I just wrote a research paper on depression and physical activity. Allow me to shed some light on a paragraph I wrote in conjunction with Tony Robbins’ TED Talk speech: Why we do what we do. Probably one of the most moving and inspiring talks I watched:

Emotion is a powerful tool that we use at our disposal regularly. In a TED Talk presentation, Tony Robbins (2006) describes emotion being “the force of life” (1:13), and without the right emotion, we are just simply existing with no intent or purpose. If emotion is harnessed accordingly, it is possible to find the courage to transform our intentions into actions, or in other words, it is “how [we] take the invisible and make it visible” (3:16). This transformative process requires us to make three crucial steps regularly that will guide our intentions to unfold: applying a focus towards something, finding meaning in what you’re focusing on, then taking the appropriate action (7:48). It is in that moment when we employ meaning onto something that emotion begins to unfold within. Furthermore, if we bring forth the right emotion, we can tackle any obstacle in life that lies in front of us, even if it means starting an exercise program to help lessen depressive symptoms. By focusing our minds on a goal, finding meaning behind it (producing an emotional response), and taking the necessary steps forward, we can unlock this “invisible force of internal drive” that has remained dormant for so long (1:07). I believe that by applying this three step process at a conscious level can help an individual overcome their depression and take the necessary action to change themselves.

I hope this helps.

All the best to you elliott. Feel free to message me if you want to read my entire piece. I cover physical activity and depression from a personal stand-point as well as from research material also.

I did not, my tag is @spidey . I’m not quite sure how the format of this forum still works as I am use to other ones.

If you want to specifically reply to me in response to my post just acknowledge me with a “To Brett” or “To Spidey” in this thread, or if you can send my profile a personal message or however. Using the “reply” button and “quote” button doesn’t seem to work properly.

Reply button doesn’t work. Tried it in a previous thread and no go.

If you want to specifically reply to someone Stefan, try “@________” before you write a paragraph or two. So we know who you’re directing your post to.

You can’t solely rely on medication to overcome depression. I literally just did a research paper on physical activity and mental health, and one of the studies explored the effects of pharmacological substances and exercise in treating depression. The control group just took the drug treatment whereas the test group was prescribed an aerobic activity plan while taking drug treatment. The group that was both taking medication and exercising had a substantial decrease in their depressive symptoms as opposed to the group just taking the drugs.

Point I’m making: you need to be proactive! You can’t sit around and just hope things will work, and by taking a pill you will feel better. Be proactive, make the change, get up and start moving! Sitting around and feeling sorry for yourself isn’t going to do you any favours. I know this through experience, and it isn’t fun. But you have to be willing to change yourself. If you don’t do so, then what are you doing? Just existing and relying on hope to bring you out of the rut? No, you need to act! First step is acknowledging there is a problem, second step is putting a meaning behind and producing an emotional response, and thirdly it’s acting on the emotional response (the “now what?”). By doing this accordingly, you can get out of any situation or circumstance you’re in.

But it has to start with you!

Stefan,

You haven’t hit rock bottom. Have a shelter over your head? Have food in front of you? Have clothes? Have a bed? Mate, a lot of people in this world don’t even have anything like this. One thing I’d strongly suggest you doing (which btw I’ve started doing and I’ve been feeling eons better) is writing gratitude lists. Every day for the next week write a list of what you are thankful and grateful for. From the smallest things in life, to the simplest, to the most complex. I guarantee you that by doing this and reflecting on these lists you will begin to feel much better.

In terms of your anxiety, I can strongly say that it is possible to overcome it. Coming from someone who suffered stuttering over my early school years and developed anxiety when speaking up in front of people, I have managed to down-grade my anxiety to be very minimal now. I even catch myself in moments where I am fluent, and can introduce myself fully without a thought of doubt. This is tricky, but it requires a lot of discipline to overcome. And it starts off training your subconscious mind. It’s hard to understand and explain, but one of the bigger things I’ve did was just not think about it. When I would focus my mind on my anxiety, my fears, my stresses, my body would adapt accordingly and before I knew it, I would be in full anxiety mode, and it sucks. What I did, however, was that I acknowledged my anxiety attack happen one time, and I literally had an out of body experience where I looked down on myself in the scenario I was in, and realized my triggers. By doing so, I was able to catch that transition point between calm and tranquil, to heightened/alert/anxiety state. In that transition point, it is there where you need to harness your physiology and calm your body. But you can’t avoid scenarios that will trigger anxiety. To overcome it you need to expose yourself to these scenarios and try to adapt every time. It is scary, I know, I’ve been there, but it is possible.

Stefan, I literally made this account in response this thread because I want to help you to overcome this scenario. I couldn’t ignore reading your opening post knowing someone is going through this and here I am not acting to help out, especially being in this same scenario at one point.

I wish you all the best, and if you want to keep in touch message me, and I’d be more than happy to help you overcome this.

Cheers,

Brett.

He was wrong in just going for it and not telling you up front what he wanted, but instead, he did it after the fact playing a mind game with you, and that isn’t cool.

He should have been straight up with you right from the start before getting physical. This would have dropped any expectations and mixed emotions right from the beginning.

In your scenario though Anyone, it sounds like you’re uneasy with having FWB and he isn’t. That being said, tell him up front and be honest. If you don’t want it, say it. And if he wanted something more with you he will hang around and respect that decision. If he didn’t, well he will probably just end up stop talking to you. Ultimately, do what your inner voice is telling you to do. And stand by it.

Hey everyone. I’m Brett. Recently just signed up and looking to be a part of a like-minded community. Frequenting tinybuddha for quite some time now, and always found good reads on here. Anyways:

1. Describe yourself in three sentences.

I am compassionate and caring. I am honest. I am determined and ambitious.

2. How did you first come across Tiny Buddha?

Reading insightful articles via google searches and having this site being the most common one that popped up all the time. Recently just shared an article on Facebook and began browsing through the community.

3. What makes you laugh?

Geek and nerd humour especially! Witty puns, lame jokes, all these things make me laugh in hysterics.

4. If you had to show one place where you live to a tourist, where would it be?

Vancouver Island, British Columbia. Great outdoors, amazing scenic parks, small, quaint communities up and down the island. An outdoor enthusiast would love it here.

5. What do you like to learn about?

I am very passionate about health, fitness, and wellness. I love to read material on bettering yourself whether it’s psychologically or physically, and I love learning and discovering all that there is to know about the human potential, knowing the knitty-gritty stuff on how the body works both psychologically and physically.