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walk away with no explination

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This topic contains 6 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  Prash 3 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #216201

    chil
    Participant

    What if people just walk away after an episode with no explanation, no notice and just return back for their needs. person whom u trusted whom u loved , I am not talking about someone in relation, This is about friend, about aunt, about brother… what is this,

    Where is the answer for such thing in the universe, Where does this feelings evoporate? What is the balance in the universe? I am more than hurt……..

    Forgiveness, healing is their real such thing, or only need in this universe to be crude.

    • This topic was modified 4 months ago by  chil.
    #216243

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Chil:

    Are you referring to the friend you posted about in your last thread, the colleague at work?  I read through your previous threads and have some understanding of your life circumstances (married, a mother of two, unsatisfactory marriage). I would like to know more.

    anita

    #216283

    chil
    Participant

    Hi Anita,
    <p style=”text-align: left;”>yes it’s my friend at work who puts me into this when I see her. Now we share same cube as in our new location. She gets back to me when ever she needs help. When she is done she slips off. I never say no , nor show my pain since it is work….this makes me feel even worse.  other people I am talking about  is close family who fought among themselves  with whom I grew up and tell me things cannot be normal and just build the grave with stones of hatred and vengeance but show the beautiful serene lovely faces out. Why am I not like everyone just carefree? How to be like that? I suffer in wards ? I lack the friend ? My close friends are busy with families moreover I don’t feel connected? Even if I tell someone I might sound silly stupid. Nor to my husband it makes sense. I try to fix things obviously which are not under my control.try to help. I fail. I lack confidence to make new friends. My job can be at stake or no growth if I don’t socialize, I feel I am ver artificial

    • This reply was modified 4 months ago by  chil.
    #216289

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Chil:

    Reads like you suffer and have suffered for a long time. I think you are looking for the real things in life, honesty, true friendship and true love with a man. Unfortunately your family members that you mentioned are not honest, full of “hatred and vengeance” but showing a false face to the outside. Your friend gets closer to you when she needs your help and then withdraws, and your husband, you shared in a previous thread is also using you, in that he needs you to work and bring in the money and be of service to him  otherwise, but does not appreciate you otherwise.

    Basically you are living a lonely life as far as the adults in your life: family of origin, husband, others.

    I wish you had one true, close friend who  will be honest with you and consistently supportive, on your side.

    Please do post here anytime and I for one, will respond to you when I am at the computer.

    anita

    #216325

    Mark
    Participant

    Chil,

    People treat you as you treat yourself.  If someone treats you as if they don’t really respect or care for you then let them go.  If you are willing to let people treat you as if you were a rug, that there is no consideration, that they take rather than give then you are responsible for that.  Look at how you love yourself compared how you love others then act  accordingly.

    https://psychcentral.com/blog/what-it-means-to-teach-people-how-to-treat-you/

    Mark

    #218853

    chil
    Participant

    Thanks Anitha and Mark for replies.

    It means lot to me that someone is talking to me hearing me….

    Thank you

    Chill

    #218855

    Prash
    Participant

    Dear Chil,

    You sound like you are introverted and due to the people around you who fail to support you, you are having difficulty expressing yourself. You don’t have to be like others. You just need to be yourself. Often it is when we try to do something that we are not comfortable that we get distressed.

    Do you journal your thoughts? Mainly to discover what you truly want. The circumstances may not allow you to get what you truly want for now but if you have a clarity in that, that may be a starting point for you.

    Try look for small things that are under your control and do it your way, the way you want it.

    Do you like your job? Can you find things in your job that you truly love to do.

    Take care

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