How are you, Calm Moon 🌙?

You are very kind, Mollie 😊. Thank you. Hope to speak to you soon, anytime 🤍

Good morning, Confused:

I was confused yesterday but realize this morning that the questions I asked you yesterday require emotional access you don’t yet have because of your emotional shutdown.

At one point last evening (my last message to you), I thought you were avoiding my questions, not realizing you weren’t yet able to answer them.

I was trying to help you name what you feel, but it may have put you in a position where you feel that you must “perform clarity” for me.

Instead of asking you to define the pressure, fear, or responsibility (cognitively demanding questions given your emotional state), I better shift toward trying to help you notice rather than explain, asking questions that don’t require clarity — only observation. Here are two such questions:

1) When you think of being responsible for her feelings, what sensation comes up?

2) When you imagine her needing you, what’s the first thing you feel — even if it’s numbness?

🤍 Anita

Hey Confused:

I hope that you will “feel consciously” what you need to feel consciously ☺️

May the Force be with you, Confused (it’s a Star Wars saying).

🤍 Anita

You lack empathy, Zenith? This is not at all my experience with you.. hmm. Well, even if you don’t feel empathy or emotionally mature/ regulated (it takes humility to acknowledge that, Zenith. I am I’m pressed!), you can learn what to say and how to say it in regard to your kiddo (regardless of how you feel).

And ChatGPT can help with what to say and how to say it in different parental circumstances (Be away from the computer for a while).

🤍 Anita

Butterscotch sounds so cute. I bet Butterscotch 🐱 and Bogart 🐶 (both names start with a B, another coincidence) would have gotten along very well if they got together (under our supervision, of course 🙂)

ChatGPT helped you in regard to Butterscotch’s behavior, I bet it will help you understand and deal with your kiddo’s behavior.

I don’t remember being in a concert.. must have been when I was a teenager or in my very young 20s when I attended one (a vague memory).

Christmas for me- not.. anything. Didn’t celebrate (I generally don’t celebrate holidays except for Thanksgiving, and even that- not much.

(I will soon be away from the computer for a while)

🤍 Anita

Dear Zenith:

Reads like you’ve been withdrawing socially so to lower your stress level, and that’s understandable. It makes sense.

About your defiant kiddo, I highly recommend that you have a conversation (back and forth) with AI. I use Copilot. Tell it about your kiddo’s behaviors, what she says and in what circumstances, and you may be amazed 👏 by the input and advice you will get.

Actually, you can tell it about what you mentioned about socially withdrawing and get AI’s input on that. If you do, I’d be very curious about what comes up for you as a result of such conversations.

🤍 Anita