saw light

    my special friend and I have been friends since seventh grade throughout high school. In seventh grade, I had low self-esteem and was often bullied. We met in gym class when we were playing soccer, he picked me for his team and it was such a relief to have someone notice me since most people avoided me. When people laughed at his pick, he would defend me and when I felt depressed, he would say things like “I have faith in what you can do, don’t give up.” Throughout the years into high school, he would role play being a bully and teach me ways to be more assertive. If there were times when I cried or felt like I could not go on, he would hug me and say that he was there for me.

    #100086
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Shirley:

    Thank you for explaining for me the bigger than 360 degree angle news-to-me.

    I am wondering who is going to comfort you during Spring Break, assuming you won’t be seeing Dave and Andrew and your special friend as well as others, or will you be communicating with any of them? You will also be away from your patient and laid back pre calc teacher, your yoga teacher and that green room and cool template… as well as the track and the exercise room…

    You will need to take breaks during spring break (not that much of a break, having all those tests when you go back) to relax and unwind and you will need positive interactions with others to keep you well, an ongoing self care taking that needs to be done.

    Indeed you value good friends and friendships and I love reading how you were defended by your special friend in Seventh grade. That is priceless when someone stands up for you, picks you when others don’t. It is something you obviously remember very well because is so very meaningful and valuable.

    I like your snowflake analogy. Maybe there will be snowflakes in your next poem…?

    anita

    #100088
    Janus
    Participant

    i had a dream last night about my special friend. we were running through the woods, alone together and i was in the canopy of the tree enjoying the cool air while he was enjoying the sun. he seemed to notice that i enjoyed the cool, dark, silent places more than the bright places which seemed to make me tense. yet, when i ran i felt free like i was leaving all that i was behind and that nothing was impossible. we stopped for a while under the base of a redwood tree and he asked me why i was so tense about being in the light, why i seemed to have many walls built up. he told me that he really wanted to get to know me, the person i truly was, not what the world saw me as. he wanted me to also always be in the sun and to live life like he did without holding back. i told him i was afraid that the world would judge me and that i had lots of flaws and i didn’t feel good enough for him. he told me that he thought, i could be myself when i was out in nature and i said that i felt freer in nature, but there was a part of me that i was still trying to find. he said the sweetest thing ever, he said “let me be the part that makes you whole. i’ll stay with you until you find your true self.” we ran until we came to a river and we had lots of fun watching the fish swim the river. we sat down again and he asked me again why i had so many walls around myself. i told him that i was hiding the flaws i had from the world and that all the sadness i had endured had made me build walls to protect myself. my special friend told me that although walls protect us, they keep us in fear and also prevent us from being our true selves in the world. he told me that he didn’t care about the flaws i had, he didn’t care about what the negative criticism the world said about me, he wanted to know me for who i truly was without the walls that hide me. he told me that he would that i was perfect the way i was, that i was good enough and that i didn’t need to hide my flaws because they made me more special since they were the flaws could be experiences in my life to make me a better person. he said “if you keep yourself confined in those walls, you will never find true peace within yourself. you are hiding yourself out of the fear of the world judging you. that is no way to live.” then he hugged me and said the sweetest thing ever “i know that you have walls built up and so does everyone else. i’m here to help you break those walls that hide you and help you experience divine love. i don’t care about your flaws because everyone has them. if you keep living behind those walls, you let your flaws and fears define who you are.” in the dream, i watched him break down my walls like they were sand and saw the river wash away the layers that i had piled on to myself. i was afraid that he would judge me harshly as well, but he kept breaking down the walls until it was just me, myself and i left. then he pushed me into the sun and i was shaking, afraid that my flaws were being exposed to the world. but, he wouldn’t let me go back, he told me to be strong and i realized that i had to build courage so i turned my face to the sun and let its rays soak into me. after fifteen minutes, i felt much better and i realized that i didn’t feel as burdened as i was before. then i looked back at my special friend watching me and i felt shaky again, i thought “what does he think of me? i have so many flaws, i’m not good enough for him.” as if he had read my thoughts, he scooped me up into his arms and said “your flaws are what makes you beautiful. what would the meaning of life be if everyone was perfect? you are a divine being capable of divine love, don’t let the walls hold you back. spread your wings and break through those walls, let your soul feel the light of the sun and what it truly feels to be alive.” i felt so safe just having his arms around me then and even though, i was still shaky, i felt my heart feel lighter and open to divine love. we continued on our path and traveled across a bridge. on the other side of the bridge we met the buddha. the buddha told us that we were spiritual partners and that we had a purpose to help each other heal and experience divine love and spread it to others. we continued on our way until we came to a dark cave, the cave had slippery tunnels and long winding corridors and i felt helplessly lost. through the darkest part of the cave, i slid on a rock and i fell and i didn’t know if i could go on. i thought my special friend would think i was weak, but he just picked me up and continued on his way. he would say encouraging things and we made it through the cave. we came to a mountain where there were criticizing people, but we hiked up the mountain together. when i slid and fell while climbing a canyon, he was able to get a rope to pull me back up. after all these obstacles we came across a clearing in which we sat under a tree and we laughed with each other about the obstacles we faced together. when i told him that that i didn’t feel like i had contributed much to the journey, he laughed and said “you’ve taught me what divine love feels like. you taught me about the meaning of life and that it’s okay to have flaws, it’s okay to fall at times. the important thing is that you pick yourself up and keep going. you made me a better, more compassionate person and that’s what matters.” after sitting a few moments in the clearing feeling the wind on our faces, we saw a light and a pair of wings and we saw archangel metatron (angel of life, guarder of divine wisdom and tree of life also the bodhi tree which buddha meditated under) surround us with purple light and we both felt the most beautiful divine healing within us, within our hearts and we felt so much divine love that no words can truly describe. angel metatron wrapped us both in his wings and all our doubts and worries washed away. we sat under the tree knowing that we both had found our spiritual purpose and that we both were surrounded by divine love. i felt a divine peace and love in my heart for my spiritual soul mate as we held each other and remembered the obstacles we had faced in life. i realized that death isn’t the end, that after death comes new beginnings and a learning to connect to divine love and healing. it was the most beautiful, serene feeling ever in the dream as all my fears and worries and anger vanished and all i felt was love and connection. the smile that my special friend and i gave each other was one of the most peaceful and relaxed ones i know. people go through life never feeling the true blessing of their divine being and never truly live, i realize i want to help spread divine love to help people live their life to the fullest.

