Posts tagged with “wisdom”
No One Deserves to Be Abused
“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” ~Kahlil Gibran
You’re stupid. You’re a loser. You’re worthless. You will never amount to anything. You’re not worthy of love. These are things I’ve told myself throughout my life.
The experiences I had throughout my childhood led me to believe I was deeply unlovable. I thought that because I had been abused and ignored, there was something seriously wrong with me.
That’s what abuse and neglect does. It seeps inside you down to the deepest level. It changes you in every way.
You begin …
Being Busy Made Me Feel Important, But Now I Feel at Peace
“You should sit in meditation for twenty minutes a day, unless you are too busy, then you should sit for an hour.” ~Ancient Zen proverb
I used to think that life was about powering through things. I’d grab a latte, write my to-do list, and proudly cram as many things as possible into my day.
At work, there was staff, payroll, invoices, customers, marketing, and the occasional cleaning of an office bathroom. At home, there was parenting, dinner, cleaning, homework, bedtime, laundry, and plans for the next day. When my eyes could no longer remain open, I’d fall into a …
How to Fight Well in Your Relationship
“Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.” ~Rumi
I had one of those really intense arguments with my partner recently, and it made me realize the importance of knowing how to fight well in a relationship.
That might sound like an oxymoron, but there isn’t a relationship I know of where the couple doesn’t fall out at one point or another. Fights can make or break a relationship. That’s why it’s important you know how to fight well—because the success of any relationship isn’t based on how well you manage the good times …
Why Some Things Trigger You Emotionally and Others Don’t
“If you’re hysterical, it’s historical.” ~Anonymous
I had been having problems with my email. I dreaded calling technical support, since my experience in the past involved sitting for a long time on hold and listening to someone reading from a script instead of thinking creatively about my problem. However, since I could not fix the problem myself and I felt I had no other options, I called my Internet service provider’s technical support line.
True to form, after thirty minutes on the phone we had barely moved past the point where I had repeated my name and account number to …
Why I’m at Peace with My Weight Gain
“Resistance keeps you stuck. Surrender immediately opens you to the greater intelligence that is vaster than the human mind, and it can then express itself through you. So through surrender often you find circumstances changing.” ~Eckhart Tolle
I took a deep breath, feeling the recent change in my belly. I pinched at my belly rolls. They were familiar, I’d had them before, but recently I had gone through a period of over a year where I was in a smaller body. Now I was gaining weight again.
I refuse to step on the scale, so I don’t actually know …
How to Just Be: 5 Life Lessons I Learned from Watching Sunsets
“Never waste any amount of time doing anything important when there is a sunset outside that you should be sitting under!” ~C. JoyBell C.
“You need to just be.”
At the time I didn’t understand my teacher’s words. My identity entwined itself with my ambition.
I fought inner emptiness by overloading my calendar.
I fought loneliness by never leaving time to be with myself.
I fought depression by trying to do more.
None of it worked.
And the answer repeated itself, quiet and strong, “You need to just be.”
Fortunately, my teacher was too wise to only …
Confrontation Can Be Hard, But It’s Worth It
“When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary.” ~Fred Rogers
I was immediately uncomfortable when the older gentleman rode up on his bike and loudly told us that our kids shouldn’t be riding their bikes on the velodrome; it was against the rules.
If it had been just me and my daughter, I would have said no problem and left the area, maybe even apologized. But I wasn’t alone, I was with my friend and her son, and my friend doesn’t back down from confrontation like I do.
Instead of saying okay …
Why I’m Trying Harder to Be Kind to Strangers
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” ~Leo Buscaglia
From uttering unkind words to sleeping with unkind men, I’ve had many moments of shame in my life. Still, there is one particular moment of shame that stands out from the crowd. It happened at least ten years ago, but I remember it as if it were yesterday.
I was strolling around downtown Toronto with a visiting friend when a rough-looking …
When Someone You Love Is Grieving: How to Really Help
“The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.” ~Henri Nouwen
It’s hard to stand at the edge of someone else’s grief.
There’s the awkwardness. You always feel a little like an uninvited guest who arrived late and missed the first half of the conversation—a conversation that turns out to be a wrestle between another person …
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 