James: I am withdrawing from this thread and will not participate in any thread you have started or will start. I see no opportunity for a dialogue with you. I give up.

Plus, I am concerned for other people interacting with you because “Real Spirituality” (the title of your thread) is really.. ‘Spiritual’ Abuse and Authoritarianism.

Anita

Hi James
You said that you found that a life of fame & fortune etc did not bring lasting or much happiness. My words “sickened with samsara you searched & found…….thru a combination of psycadelics & meditation ie getting to the destination using a jet plane. Now what? you wish to share & help others?
I choose to walk the journey & may or may not get there, as I see it the path & destination are one but not the same.

I hope you find a skillful way to show/impart any kernels of truths in a compassionate & timely manner to those that can see & understand in a compassionate & timely manner.

Hi James,

My son is good. Doctor’s said that many child can have tycacardia with birth, but it will pass when he gets older.

I’m glad your son is well. I’ve asked because when you presented it, your sounded like it was a big concern. You mentioned it in the same sentence with the fact that you had an open heart surgery and have a mechanical valve and a pacemaker. Here is the full paragraph:

i had an open heart surgery, right now having a mechanical valve and pacemaker (therefore lost my entire modelling career) and my son diagnosed with tycacardia. So, Life and body have it’s own will. Realization of Truth came with lots of suffering.

It sounded like this is causing you a lot of suffering: both your own condition and your son’s condition.

You also said elsewhere: Life is suffering.

So I felt compassion for you because I thought your life is hard, that you have a debilitating condition which is limiting you in many ways, which may be specially hard for a young person like yourself. And so I thought that your physical condition and the difficulties that ensue from it are the reasons why you have strange views about life, body, death, etc.

You were saying things like why care about your body when you can get killed in a car accident anytime:

The core of stress is expectations. For instance, you eat healthy, work out and did exactly what is main media says about “living healthy” and you have car accident and get paralyzed. Won’t it be more suffering for you, because you did everything right, yet everything turned out to be unexpected way?

Or:

No matter how much self-help you get, one piece of bad news can shatter your whole world.

So I thought that something like that happened to you: that you were living a healthy lifestyle, taking care of your body and all that, and then one day, your heart gave up. And that out of the blue, your entire life collapsed. And that it was a huge shock for you, and you feel bitter and disappointed. And that you concluded that all is in vain – all care, striving, doing your
best, etc.

Sure, all of those were my assumptions, based on what you have been sharing here. However, during the course of our conversation, I’ve realized that you hadn’t been actually living a healthy lifestyle, and that your heart problem didn’t come out of the blue, but as a result of heavy drug use.

So your remark that “why make any effort when you can lose everything in a moment” doesn’t actually refer to you, because nothing like that happened to you.

Anyway, what’s quite surprising to me is how you reacted after having a brush with death – after having a heart surgery that saved your life. You said it was a wake-up call, which compelled you to search for the truth. And I totally understand your sentiment.

However, the way you went about this quest for truth is quite peculiar: max dosages of hallucinogenic drugs, and then putting yourself through a torture of 365 days living in isolation and darkness. Which I don’t think is a smart decision for someone with a heart condition. (BTW I’ve never asked you how come you actually chose that route, and why you thought that you can only find the truth that way: by basically separating yourself from the life on this planet for a full year?)

After a year spent in isolation and darkness, you’ve emerged on the other side with a set of peculiar beliefs, which sound like dissociation:

Body doesn’t belong to me.

Any given name or experience or feelings belongs to body and mind. Mind and body is not me.

The one who had surgery wasn’t me, it was the body.

Body feels pain yet there is no one to suffer.

Not only do you feel separated from your body and mind – you also believe that this condition is called love:

About experience of meditation that, when recognition happened that any experience belongs to body and mind, therefore no one to there to claim. James is dead. Therefore, Body feels pain yet there is no one to suffer. And that’s what Love is.

According to you, love is a dissociated state, where showing any care for anything in this world (be it for your own body or your own feelings or other people’s feelings) is considered the sign of the ego:

To do something try to protect to heart is more stress to heart.

Try to take care your body and cause more stress. You have no idea how free and beauty it is without you.

Health life, more laugh, going to gym etc… Purpose of all these stuff underlines one thing. Survival. And in %99 of these people are extremely afraid of death

Many of you here to say kind words or saying ah darling you are so good stuff or heart emojis stiff… But all is a lie.

So any kind of caring, according to you, is an expression of the ego. If we here on Tiny Buddha express care and kindness towards each other, we’re in the ego and we’re lying to ourselves.

Those are the beliefs that you’ve been propagating on this forum, James. But I don’t think they are a sign of enlightenment.

No spiritual tradition teaches that love is expressed by detachment and not caring. Unhealthy attachment is of the ego, healthy caring and compassion (including self-care and self-compassion) are divine.

You are putting so much stress on you. I can see from your questionings.

Yes, I wanted to understand you, James. I did care about you and your physical condition, as well as your son. But I see that you’re not in so much physical pain and suffering. Which is good, and I’m glad about that.

So I’ll quit trying to understand your story and your pain.

As for your beliefs, you might find them helpful and they might be working for you (at least for the time being), but I don’t think they’re helpful in general, or reflect a deeper truth about life.

Anyway, I wish you and your son all the best, including good health!

Hi James,

Of course, your love in this forum is not true (most of the people here). Because, if I say something bad or tough (I talked like that to show you guys what separate self is), you guys just get angry and protective. Love doesn’t depend on circumstances or situation, love is the moment. Therefore, your love is a game of ego.

Excellent, James, for protecting your ego even more from the onslaughts of truth 😉

BTW, Jesus reacted differently to scribes and Pharisees and money changers, and differently to people in real need… his love wasn’t always the same either…

Hi James,

I just say one sentence that you guys love is a lie telling here love, I love you and kisses. And all of you is attached or get protective. That mean is you guys doesn’t need a nice words or kindness. Because, if someone who really needs a kind word is not in the place to get angry, they just become quite.

you seem to have forgotten why you came to this forum: not to give a kind word to others, but to lecture others about the “ultimate truth”. Whoever didn’t agree with you was told that they’re living a lie and not ready for your “superior wisdom”.

In general, people on this forum start topics not to preach and impose their beliefs, but to seek help and advice about some real-life problem with which they’re struggling. And whoever does that is met with a kind word, empathy and compassion by other forum members.

You haven’t come here to honestly share, or to seek help and advice, but to preach and impose your beliefs. And when you’ve received some pushback, you’re accusing us of being angry and protective instead of just staying quiet.

Well, I don’t feel like staying staying quiet when someone puts me down and makes untrue claims about me (and other people). And this is what happened here, just so there wouldn’t be any confusion…

Hi James

You can philosophise all you want.

Miracles are not news to me. There is no point being proven. 🩵

How can you help people you don’t even know? 🩵