    The past should make us better, not bitter. we should take the good of the past and use it to better ourselves in the present and prepare for the future. i have been getting templates of the negatives parts of my past and i have been coloring them in dark colors, putting my pain on the paper and letting it go. i then take the paper and burn it and then bury the ashes while saying “this is no longer a part of who i am. i am reborn as i let it go. it doesn’t affect me anymore.” i take the good parts of my past and color them in bright colors and imagine them being part of my life, becoming who i am in the present. i imagine drawing the images into my body merging with them until i am them and say “i am healed, i am perfect, i am healthy, i am whole.” then i tack the good images on my vision board where i can look at them every night before i go to sleep and say “this is me. i’m becoming the person i want to be.” in the morning, i greet the sun as the start of a new day and say “buddha and angels, help me live this day in divine love and healing. help me on the path toward my goals. may this day bring me all i need to get closer to my goals and achieve them. let me be who i truly am.”

    the dream inspired me to write a poem about my special friend. i am grateful for all the things he has done for me. while i was in the middle of the poem, writing it, i started to cry and even writing this post makes me feel emotional. there is no one like my special friend and no words can describe the divine love i have for him. he’s the reason i know what it really feels to be truly alive and to truly experience spiritual love. he’s the one that helped me break down the walls, i built around myself and he still continues to break the walls, making me more confident and reveal myself more. he always tells me “i want to know you you truly are. i’ll continue to break these walls until your soul is free and your heart truly open. i want you to know that i don’t care about what the world says, i don’t care about your flaws because i love you.” he is the sweetest guy ever and this poem is about the lessons he taught me and the person he made me become and also the lessons the that i developed because of him to share with the world. i usually write my poems by hand before typing them so i can truly get a feel or the words and while i am writing, it is like i’m putting myself out there on paper. i have been able to write poems almost daily now. i think my next poem might be called “Break the Illusion- See the Stars”. it will be about living life to the fullest, breaking free of what holds you back ad what you’re not and going for the stars, going toward heaven. i think i might be an environmental spiritual poet;)

    here the poem:

