Thinking about you and your son, Alessa. Hoping your son is better and that your courage gets you from one moment to the next 🙏🤍✌️. Anita

“Keep my head down at work”, you wrote.

Maybe there is a middle way, Tom, in between those loud, screaming and shouting personalities at work AND keeping one’s head down?

A middle way that Tom can do very well before he turns 40?

🤍 Anita

Hey Peter:

From a Zen perspective, you say, self-trust is about trusting the ground beneath, the roots, the canvas.

Using an imagery I particularly like would be that I, as a wave in the ocean, one that rises (lives) and then falls (dies) can trust the ocean that’s always there, before and after me as an individual.

To be present in the moment and let it ✨️ unfold. To not rush to escape the moment, to rush toward something else, but to stay.

As to your second post, Santa 🎅 is Form, a child’s wonder about Santa is Formless. The formless is real even though the form isn’t.

So, if you had a child, Peter, and he or she came home from school upset after hearing that Santa isn’t real, what would 🤔 you tell the young child?

🙏 Anita

Thank you, Peter for your message for me. I appreciate you caring to answer me. I am looking forward to reading and replying later🙏 ✨

I Good day, lol

Hi Peter/ Everyone:

“’Who is to say what is right or wrong?’ becomes less a philosophical claim and more a mirror: why am I so quick to want the answer to be one way or the other? What in me wants certainty…?… shame is already present”-

Indeed, I’ve been quick to want an answer to who’s right and who’s wrong. The part of me that wants certainty is the part that’s been chronically uncertain and self-doubting. And shame has been heavily involved: if I am bad or flawed or inferior, incapable… how can I trust myself (my thoughts, feelings or actions)?

I read somewhere: When someone feels shaky inside, they may grab onto strict rules, rigid beliefs, or black‑and‑white thinking as a way to steady themselves. The rigidity isn’t real confidence — it’s a shield.

Zen would say that the tighter someone holds onto certainty, the more fear is usually underneath. People who trust themselves don’t need everything to be fixed and definite, but people who fear being wrong or inadequate often rush toward clear answers because ambiguity feels threatening.

In this way, the craving for certainty becomes a way to avoid the discomfort of self‑doubt, even though the real strength comes from being able to stay open and present without needing guarantees.

Any thoughts about self-trust Peter? Alessa? Thomas? Roberta? Anyone else?

️🤍 Anita