Dear anita,

congratulations for having these photos taken, a printed memory of … love, lovely!

= thank you anita, i really am grateful of that photos!

nothing you can do about that, but notice that her sister (the girl you are dating) likes your physical appearance, and that is wonderful, isn’t it?

Im not really sure if she likes my appearance or not… i dont really know why she’s interested in me…. Maybe she’s just grateful that i came into her life?

I can put together a list of questions (or you can do it on your own) so that you can prepare your answers ahead of time.

= i’d be happy if you’d like to arrange some few questions… it can be helpful to me…

you told me earlier that you are a follower. Seems like she is a follower too. You know how difficult it is to change in this regard, so please don’t get angry at her for being a follower and don’t demand that she changes.

= This is what im concerned about, she’s a follower and she looks up at her sister… if her sister said something negative about me, that girl might lose interest in me… just like how there are few boys who try to get close to her, but her sister told that girl to not be with those guys as their environment and personality are not too good….

I havent met her sister yet, but i feel like she texts me differently since her sister went back home to our city few days ago… idk if its just my feeling or she really has been different due to her sister…

Or maybe it could be because that everything between two of us are predictable now that both of us know each of our feelings… and everything became more boring than the first month when we interact…

To avoid exhausting my head, i should just think what’s meant to be will be… is it?

seems to me, that her sister approves of your physical looks and of your relationship with her sister; otherwise she wouldn’t send the photos to her friends, don’t you think?

= i dont think so, she could be sending the photos to her friends because she disagrees that her sister is with me… and she wants to discuss it with her friends….

I suddenly feel so sad and disappointed, im not ready for another heartbreak…. I did everything i could, but if she does change because of her sister, i cant do anything about it… Or is it because i demand too much from her….

I suddenly have thoughts that she’s having dinner with her parents before her sister go for holiday with her future husband without telling me…. If she really does that i’ll be really disappointed, like really really disappointed, because she used to told me that i should come to meet her parents every time her family has a dinner outside their house…

Tomorrow we are going to have a date, i hope she doesnt suddenly cancels tomorrow’s date because im going to overthink a lot if she does that…. Making me sure that my assumptions is correct…

Dear anita,

your girlfriend has liked you consistently for a long time. If her liking you was so far conditional on her sister not saying anything negative about you, then so far, her sister did not say anything negative about you. Do you agree with my logic?

= yes if u explain it like that, i do understand the logic…

Today i just finished the date with her, i feel like i did mistakes (i know you’d think this is just me overthinking things, but i feel this is a mistake) and also there is a feeling that i never felt before, as i think i feel “unloved”… would u like to hear about it?

EDITED PART (The above one was confusing, so just read this one)

Dear anita,

Before i explain the facts that happen yesterday, i’d like to thank you for always listening to my stories… i really am thankful…

– The list of facts that happened yesterday are:

So yesterday on my meeting with her, before arriving at the restaurant, i asked her why didnt she invite me to eat with her parents? Isnt she told me before christmas holidays she’d like to invite me.. i asked her if her family has a dinner before her sister and her boyfriend went on holiday and she told me there is…. I told her why didnt she invite me… she told me at that time she was told after she finished her uni on 8.30 pm and immediately went straight to eat with her parents… her sister told her to invite me… but she didnt invite (not telling me) because it was really rushed, because she was informed like that and i used to told her i dont like things to be rushed… Should i be disappointed? As if i meet her sister that time maybe i can give a good impression…

The second fact that happened is that she told me her aunt texted her asking if she’d like to get to know a guy.. this guy is close to her aunt… Her aunt doesnt know that she is close to me now, so her aunt give this girls whatsapp to that guy so they can interact…. (I’d like to say what i felt her but u requested for me to only spill the facts, so i wont explain how i felt here)… And that guy would text her, but that girl told me she wont bother him. If i remember correctly, she told her aunt that she’s close to me now.. and her aunt told her “ahh too bad, that guy is a bit late by a few months”

Her sister told her, “wow it looks like your flower has bloomed a lot this year, that lots of guys chase you”….
Who wouldnt feel pain hearing these stories right?