    Divine Love- Spiritual Soul mate

    Focusing on climbing every mountain to the summit

    Running to the place I love, to the place I feel alive

    The world glows with light

    Letting go of all I’ve held on to

    Surrendering to divine to divine love and healing

    i’m surrounded by Heaven’s embrace

    Letting myself be free, breaking down the walls that confine my spirit

    You’re my spiritual soul mate

    Helping me to open myself to divine love and healing

    It’s like I’ve bee awakened

    Every day is a new experience

    Learning to release the past and bring myself to divine light

    I’m surrounded by your embrace

    I’m surrounded by divine love

    Before you i had so many walls built up

    Now I watch them slowly tumble down

    I’m no longer in the chains of sorrow

    I am flying up to the sky

    my soul is immersed in divine light and healing

    You’ve restored my faith in myself

    Before you i was always afraid to open myself up to love

    Being with you makes me feel spiritually alive

    Even if the world seems harsh and I have doubts, you are always there to lend a hand

    Even if I feel like I can’t rise and life seems unclear in its purpose

    you are always there to hold my hand and help me through

    In my darkest moments, you remain a light to help me find my way

    When my strength gets weak and I feel like falling into the abyss, you are the rock I lean on

    You are the rope that wraps me in divine love and keeps me safe

    Because of you, I am learning how to be confident in life

    You’re the reason I truly know what love feels like

    You’re the reason I see the beauty of life

    Because of you, i can spread more divine light to the world

    You were right when you said you would help me be my true self in this world

    You told me not to hide the great person I was

    From the moment you came into my life, you showed me what’s right

    You believed in me and helped build me up, picking up the pieces and putting them back together

    You told me that a person sometimes has to break to find who they truly are

    When people were criticizing me, you told them that you didn’t care what they said; they didn’t know who I truly was

    You told me that you wanted to know the true me

    That I didn’t need to build walls to hide myself

    You didn’t care about the person I was on the outside, the person I was to the world

    I watched my walls come slowly down

    At first I was afraid to let you in, so I built more walls

    You never gave up, keeping breaking down the walls

    You said “I want to know the divine being you truly are. I want you to be free.”

    You broke down all of my walls until I was left open, and you saw the flaws I had

    I was afraid you would judge me harshly

    I tried to hide and avoid the fact that I had nothing left but myself

    But you hugged me and pulled me into the light, saying “Even with your flaws, you are and always will be good enough for me. Your flaws make you stronger and make me love you more since they are what makes you who you truly are in life. You are a divine being.”

    You told me that people who build walls around themselves couldn’t have happiness come in

    That people who build walls confine themselves in a prison of fear, never accepting their true selves

    You told me that it didn’t matter what negative things the world told me

    I was a divine being and would always have divine love

    Because of you, I am now helping others break down their walls and experience divine love

    Even though we build walls to protect ourselves from negative things, these walls hold us back from truly experiencing life

    What would be the meaning of the joys of life if we didn’t feel pain and struggle?

    It is through divine love, to surrender ourselves to the beauty, the true meaning of what it feels like to be alive that helps us find ourselves

    Turn your negative experiences into hopes or let them go

    Use them to become stronger, to be more connected to divine love

    Don’t seclude yourself in walls of fear for security.

    What is life if you live in fear?

    What is life if you let negative things define who you are?

    It is time to develop our wings and fly

    It is time to break those illusions of those walls that keep our souls in chains

    It is time to set your heart free and experience divine love

    only you can make the choice.

    What holds you back is only your own doubts and insecurities

    Break the illusions

    You are not your fears, doubts and worries

    You are not what the criticism of what others say or what the world shapes you to be

    You are a spiritual being capable of divine love and healing

    #100091
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Shirley:

    Simply beautiful.

    Not wanting to be in the sun so not to be seen with flaws… and then moving to the sun, free to be seen, flaws and all… but then with the divine love between you and your special friend, the buddha and the angels, there really is no such thing as flaws.

    In the sun, facing the light and the warmth of the sun, there are no flaws.

