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Tannhauser

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  • November 10, 2017 at 5:50 am in reply to: My Spiritual 'Phase' is Over #177467
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Reading through your post You seem to have equated your expectation of ‘the good’ and projected it onto a deity that is out there… somewhere in space and outside yourself. When you describe the deity he/she/it sounds like an alien being of some sort. If such an alien being existed we would in deed be screwed as we could be nothing by playthings to such a being and it would be highly unlikely that we would worship he/she/it showed up on earth one day.

    Then we are indeed screwed, because there are beings which exist ‘out there’. I am a plaything to them. I was never informed as to why they have ‘invaded’ my life, or for what reason, and I have little choice but to tolerate it or end up in a mental institution. Perception and reality are two different things. Basically, religion sanitised Pan and Dionysus; it took a force of nature, a free spirit, and put it into a box. Want to know why man is obsessed with sex? Because his Creator is obsessed with it too. This reality shattered my twee Victorian chocolate box perception of Heaven for ever. They are sex mad up there. They must indeed laugh at humans trying to be spiritual with their temples and self-appointed gurus. This is why my spiritual phase is over.

    I was FAR more happier when I drank, smoked, ate meat, went fishing, etc.,…

    I feel the same. I was happier in my younger days before I got involved with religion and spirituality. And really, that’s all that life is about. If you are happy and contented, then you have discovered the secret of life, you don’t need spirituality for that. Chasing after a god however, will only bring you bitterness, frustration, isolation, depression and mental exhaustion. I thought I was on a ‘spiritual path’, but it ultimately lead nowhere and my life seemed to get worse, not better. There was no ‘eureka’ moment.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    • This reply was modified 7 years ago by Tannhauser.
    • This reply was modified 7 years ago by Tannhauser.
    • This reply was modified 7 years ago by Tannhauser.
    July 29, 2017 at 2:40 am in reply to: Something Strange is Unfolding Upon Earth (FAO 'Lightworkers') #160870
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Well, I shall leave you all in your ignorance and your spiritual play-acting then.

    Goodbye,

    Tannhauser

    July 28, 2017 at 9:47 am in reply to: Something Strange is Unfolding Upon Earth (FAO 'Lightworkers') #160758
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Well, more than a month later, virtually no one on here really got to grips with this topic, and that’s because Tiny Buddha is more about giving relationship advice than anything else. Well, all I can say is **** you. However, here’s one factor you won’t be able to ignore: increasing cases of suicide and suicide attempts.

    That’s because the world, animals and humans are going through a change, an awakening, and some people just won’t be able to live with the strange feelings these changes will bring. They will find the new conditions uncomfortable; they will think they are going insane and will want out, like I have wanted out several times in the past four years. You will hear about depression and especially suicide/suicide attempts more and more.

    Watch out for it.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    July 23, 2017 at 8:40 am in reply to: Does life have any meaning? #159694
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Comparing humans to animals is false. Animals have no sense of their own mortality and are not burdened by morality. They are not cursed as we are with an over-evolved brain, something which is the source of all our mental health problems.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    June 28, 2017 at 8:07 am in reply to: A bit lost, spiritually speaking. I don't "fit" in. #155390
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Personally speaking, God is much less of an issue for me now then He/She/It was a few years ago. We shouldn’t project human values and characteristics onto the spiritual realm, for it is not like Earth by any means. My problem is now with humans. I am sick of being enslaved to the whims and demands of others, and the more one wakens, the more one sees just how demanding and attention-seeking human beings can be. Is it not enough that I as a spirit should be imprisoned in this cage of flesh, unable to fly where I will, that I should also be shackled to the will of others who demand my immediate attention as and when needed? And I am not talking about basic needs such as looking after children, but of the necessity to conform and comply without question, both to individual and group requirements. Such a thing is hellish to a spirit.

    I am really waking up now to the true reality of the situation on Earth, and it is horrible. We think we are free, but we are most certainly not. That is why more and more people are becoming confused, depressed or angry. I am increasingly being drawn to the Gnostic worldview, and I believe very strongly that this could be a prison planet. I had an out of body experience/dream last year. The experience straddled both the dream state and out of body state, so that it was difficult to gauge the actual reality of the situation. But at the point in the dream at which I knew I had left my body and could see it on the bed, I tried to fly up through the roof and out of the house. This was almost a natural response or instinct. I only left the ground by a few inches, which meant I was tethered here in some way, unable to leave. I then returned to my body, lay on top of it and woke up. Draw from that what you will.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    June 23, 2017 at 3:02 am in reply to: Something Strange is Unfolding Upon Earth (FAO 'Lightworkers') #154636
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    you must first come to terms of who you are and what you want from life.

