Hey Zenith:

Talking about patience: I lost mine on the walk with Bogart about 20 minutes ago. He pulled hard, I gave in, and he walked down into a ditch, insisted on eating who knows what (makes me nervous, don’t know what it was.. ), wouldn’t listen to me telling him to come up from the ditch and when he finally did, his leash got caught in sharp blackberry vines. I was so exasperated😠😡😤, I felt like leaving him there and then, unable to free himself. I yelled at him (then felt guilty).. eventually, I managed to untangle the leash and took him home, cutting the walk short (only 1.5 miles)

I’m still recovering from the emotional upheaval, sitting on the lounge chair with.. Bogart lying down by my feet with his head over my leg. I’m still angry though.

I’m glad that your cat is more patient than the both of us 🙂 and hope that you get to take some kind of vacation somewhere local this year, a change of scenery, away from daily stressors 😌

🤍 Anita

Hey SereneWolf (previously Addy) 🐺

I didn’t want to interrupt the current communication in your other thread, so I am posting here just to let you know that I searched for that winery Serene Wolf sign but didn’t find it in my gallery. I may have erased it but didn’t remember, or otherwise it disappeared.

But the memory of it is still on my mind, and in a way, it made you.. locally famous in this neck of the woods.. for a whole week 👍👍👍

✨️ Anita

Good 🌄 Confused 🙂

By feeling “none of those things” for yourself, you mean.. can you elaborate on those things: what are they?

And by “same here”, you’re referring to which part of my last 2 posts?

🤔 🐝 Anita

Do you see you (“a bit fragile and innocent”) in her. A projection, something people do all the time?

This may be too heavy of a question.

Much older than you, Confused, I can feel my own fragility and Innocence. It doesn’t scare me anymore: to be fragile and vulnerable. It’s only human.

I hope I’m 🙏 making sense

🙏🤍💧 Anita

B Back to u in a few hours, Confused <

Good 🌄 Confused:

I think that your insight last night (your Tuesday early morning) is the first significant insight (one that can make a positive difference) since we started talking.

You wrote: “I guess I’m too selfish focusing only on my feelings!”-

I think the word is self-centered (tunnel-visioned) rather than selfish. But point is, you’ve been locked-in, consumed by what you don’t feel (or don’t always feel), and what you “should” feel for her, feeling guilty, so much so, that you didn’t notice that she often feels good because of you.

What if every time you’re troubled with what you “should” feel- you shift your focus and remember a time when she was joyful because of you: when she smiled, when she was kind, etc. It could be like throwing water 💧 on the 🔥 of I-should-feel-but-don’t-feel thoughts.

💧💧💧 Anita

No, not selfish.. maybe tunnel vision, not seeing the bigger picture: that in her mind and heart you’re the bee’s knees, and that’s her reward.

Do you know the saying- the bee’s knees?

(🐝 🐝 don’t have knees.)

Thank you for using my preferred emoji 🙂

🌙 🎊 Anita

I like it that you like how I framed it 😏

It didn’t occur to me either until I posted it: it feels good to feel kind and generous, and that’s indeed her reward 🎁

And I’m not surprised she feels loving and kind and happy because you’re in her life. I happen to feel happy every time you post here 😊

🌙 🎁 🤍 Anita