Hi Kim…sent you an email…xo

Gosh I don’t have much sage advice here… We girls tend to over think this sort of thing! I say don’t think about it anymore…move on and let go. It sounds like you made great progress with healing (I can’t wait to get where you are!) so focus on that progress and keep moving forward!!! I am cheering for you! xo

YAY!!! This post fills me with such hope! I am going on a little over 2 weeks post break-up. We were together for over 2 years. Damn…I miss him terribly and am trying to just get through each day. The pain still lingers…and I almost cried in Trader Joe’s tonight…something reminded me of him and I almost lost it. I too am digging deep…taking this break up as a lesson. I have pretty good self esteem and want to make sure that I really nuture myself right now. My thought is that God took him out of my life to bring me someone better. In time though…the thought of dating right now makes me sick to my stomach. I am so glad you are going on that vacation! You do deserve it! And thank you for this hopeful post!!

xo

Oh my gosh…I could have written this myself! wow… I came out of a 15 yr emotionally abusive marriage…and feel in the love with “the one.” “The new guy” was amazing…treated me so beautifully, took me on trips, our kids loved each other! 2 weeks ago he decided he needed “space”. WTF is space???? He was not ready to commit to what I wanted. OMG…talk about worlds crashing down. I am still devastated. We exchanged all of our things last week…have not spoken on the phone. My kids are so freaking sad about this too…they were very attached to him. So now what? I am trying to heal…

Looking back, I saw the red flags…I felt him pulling away. I knew something was wrong but I was to afraid to face it. I did not want to be alone.

So now the soul searching has begun. I am reading “A return to Love” by Marianne Williamson…it’s life changing. Also, her podcasts (which are free! on iTunes) are so healing to listen to. I am re-connecting with God and spirit (which I lost in that relationship…I gave my boyfriend the power). I am learning to love myself first…and learning to trust in something “bigger” than me. Don’t get me wrong…this is so very hard. I have gone 2 days without crying…but the ache is still there for sure. But the one thought that is carrying me is: “there is something better for me out there.” And there must be something better for you too.

My advice…read lots of good healing books. Learn to love YOU first! Meditate. Connect with your spirit, or God or Buddah, or whatever works for you. Cry. Then tell the universe to take your pain and help you heal.

Sending you much love and light as you heal!

xoxo

This has been such an inspiring thread… Today the ex came by the house to pick up his things and to give me my things (I did this outside…he did not come in). He hugged me and asked how I was doing? WTF? I just stood there with my arms at my side and said nothing. Good God. I gave him back some very sentmental pieces of jewelry that he gave me…I can’t look at them…I figured he can hold on to it or throw it away… I secretly hope it kills him a little to see those pieces and that I gave them back. I know it’s cruel…but I am angry and hurt and this all sucks so bad.

This has been an emotional journey like no other! Shit my divorce after 15 years was not this painful! (that marriage was not healthy and I was relieved to get out…but that’s a story for another day). My recent Ex was very good to me…and that I will miss (I suppose I am missing it now!). So here I am…42 years old looking to mend a very broken heart. I want to sleep again. I want to get through a day without crying. Simply…I want to feel normal.

*sigh*

Thanks for listening… And I am glad you are healing and getting better!

xo

• This reply was modified 11 years, 4 months ago by Carrie.

Oh Jamie! I feel your pain! Just 2 weeks ago the man I loved so dearly broke off our relationship. It was on our 2 year anniversary too! OMG…my world came crashing down. I thought what we had was wonderful…not perfect…but really damn good and solid. He said he needed “space.” He wanted to keep in touch…stay friends…but I just couldn’t. The pain I feel is crushing. Sleep? What is that? The ache in my heart is so deep I wonder if I will ever feel that light happiness I used to carry with me. Tears? I have never cried so much in my life!

But everyday kind of sort of gets easier. kind of. 😉 But I too wonder…did he ever love me? Does he know how much pain I feel? Matt’s response was so comforting. Oh the lessons I am learning! I honor the human spirit so much…I would never want to do to another what has been done to me.

Now that some time has gone by…I suppose I saw the signs. I felt at times something was off in our relationship…but I loved being with him that I just brushed those feelings aside. Playing it safe definitely bit me in the ass big time. Always trust your gut! Always!

So I literally have to scream the word STOP in my head ever time I wonder if he thinks about me. I am killing myself with those thoughts. Or thoughts that he is already moving on and dating other women…oh good God, those thoughts are the worst!

I send you much light as you heal too. The only comforting thought I have is that there must be someone really amazing waiting for me! If God is indeed good then this was meant to happen. I am learning BIG lessons and someday I hope to love the way I loved him again.

xo