    That’s the problem. I don’t know what I want from life. And I don’t really like who I am, if I am being honest.

    Other people’s religious beliefs are, and have been, a safe harbor for them to go to for whatever reason they may have. Their particular practice of their chosen religion is a choice they made for their benefit. For them it works.

    Well, organized religion has been useless to me in all the experiences I have had. As there are career politicians, so there are career priests. They have never failed to disappoint. When I needed their help, they told me to get out more or see my GP.  I ended up being humiliated. (Humiliating those under their ‘care’ is something that men of the cloth are particularly good at) I shall never put any trust or confidence in organized religion ever again. It’s all basically play-acting theatre. There’s nothing really spiritual about it.

    I still have energies pouring into my body most days. They enter through the head, go through the body, and exit via the palms of my hands and my right big toe. The energies can cause considerable bone joint pain, and I lost an entire night’s sleep the other evening because of it. I just had to go and sit downstairs for the duration. But, of course Pearce, it isn’t real. I must have imagined it.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    June 21, 2017 at 6:59 am in reply to: Spinning during meditation #154402
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Hello,

    My experiences have been unsettling to say the least. Today as I type this I am getting energies flowing continuously into my body which makes my joints ache and which has swollen my belly and feet. I am not a very happy person at the moment and have taken to walking round the house in bare feet, something I never do. I am also getting a very dull ache in the centre of my forehead. This is the Kundalini I warned you about yesterday. It is real. Forget the Christian bollocks, the Hindus have got it right. There is nothing in Christian doctrine nor in the Bible which mentions Kundalini, but it is a fact. As I said yesterday, Kundalini is a life-force energy or force of nature.

    In my case the Kundalini started on its own accord after a very traumatic period in my life that lasted nearly ten years and really screwed up my outlook on life. It wasn’t caused by meditation, although I believe it can be brought on by it, which is why I am warning you.

    I don’t believe that 10-15 minute meditation sessions would cause any problems. I was talking about the intense, prolonged sessions which Buddhist monks and the like undertake.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    June 19, 2017 at 9:31 am in reply to: Something Strange is Unfolding Upon Earth (FAO 'Lightworkers') #153986
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    It doesn’t matter. It’s all too vague, too niche and far too secretive.

    In short, it could all too easily be dismissed as bullshit.

    Tannhauser.

    June 19, 2017 at 7:54 am in reply to: Something Strange is Unfolding Upon Earth (FAO 'Lightworkers') #153958
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    A wall of silence then.

    Tannhauser

    June 19, 2017 at 7:48 am in reply to: Spinning during meditation #153956
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    I urge you to leave off doing meditation. Breathing exercises are fine, but prolonged meditation can produce results which may alarm you. When you meditate, you are tapping into an energy, a ‘life-force’ that comes in through your head.

    Don’t approach this lightly, and don’t listen to people like Shae who think that Kundalini doesn’t exist. I can tell you from personal experience that it most certainly DOES exist, and it has the potential to turn your life upside down and leave you with severe anxiety, depersonalization, derealization and mental problems.

    I won’t touch meditation with a six-foot barge pole. It can cause more problems than it solves. I once had the experience you described whilst meditating, although I was oscillating back and forth rather than ‘spinning’.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    June 9, 2017 at 2:53 am in reply to: My persona is dying. #152506
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Hello PearceHawk,

    I very much agree with your sentiments. I know I have some very negative personality traits and I am trying to address them. I accept I have got faults and flaws.

    My main problem is my deep distrust of organized religion. Even though I am an active church organist, I have misgivings and doubts about it all. This mainly stems from contact with the clergy. As I have said before, I think for a good deal of them the priesthood was simply a career choice and nothing more. It wasn’t a ‘calling’, and in fact my parish priest openly admitted that he didn’t know why he had become a priest and wondered if he had made the right choice. Then there was the priest whose church I used to play at occasionally for funerals and weddings. He mysteriously disappeared for several weeks, and we only discovered later that he had been viewing child pornography on his computer. To think that I had often spoke to this individual and helped him out on the altar makes my flesh crawl.  And now the latest experience with priests has only cemented my deep suspicion of them. I have been experiencing strange things, things that cannot be explained rationally. So I had hoped that the Catholic Church would help, but the exorcist I spoke to did not want to do his job and told me to see my GP. This is no good to me, for I know I would be putting myself through unneccesary medical tests. I think that in the end I will just walk away from religion altogether. These people are a disgrace.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    June 7, 2017 at 3:15 am in reply to: My persona is dying. #152248
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Fingerist, I desperately want my life to return to normal. I want happiness and contentment. I have had enough of chasing after God and spiritual things and I just want to be like I used to be prior to 2013.

