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Shae03ParticipantHi Kava!
In my opinion, as much as you love the Montesorri school, I’d keep her where she is. As a teacher myself, I’ve seen situations like this before for the children’s parents and it is a tough one!
She sounds like she is absolutely flourishing where she is, and sure she may do great in a new environment, but she also may not.
I’m personally not a fan of Montessori.. these schools, although they look beautiful, are a private business run model of education.. which means they have the money to splash out on nice aesthetics. You’ll find when it comes down to actual curriculum and students wholistic learning, it’s very similar to the average school.. add a few bells and whistles
Shae03ParticipantHey Peaches!
I definitely vouch for what Anita says about introverts/ extroverts. Myself, I’ve always been fairly extraverted in social situations, and it can definitely come from a place of anxiety and awkwardness. That feeling of needing to fill the space with conversation with whoever is around you! Then later on cringing at some of the silly things you end up saying for the sake of talking!
I definately don’t think being introverted is a bad thing in terms of looking for love. When there’s so many other personality traits out there that can come from a nasty or toxic place, I wouldn’t think twice about it at all. Being your authentic self would be the most attractive thing of all.
I think it’s great your working on yourself and reflecting on your wants and needs as a young adult.
Shae03ParticipantTannhauser, I’ve been quietly keeping up with all your posts over the last year. And every piece of well meaning assistance countless others on here have tried to give you, that you barely acknowledge.. and now again randomly giving attitude to Anita when she hasn’t even posted here.
why are you here on these forums? What do you want to get out of posting here?
Shae03ParticipantThanks for the thoughtful responses, sorry for such a delayed reply. The crazy festive season got the better of me!
Isra – you are very right, I’m glad I’ve kept busy since and time has definately calmed it all down..
i decided to not attempt to express directly to her how it made me feel.. thought about it and she doesn’t seem like the type of person to take on board something that’s said, and I really didn’t want to drag it out!
Anita – it has been a bit up and down the last year! I came off medication in March; which is great. Travelled solo in July which I fell in love with! But life got in the way a bit after that and had slacked off with self care. Which I’m working on and getting back to being on top of it all 🙂
Shae03ParticipantThanks everyone for the suggestions and support 🙂 I can completely relate to wanting some peace away in a career where your always looking after others.. I think that is what I’m excited about the most (aside from the weather! So ready to leave miserable winter down here haha)
ive made myself a little care kit to bring on my hand luggage for the flight with a few things from your tips, I’ll let you all know how it goes 🙂
Shae03ParticipantHaha no worries 🙂 not silly at all!
Totally understandable for you to be nervous when you’re meditation group panders to that a bit.
When I started meditating it was actually suggested by my GP to compliment medication, at the time I was struggling with anxiety and panic attacks. Perhaps it was my introduction to it from a medical and neurological angle that gave me a different view, who knows! It could help you to research the more science aspects of meditation, I know I was amazed at how it physically changes your brain.
As far as sensations, I’ve only ever felt the rested and decompressed feeling afterwards, like you’ve had a nice nap. Honestly, I don’t believe in kundalini/demons/ so I’d say keep meditating, but that’s my own beliefs.
im not familiar with Solfeggio frequencies, I’ll have a google now!
Shae03ParticipantHi Alex,
what was her tone when she said ‘I don’t know why he looks at me”
sounds to me she might like you back, and I’m saying that wants to bring you up to her friends to see what they would say.
Keep us updated!
Shae03ParticipantHey littlered!
Ive felt that before, especially when I first started meditating. I believe it’s nothing to be scared about at all, and most likely just a little bit of vertigo from the combination of controlled breathing and the stillness that you might not have been used to before. Being in touch with how your body feels during meditation would surely exaggerate that feeling.
hope that calms any nerves for you 🙂
blake
Shae03ParticipantHi Sean,
i was so compelled to reply because we are in very similar boats. I’m 29, teacher and single now for almost 3 years after a rough breakup (my middle name is also Sean.. creepy!)
i know exactly how you’re feeling right now, and I know there is plenty of others who do too!
You sound like a great guy, and this part of your life isn’t forever. Even though it might seem it sometimes if you can’t catch a break.
