@Sammy1 thanks for your very kind words. It means a lot to me to know I’ve done good from you, you were here since my first post.

Ahaha, hands up beneath the bravado, I am a cheesefest and hopeless romantic,  I’ve never had anyone appreciate that sensitive side. Most women want treat them mean, keep them keen but with ‘B’ she appreciates every aspect of the real me and doesn’t make me feel inferior or less macho. I love spoiling her. She spoils me more probably, it’s an incredible feeling. I will take heed of your advice by being consistent, I don’t want this feeling to ever fade for us.

How are things with your new partner? Why are you thinking about your ex? It’s pretty straightforward…

An honest man would admit that if you shared real feelings with a woman, it’s impossible to stay actual friends!

It’s too damn hard for us men. It’s not just the sexual desire, sometimes talking to an ex can stir feelings in us especially if there’s unresolved feelings there. It becomes painful beyond belief to watch from the sidelines when those feelings can’t be acted on. Most of us give up hope here and know any friendship will be fake.

But there are some men, like your ex who may cling to hope that you’ll date again. I’d say your ex might just be biding his time thinking you are rebounding and would at least bang if the opportunity presents itself. Tread carefully. You know his character better than anyone.

I think you women are emotionally stronger, that’s why you’re better at being friends afterwards.

Rarely do you get a situation like ‘B’s’ ex it’s an exception to the rule. I trust ‘B’ because she’s so mature, I know her character and how principled she is. Although I’m dubious about him as I don’t know him well yet, one boundary ‘B’ and I agreed on is never to discuss any potential issues be it marriage or personal with any exes. So their relationship is very neutral. I’m not going to stop it as that’s controlling and would be projecting my own insecurities.

Personally I’ve chosen to have nothing to do with my ex. If I’m honest, I do hold a small place for her in my heart, she was my first “love” but I don’t trust her character after the betrayal so although I’ve matured greatly, I don’t want her in my circle because she could potentially cause issues.

I invited her as an extension of my best mate. He’s been pushing hard to repair our relationship and I do miss him, he was a great friend since childhood until that happened. I have forgiven him now after therapy and bit by bit looking to repair our relationship.

Thanks Sammy for highlighting that, if I’m ever having an internal meltdown, I’m going to re read that point and reframe any insecurities. ‘B’ chose me, being so beautiful inside and out she dated many better options but I captured her heart. The other men should be jealous!

Ahaha horny rabbits…. you’re hilarious Sammy. I am extremely grateful the physical side lived up to my expectations, sex is very important but honestly the best thing I ever did was listen to @Tim1,my brother and Anita on my original thread.

With their wisdom they advised me to marry her. It was difficult because from the very moment I met ‘B’ it was sexual attraction, I couldn’t keep my hands off her.
Everytime I was around her, I was in a state of non stop arousal and didn’t understand what she saw in me. Waiting and learning to control the carnal desire in a way I had never before actually opened my eyes to all the qualities I was ignoring, in the end when I allowed myself to fall that golden heart is what I fell in love with.

I knew she was a minx but combined with that golden heart is was connect us deeper during intimacy, it makes it so special and there are no inhibitions. I’m on cloud nine.

I am no longer avoiding confrontation, I don’t mind annoying her after what it’s led to ahaha!

@Rhaenys thanks for the lovely suggestion. Look how many bad days I had, but I’m riding a wave of elation and I’m sure there will be more bad days coming my way too but keep working on yourself and don’t settle because you’re tired or just want a partner. Find someone who meets all your physical and emotional needs. You can only find that if you know who you are and start to love yourself accordingly.  It will all make sense one day.

I wish I could stick around longer to help you further but after my quarantine ends I will not get the time as much so I would hate to leave you hanging.
I sincerely apologise.

I hope @Sammy1 or @Jay2023 can keep this thread going to help you.  Best of luck and if you want to ask me anything for next few days you can. I’ll respond.