    Unfortunately, I can’t do these things. I am in the middle of something strange and frightening. Energies keep coming into my head and they pass through my body. These energies have caused me terrible mental anxiety in the past 6 months, but what they are doing now is even worse: they are causing a deep emptiness inside me, particularly in the stomach area. It is as if there is a void there, and it causes me to fill it up with food and drink. It really is horrible and it is consuming everything.

    The Catholic Church is a fraud and a joke, it’s priests merely play-actors. They aren’t spiritual in the slightest. In fact, I think for many of them the priesthood was simply a career choice. I have personally come across too many poor or bad priests in my time. Priests who were exorcists but who don’t wish to be bothered on their day off. Priests who viewed child pornography on their computers in their spare time. Priests who openly admitted in the pulpit at Mass that they didn’t know why they had become a priest in the first place and wondered if they had made the right decision. These are the last people anyone should be going to for help, especially the vulnerable.

    I personally don’t believe in the Christian God archetype anymore. I think it is a childish concept. I have gone through such unprecedented levels of anguish and suffering in the past few years that I think the idea of a ‘loving Father’ is plainly ridiculous and an insult to one’s intelligence. There is no God out there. There is NOTHING except the Universe. That’s the one thing these energies bring with them: nothingness. And it is very scary. The more these energies come into me, the more empty I feel. The energies often make me feel like self-harming.

    And in all these four years, not one person has offered ANY explanation for what I have experienced and how I might alleviate it. No one has helped in the slightest.

    Thanks a lot.

    Tannhauser

     

    June 6, 2017 at 7:18 am in reply to: My persona is dying. #152096
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Yes, my persona, my very essence, is dying.

    I just tried to practice my harp for an hour. I didn’t enjoy it, it felt forced. I used to love my music but I don’t think I can do it anymore. I think I am finished because there is nothing I can identify with. I am empty inside and it scares me.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

    June 6, 2017 at 5:53 am in reply to: My persona is dying. #152082
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Oh certainly, my Catholic beliefs are dead. And they are dead because God/Universe perhaps wanted me to see a bigger picture.

    You mentioned a ‘shaking’. Here’s what Taoism says:

    Tao means a road, path, way; and hence, the way in which one does something; method, doctrine, principle. The Way of Heaven, for example, is ruthless; when autumn comes ‘no leaf is spared because of its beauty, no flower because of its fragrance’

    This has certainly been ruthless.

    Best wishes,

    Tannhauser

     

    June 6, 2017 at 3:08 am in reply to: My persona is dying. #152074
    Tannhauser
    Blocked

    Thanks for your input, Anita.

    I think the answers to all my problems are going to come from Buddhism/self-mastery and not Christianity. I have been shaken by my experience of the latter, because I have come to realise that some priests simply don’t fully believe in it. Being a priest seems to be more of a career choice than anything else. Yesterday I spoke to an exorcist about my experiences.  He told me to see my GP. To be honest, I don’t think he could really be bothered dealing with the problem because it was his day off.  It took a LOT of bravery on my part for me to do that because I knew they wouldn’t believe me. But I had to try, I had to satisfy myself that I had done everything in my power to address the situation. If this ‘thing’ ends up driving me to commit suicide I at least fought it as hard as I could. And no God will dare judge me for it.

    That will be the last time I EVER look to the Catholic Church for help. I wonder to myself what use is such an institution if it merely plays at being spiritual. I think that in the end it will be overtaken by scientific argument, rationality and reason, because it has already accepted them.

    You are quite correct. A person needs a support system for this. But there is none. This is why Lord Buddha struck out on his own. He had to. It seems I am being encouraged to create an entirely new belief system free from religious dogma, which is why my experiences often included Pagan and even Norse Heathen gods. (It seems God/Universe is all inclusive, but religions want to stick a label on Him/Her and claim Him/Her as being peculiarly theirs). Please do not equate God(s) with religion and doctrine. God(s) does NOT issue threats or demands. God is a liberator not a punisher. God is life, not death.

    You don’t need a religion. Everything you need is inside you.

    Best wishes, and thank you for your help,

    Tannhauser

     

     

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