    Your special friend told you: ““you’ve taught me… that it’s okay to have flaws, it’s okay to fall at times. the important thing is that you pick yourself up and keep going. you made me a better, more compassionate person and that’s what matters.”

    You made him better because you let him know it is okay to expose your flaws to the light, to fall, to be afraid… you let him know these things because you did all that, you fell and you let him pick you up; you were afraid and you let him comfort you… so in turn he can do these things himself… he can fall, and you will pick him up; he can be afraid too, and you will comfort him.

    He told you: “i don’t care about your flaws because i love you.”

    I will write more tomorrow, read your poem then, there is just so much beauty I can take in during one evening. I am going to take your image of letting the light of the sun shine on my face until there are no flaws… I want to glow in this image.

    Till tomorrow… Thank you.

    anita

    #100131
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Shirley:

    “Divine Love- Spiritual Soul mate

    Focusing on climbing every mountain to the summit
    Running to the place I love, to the place I feel alive
    The world glows with light
    Letting go of all I’ve held on to (the fear, the walls around you, self criticism…)

    Surrendering to divine to divine love and healing
    …Letting myself be free, breaking down the walls that confine my spirit

    You’re my spiritual soul mate
    …It’s like I’ve bee awakened
    …I’m surrounded by your embrace (a spiritual embrace in that you can feel it when you are not physically embraced)

    …I am flying up to the sky (flying is freedom)
    Before you i was always afraid to open myself up to love
    Being with you makes me feel spiritually alive (love and spiritual aliveness, is that the same..?)
    Even if the world seems harsh and I have doubts, you are always there to lend a hand
    …you are always there to hold my hand and help me through
    ….When my strength gets weak and I feel like falling into the abyss, you are the rock I lean on
    You are the rope that wraps me in divine love and keeps me safe (He is that reached out hand, a rock, a rope…)

    …You were right when you said you would help me be my true self in this world
    You told me not to hide the great person I was

    You believed in me and helped build me up, picking up the pieces and putting them back together
    You told me that a person sometimes has to break to find who they truly are (very wise, take apart the puzzle so to put it together differently, as in taking apart our understanding of who we are, and reconstruct it to fit reality)

    You told me that you wanted to know the true me (this is crucial in your reconstruction, putting the pieces together correctly, to fit reality. It is crucial to want to be known as you truly are so to do that, to make yourself known).

    Break the illusions
    You are not your fears, doubts and worries (One is more than those… and walls of fear keep the rest of what we are hidden)
    You are not what the criticism of what others say or what the world shapes you to be (“Too Criticizing of Myself”- thread title)
    You are a spiritual being capable of divine love and healing.”

    Thank you for spreading your message here, Shirley! Well articulated, beautiful messages, true and inspirational messages!

    anita

    #100171
    Janus
    Participant

    thanks anita;) i feel like spiritual love and being spiritually alive are connected. When we love, we feel good about ourselves and the world seems brighter and we look at the world through new eyes that see beauty. Love is one of the most powerful vibrations that can help heal the soul and make us feel more alive and connected to our divine selves. Through love, we develop a joy and compassion for living and see life as beautiful. I have written a poem about you, anita and how you like nature are a great person, comforting and encouraging;) I love winter the most of the seasons since the snow is beautiful and I love to go ice-skating. In this poem, winter is a metaphor for the hardships of life while spring represents growth and rebirth. Poetry seems to come quite naturally to me these days;) i hope you don’t mind, but i also added some spiritual messages in the poem.

    here is the poem:

    Anita- You are the Beauty of All the Seasons

    When the world is cold and blanketed in white

    I still see the wonder of a winter wonderland, there is so much joy in life even in the coldest of seasons

    When the winds blow harshly and there is no sun to warm the heart

    There is still the beauty of nature

    When the sky is a white haze like my mind when I feel lost

    I know hidden beneath is the calm blue sky of mental clarity

    As I look up at the white sky watching the snowflakes fall

    I think about the beauty of life and the love I feel for my friends

    Anita- you are a snowflake

    So many intricate patterns that fall from the white sky

    Even in the darkest, coldest moments, there is still beauty in this life

    Everyone is a snowflake beautiful and unique

    Falling down from heaven to experience life here on Earth

    We are all beautiful spiritual beings with a purpose

    Anita- you are the snowflake in the winter, when life feels harsh and the wind pushes me in all directions