– As for the mistakes that i did

I told her that my mom met her sister in a formal event….

Here’s an explanation,

So my mom is a friend of her sister’s boyfriend mom… Let’s say her boyfriends name is A. So i used to told my mom before i chase this girl, that i plan to chase A’s girlfriend’s younger sister… but i told my mom to not tell A’s mom because it would low my dignity as i dont know A… and it would make it seem like i look highly of A that i discussed about him when he doesnt know me….

Then last week my mom attend a formal event, and met A’s mom, they sit together in a table in which there is also her sister.. My mom talk a lot with A’s mom and also communicate a bit with her sister… but my mom didnt tell her sister that she is my mom (as i requested her to not to)

So yesterday when that girl told me that her aunt wanted her to get to know a boy (the guy that is close to her aunt)…. I feel sadness and anger, in which that guy has a support which is her aunt, so immediately felt that i need a support so i told her that my mom met her sister in a formal event… i told her this so that her sister will know that my mom is friends with A’s mom… so she will know im not some random guy who just wants to get close to her sister and i have a good background and my presence would be more convincing,

idk if this will lead her sister and her to find out that my mom and me has planned and discussed about them before i get to know that girl, it would be embarrassing isnt it? Like i really regard highly of A, i even dragged my mom into this…
Her sister might also wonder how my mom know about her…

– Regarding the unloved part,

So this week that girl is in her exams period in uni so she is stressed, in yesterday’s we didnt talk a lot but i still feel like she still loves me, its just that its not equal to my efforts… as on yesterday’s dinner before i went on a holiday today… i bought a cake for us to celebrate advance christmas… but she didnt give me much attention…. She’s too focused on her uni and we went back early because i need to wake up early and she needs to submit her assignment….

She also told me next year she will have more assignments and have to work on her thesis…  she told me to please bear that she might often reply late as she will be more stressful and busy…

Luckily on yesterday’s dinner i can still hold my sadness and disappointments, so i still smile and act normally… although i keep asking her regarding that guy who her aunt wants her to get to know…

As a person who never has any experience in relationships, im confused on how to handle all these pressures at once….

Moreover, adding all the facts and problems above makes it even more stressful to me…

Dear anita,

Before i reply to the threads above,

I just wanted to say i feel that girl is maybe bored of our relationship… Like i can see the difference on our texts before i confess and right now’s situation…. And if she’s bored with our relationship right now, she doesnt do anything at all….

She’s on holiday with her parents these past few days, but still im the only one asking how’s her holiday, but she never asks me…. And she still replies late… i know she still have assignments but still how can it be everyday….

She didnt even tell about her routines on her holiday, i need to ask her then she replies… but then she still didnt ask how is my holiday…

I can see the difference in the chat, she’s really happy at the moment i confess to her that day, her texts are really happy… it’s not like that now… its different…

I dont know if this is her personality or she’s already bored… i also dont want to keep asking her questions that will make her tired of answering… so i just keep it to myself…

but really i’ve done my best… i even plan a surprise for her after holidays… I try my best to make her happy on every occasion we meet…

Few days ago, before i went on holiday… she told me that if we have known for many years… its okay if we have dates without talking to each other, just eating quietly… I tried to trust her words… But right now we just knew each other for 4 months, and she wants to talk quietly already?

I remember she once said, in highschool days she is not sure with her crush then she slowly fades away from him, idk if she’s doing that on me…

Do u still think this is me overthinking things?

Do u think i’m handling the situation wrongly?

Anita, After interacting with you throughout the years i feel like you understand me… and i want her to understand me too… and i want to understand her too… but right now it’s the other way around, i still dont feel she really understands me…

But tbh, with all my previous crushes… i always suspect them whenever they reply late without informing me first….

Maybe im too demanding? Like i always want her to constantly texts me good morning and good night….