Edit:  my answer: depends if you feel anxious/ distressed or calm at the moment you consider drinking followed by drinking (and being aware that you decided earlier not to drink). If you feel calm, it’s a choice; if you feel anxious, it’s an impulse, an act of desperate need to be calm.

Dear Danny

Why do you wish not to drink – once you have a clear understanding of the why then it is easier to abstain.

You could write down why you chose to drink ie a friends birthday party and what & how much you drank and any negative outcome like argument with girlfriend, bad hangover or failed to go to work the next day.

You may start to see patterns forming. If you go out for a couple of beers and are home in bed by 11 and function well the next day  and you are doing this 4 or 5 times a week you may choose to limit it to once a week or a month for health & financial reasons.

You may notice that when keeping company with certain friends you drink more. You could choose to still see these friends but change what you do ie instead of going to a bar for the whole evening, go bowling instead. You could also drink shandies instead of straight beer or larger.

Some may say that it is your ego that leads you astray & it is your ego that mentally beats you up after you have been drinking & regret it.

Dear Danny:

“I could (should) be doing more with my time. I can often be lethargic the day after a few beers… I’ve always been extremely hard and critical of myself“- how does being extremely hard and critical of yourself affect your use of your time: does it make you energetic or lethargic, motivated or depressed, productive or wasteful of your time and resources?

“I’m not sure if drinking is a mistake, or is it more a choice. If it is a choice, and not a mistake, do I need to be hard on myself?“- some people consider drinking any amount of alcohol at any time to be a mistake; others consider drinking in moderation not a mistake, but a positive thing; almost everyone (while sober) considers drinking and driving a mistake.

Here is a question for you: can you make a choice to learn from your experience, improve your functionality and productivity, and at the same time, not be hard on yourself?

anita

What drives you to drink? Is it hunger as it is for the one who is on a diet? Is there a hunger for the alcohol? There are rules against drinking alcohol. Do you break those rules? If not then it is a choice you made. You are responsible for your choices. If you break the rules then it is a mistake. Is it a mistake like breaking rules against bank robbery? Obviously not completely. But, it sits in the realm of those mistakes. Drunk driving, fighting, not being where you are suppose to be (work), etc. Do you need to be hard on yourself if drinking is considered a choice? It was your choice. But, as I said before, your choices now are the foundation of your future.