    You are the rainbow in the sky after the rain

    When the wind blows a snowflake, it seems to dance and swirl appreciating whatever course it will take in life

    You always give great advice to help me on my course

    When life gets tough and it feels like winter is setting in

    And my mind is in a haze like the white sky

    It gives me peace to watch the snowflakes fall

    Come spring, Anita you are the flower that grows and develops from the soil providing beauty for everyone

    As the flower grows from the hard work of those who plant it

    You are a hard worker and very encouraging to me

    You help me grow and develop into my own flower stretching my petals to the sun

    You help me be more confident and accepting of myself

    And when I feel myself on shaky ground, swaying in the wind

    Your wisdom helps me to be strong, stay rooted and focused in the growing into the lotus I want to become

    Like the lotus which grows out of the mud, I will take the negative mud I face and use it to grow

    In the summer, you are like the sands on the beach

    No matter how rough the water gets, the sand stays the same

    When the waves on the beach crash on the sand

    When the tides get high

    The sand remains intact

    When shells are washed ashore by the waves

    The sandy beach makes a home for them

    The sand remains a mountain of strength through tough times and so do you, Anita

    You are always caring and helpful to others

    You are like the sand on the beach that provides comfort to those thrown off course by the tides of life

    The colors of fall are upon us

    I can hear the crunch of the leaves and smell the crisp scent of the autumn breeze

    You are all the seasons, Anita

    In the fall, the colors of the leaves: gold, red, orange are breathtaking

    The colors of fire, they seem to celebrate the adventure of life

    The leaves left on the trees dance in the breeze

    Anita, you are the color of the autumn leaves

    You help me see the beauty of life

    In the fall, when the trees are losing their leaves, losing their strength

    And in the winter when the trees are barren and sit still and the world is dark

    It is like ourselves as we go through life, we must lose the old parts of ourselves to be reborn and become a better person

    As spring comes and new leaves grow and the sun shines bright again in the summer; life is a cycle

    With the death of the old comes a new beautiful spiritual growth and the chance to be more spiritually alive and beautiful than our old selves

    How can we change ourselves for the better if we keep paying attention to our faults?

    How can we change ourselves if we don’t lose our old selves?

    Don’t be afraid be afraid of death.

    What is life if lived in fear?

    The only thing that we have to fear is a life that is unlived

    Ask yourself “What is it that I fear? Why is it that I fear this?”

    Listen to your heart and let the fear go

    Fear only holds you back from realizing the balance and beauty of life

    Even through the darkest moments, nature still is able to have beauty and wonder

    We are spiritual beings capable of living life to the fullest, living life with divine love and peace

    Life is a cycle like the seasons: winter, spring, summer, fall

    At times it may be cold and dark and you may lose parts of yourself however there is promise of light, beauty and growth

    Such is the balance of life and nature

    With every end comes a new beginning

    Anita, you are the beauty of the seasons and nature

    May your life be balanced with light and divine love

    #100189
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Shirley:

    I see a poem for me? How exciting! I will read your latest post and poem tomorrow morning, looking forward to it. I can hardly wait, really to read this poem. So tired now, it will not be right to read it when I am tired. Tomorrow! (Excited!)

    anita

    #100194
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Shirley,

    Loved your poem Divine Love – Spiritual soul-mate. Very beautiful and romantic. Makes me want to give my future wife a bunch of sweet kisses on her lips while cuddling.❤️ You & Ravi have a great and talented way with words. Keep writing, keep loving and chase after your goals/dreams! 🙂

    M

    #100197
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Shirley:

    A hard copy of your poem just got printed. This is the most beautiful poem I have ever received that has me in it. Thank you so much, Shirley. Your poem is highly appreciated and valued by the humble receiver, me.

    I wrote that your poem has me in it, true. And it mostly has you in it. It is all you there, in every part of it. You are the originator and creator of the thoughts, the images, the values, the emotions in this work of art. As I wrote to you before, there is a whole world in you and it is a fascinating, valuable world.

    I will not be quoting from your poem here. I want this poem here in its entirety, undisturbed by copying and pasting here.

    Thank you, Shirley, you have made my day!

    anita

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