Dear Anita,

A quick update – in the meantime my girlfriend decided to come see me for a few days.. to figure things out she said. Well.. let’s see about that. Also yesterday I’ve been offered a job in Warsaw. I’ve had a couple interviews during the last 2 weeks and now they presented me with a contract. They want me to decide pretty quick.. until Monday end of the day. Well.. I’m considering asking them for more time to be honest.

I find myself in a very confusing situation. I could take that job, move to Warsaw in March and ( if my girlfriend rents a flat ) live with her. She said she would rent that flat only if I have a work contract – which I didn’t like to be honest. It all feels like a transaction to me. Now… There are many questions. Actually no.. there are only a couple of questions:

1) Do I want co continue this relationship? – this feels like 50/50.. Part of me wants to try and hopes things will change.. the other part is just tired of this circus – tired of her mother’s presence, of living in a country that I don’t like much.. being disconnected from the friends I have now here. There I have no friends at all.. I would have to really make an effort and find likeminded people, community.
2) Do I want to work in a corporate structure? – this is something I don’t resonate with at all and it feels like I’m betraying myself.

Going to Warsaw and working for Satan would help me get financially independent. Also I’ll be living with her.
But I don’t know if I still want to…
I don’t even know how to decide.

It’s funny – she arrives on Monday. The same day I’m supposed to make up my mind about the job.

Have a nice evening Anita!
Robi