This is a great topic, I also wish I could cultivate better self-discipline. Unlike you, splendour, my problem isn’t impulsiveness but avoidance/procrastination. There’s so much I want to do with my life but end up thinking and planning about all these things and never actually do anything or taking action.

Wonderful idea BW!

1. I’m an aspiring writer working a completely unrelated 9 to 5 job. I consider myself a feminist. I live on my own which is both a joy and a struggle.
2. My mom discovered TB first and introduced me to it through her tweets!
3. Nothing in the world makes me laugh harder than my brother’s ridiculous jokes.
4. I live in Toronto, Canada. So my first choice would be to take a tourist up to the CN Tower for one heck of a spectacular view!
5. Everything; I am constantly curious about the world around me! Currently I’m all about learning the ropes of how to live a financially secure life, I used to hate anything about money when I was a kid but now I love reading about budgeting and mortgages and so on.

Hi Barb,

I just want to let you know that you are not alone in your musings! My current partner and I are VERY different in our opinions, in everything from politics to humour to fashion. But we have a lot of similarities as well, and I try to focus on those instead. Being with him has taught me a lot about practicing acceptance, and taught me that you’ve got to take the good with the bad sometimes. But he can still be infuriating sometimes!

First off, I want to tell you that even though I might be a complete stranger I am SO PROUD OF YOU! It takes immense confidence and courage to pursue a dream when you don’t have a proper circle of supporters around you, and you’ve taken major actions to make your dream a reality.

Do you have any friends who are proud of your accomplishments? Can you get in touch with fellow competitors and get advice from them? A mentor in the cycling field would be an awesome asset!

And I know it’s hard to take when it’s the people you love who are trying to bring you down, but sometimes you just have to go it alone. Failure doesn’t mean you should stop and quit, it means you learn and grow and move forward!

I wish I had done what you are doing right now when I was 17, but I knew my parents wouldn’t be supportive so I did what would please them. You’re on the right path!

Hi Helen,

Thought I’d add in my own thoughts:
1. 3 months is a very short time to know someone, I’d never expect myself to trust someone completely at that point! I’ve been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years and while I do trust him a lot, it’s not 100% (more like 90%) and I don’t think it ever will be. The only person I can 100% trust is me
2. Like you, I’m an overthinker and it’s my fatal flaw when it comes to relationships. And one of the things I know about myself is that while I am a normally calm and confident woman, being in a romantic relationship brings out some of the worst in me (neuroticism, paranoia, clinginess, sacrificing my own needs, etc.) My boyfriend told me many times in the beginning of our relationship: “trust me, and don’t focus on negative outcomes”, so I’ve trained myself to forcefully turn my brain away from unfounded worries.
3. I don’t mean to pry, but by any chance are you taking any hormonal birth control/the pill? I’ve found that there are certain brands that made me extremely emotional and depressive and nearly ruined my relationship because I became so wildly unreasonable. Then I switched to a different brand and it was taking a dose of Instant Sanity (TM). 😉 Just something to watch out for in the future if it ever comes up!

Hi David,

I can relate to what you are feeling. I also missed out on the typical teenaged first loves because I wasn’t allowed date until I was finished high school. I went on my first date when I was 25. And in the beginning, I too regretted that I never got to experience love and romance as a teenager. But as I got a bit older, I’m happier it turned out this way. As teenagers, we are young and immature and inexperienced and prone to making bad decisions because we don’t know any better and think we know better than anyone else. If I had dated earlier, I might have made some bad decisions through no fault of my own, but because of immaturity and inexperience. I’m glad I waited until I was older to take those important steps in love and dating.

Matt speaks a lot of truth above: real love is not all hazy summer nights holding hands amongst the fireflies. You’re young, you have a great deal of time to find someone and build that long-lasting partnership with.

This also might be a relevant read for you, I know it is for me: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerance

Just a random outsider’s perspective: the two things that jumped out at me were how much you kept coming back to the theme of helpfulness and charity. There’s no shortage of ways you could express this part of yourself! For example: food + helpful = running your own charity food kitchen, or creating meal programs for hungry school kids.

(When I was 15 I was pretty sure my purpose in life was to raise good children, because that’s what a good girl does. LOL @ past me. ;P)

Hi Alisha,

Don’t let the “supposed to’s” of society and family dictate what YOU want. I know exactly how intense that pressure can be, I got into my first long-term relationship when I was 26, now I’m 33 and still not married but I am HAPPY. But family/society/TV commercials seem to have a problem with my happiness and continually remind me that I will achieve “real” happiness when I marry my boyfriend and start having children. Of course, I DO want to have a family, but I’m running my timeline on my own terms.