For me, it took a lot of soul searching to be happy single and not tie self worth into a relationship, and that’s something to come to at your own speed. As you said, self confidence is something found attractive, and I think people can pick up on that easily in others. Think to yourself, what is it you’ve always wanted to do /who you always wanted to be, and never had the courage to follow through and figure out a plan to that path. The passion it brings out in you, people will want to gravitate towards your positivity.
Your part about being crueler, I get what you mean but probably wasn’t worded the greatest. You see girls chasing the bad boys and wonder why, it’s the confidence those type of guys have that is appealing, not the jerk attitude..
hope this helps! Keen to hear back from you mate
Shae03ParticipantHi guys, just wanted to update for anyone who might be reading this and hits home for them. I’ve been doing really well, and this weekend I begin tapering off my medication (under doctors super vision, as he felt I was ready) which I’m really excited about.. not that I disliked it, just happy to be taking that next step.
What I found to be the most beneficial was definitely the CBT, meditation and exercise, but also pushing myself out of my comfort zone.. finding old hobbies and ideas that got put to the back of the priority list because of life, and building myself again the way I want my life to be.
i also found the book The Power of Now to be quite helpful, there was a couple of a-ha moments I took from there.
i found listening to stories from people who had overcome it, and how they did to be motivating.. that there is people around us in our lives who understand and have moved on without seeing anxiety as a label to burden themselves.
so anyone who is struggling, there is a light at the end and keep taking time and being kind to yourself, you are so much more than anxiety it’s just a hurdle to understand and move across
Shae03ParticipantHi Anita,
That’s a good question. It has been brought up, and although origionally I did pin that to be the starting cause, I’m starting to believe that was a point of manifestation of anxieties that I had developed over time.
I’ve been able to realise the core of my anxiety to be low self esteem, and when the relationship became toxic, my self esteem and perspective of myself contributed to it, by not walking away when I should have walked away. By allowing myself to be treated poorly, I was subconsciously affirming my own perspective of my worth and feeding that cycle of low self esteem.
This revelation is honestly very new, and can be hard to get my head around sometimes!Shae03ParticipantThanks for the words Peppermint,I’ll have a look into autogenic training. I have found being a love again of just being outside in the nature, a kind of meditation in itself I guess!
Shae03ParticipantSorry for the delayed reply guys, work has kept me busy lately!
Sol sys – thanks for your story, it does really help hearing something so similar doesn’t it. I found it funny once I opened up to a few close friends about it, how many have told stories of being in the same position in the past.. one of those things that sadly is still not spoken about.
I’ve been on medication for just about two months now, I was pretty nervous to begin with having no experience but honestly I am so glad that I did. It worked quite quick too, I’ve read 6-8 weeks, but all the strange side effects of my body adjusting pretty much subsided by two weeks. It was explained to me like it creates a clean slate in your mind to be able to take cbt on board and it does really feel that way.
Day to day triggers I couldn’t tell you! It felt absolutely random. I’m in the process at the moment of unpacking the core problems that would create the different anxieties in life, it’s interesting being able to slowly put the dots together.
I’d love to hear how you’ve been going!Shae03ParticipantHey,
Couldn’t see if you had written the age group of the kids you teach.
Obviously the certain students who are making these noises and wriggling are doing it unintentionally.. Perhaps you could set up a system for them, give them brain breaks when they get to that point of restlessness, a couple of minutes away to refresh themselves so they can come back.
I work in the primary years and this really works for them.. Also, having fidgety objects for them, theres certain types of chairs you can get now specifically made for kids with ADD where they have little balls on the bottom of the legs, so the kids can move around to help them concentrate.
Hope this helped at all!Shae03ParticipantHey mate,
I really hope you find the change of perspective your looking for. I can see your struggle to articulate and communicate on here, due to your Aspergers. I think this is the big hurdle you need to face.. This may sound ridiculous, but I think you should research theatre and acting, there are lots of studies that have show participation has really helped people on the ASD to clarify their communication skills and understanding of body language. I think I remember reading you mentioning that to be something you struggle with.
Honestly, I think that’s where you need to go to next. Building that confidence in social situations, and confidence in social situations.
Have you been to therapy specifically for your autism? Or do you still do it? -
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