Menu
Announcement: Wish you could change your past? Learn to let go and create a life you love with the Tiny Buddha course!

It Could Be Far Worse

“If you count all your assets, you always show a profit.” ~Robert Quillen

This weekend someone broke into my apartment and stole everything of significant monetary value that I owned.

They stole my jewelry box, with pieces I got from my boyfriend, his mother, and my sister, after she’d gone through a break-up and wanted to unload a vast collection from her past. They stole several purses in my closet, and confusing it for another, also took my makeup bag.

They took my laptop bag containing my new MacBook, my wallet, my passport, my glasses, and my boyfriend’s old iPhone, which I’ve been using to play games. They grabbed a stack of DVDs, though I can’t remember which.

Lastly, they took my hamper, after emptying it on my bedroom floor, to carry all their loot. Oddly but thankfully, they took nothing of my boyfriend’s.

That night, I’d been at a neighbor’s house with a few friends, peeling lemons to make limoncello. I was supposed to be in New Orleans with my boyfriend and others for Jazz Fest, but I’d backed out after my doctor told me it wasn’t wise, so soon after my surgery.

When I walked into my bedroom after arriving home and saw the clothes on my floor, I wondered why I would have done that. I hadn’t yet noticed the other missing items, and I just assumed if something was awry, I’d done it and forgotten.

Then I started looking around and realized someone had been in my home. My heart started racing, my face went flush, and the tiny hairs on the back of my neck stood up. I wondered if someone was still there, hiding, waiting, or watching.

So I ran downstairs and called my neighbor, who came right over with the others. Thankfully, they did everything for me. They called the police. They called my apartment community’s security. And they even wrote a checklist of things I needed to do, including canceling cards and setting up credit monitoring alerts.

Later that night I realized the burglars hadn’t taken my old laptop, which still had most of my documents and photos saved. The next day I found my passport, after remembering I’d finally realized it wasn’t smart to carry it with me daily.

Suddenly, I felt an immense sense of gratitude because despite what I’d lost, it could have been far worse.

I could have lost everything related to my work. I could have been left with no ID. I could have never bought renter’s insurance. And the worst possible outcome: I could have been home when this happened.

I could have been the victim of a far more tragic crime.

But I wasn’t. I was alive and well, with friends looking out for me. And I had the capacity to do everything on their list—to follow each step one by one and put things back together.

Sometimes when things go wrong it can seem overwhelming to make things right. But the amazing thing is that we usually can. We can put together the pieces. We can do it even more effectively if we stay calm, start with one simple step and remember, eventually, it will be all get done.

I didn’t sleep much on Friday night, and I didn’t feel well on Saturday, when I went to my bank and Lens Crafters for new glasses. But today as I write this on Sunday, I am well rested and I’m here—still alive, still loved, still doing what I love.

Any time we can say that, it’s a beautiful day.

Photo by ayaM MLE

Avatar of Lori Deschene

About Lori Deschene

Tiny Buddha Founder Lori Deschene is the author of the Tiny Wisdom eBook series (which includes one free eBook) & co-founder of Recreate Your Life Story, an eCourse that helps you get unstuck & change your life. She's now seeking stories to include in her next book, 365 Tiny Love Challenges by Tiny Buddha. Click here to share your story! For inspiring posts and wisdom quotes, follow Tiny Buddha on Twitter & Facebook.

Announcement: Want to share your story in the next Tiny Buddha book? Learn more here!
  • David Ashton

    Ouch. I’m glad it wasn’t worse. The same thing happened to me a few years ago. It was a great source of lessons in letting go and forgiving :)

  • Anonymous

    I am so sorry to hear about this but glad you are staying strong through it with a positive outlook! Thanks for another inspiring post!

  • Jade

    Oh my goodness, wht a time you’ve had! I had a similar situation where I was robbed while undergoing emergency surgery. It’s wonderful to see that you have such a great attitude. Hang in there!

  • Jinyan Chen

    Sorry to hear about what happened.  You are very brave and the trouble doesn’t overwhelm you. I hope you will find your lost things

  • http://thecheekofgod.wordpress.com/ Brian

    Holy hell.  

    I had a dear friend who was robbed blind several years ago, and she’s never really recovered.  I’m sure that’s exactly what you want to hear, right?  You, however, seem to have put things in a proper perspective, something she was unable to do.  

    Peace to you as you sort through what remains . . . 

  • Roo

    wow Lori, so such a disrupting event and it leaves you feeling so vulnerable that someone came in and took your things and was in your apartment. I had my bike stolen off of my front porch once. We had a big, high fence so it meant that someone had to have watched me bring it in and waited for me to leave. You have a wonderful perspective that yes, it could have been far worse (for me too) and they are just “things”. It is the sentiment you attach to them, the memories and all the hard work on your computer. But, so glad they didn’t take your old computer and that you are ok and have good friends to help you through it. 

  • Truealignment

    Lori,

    Thank you for sharing this and for affirming the importance of seeing everything from the highest perspective. This is so important. It effectively transforms the situation and means that you do not take on the role of the victim and keep re-playing the drama in your head.

    I can relate to this. One summer several years ago, my husband and I took several weeks off to go traveling in Europe and we arrived back to find that our cottage had been broken in to. We discovered that after breaking in, the thief kept coming back and taking off with everything from the TV and stereo system to the flatware in the kitchen. He even took the bed linen and used the pillow slips to bag his items. It took us weeks to itemize what had been taken, I would look for something and then realize, “Oh it must have been stolen.”

    For me, the upside of this was realizing how unimportant material objects are and how quickly everything can be taken away. From that moment on, I became much less attached to things and instead began to value the treasures I had ‘inside,’ which can never be taken away.

    Oh and we also installed better security!!

    Hugs,

    Juliex

  • http://www.bluecollarworkman.com/ TB and BlueCollarWorkman

    I’m really sorry that that happened to you,but you quickly came to the right mindset.  You are still a complete and whole person, you have your friends and your health. And who knows, maybe that burglar was trying to pay for the lack of health of someone in his/her family (?). It’s never okay to steal, but maybe you unwillingly helped someone out, too.

  • Dashaadgriffin

    Absolutely Beautiful! And in this your purpose was met. Truly inspired and feeled with Gratitude. Thank You.

  • http://about.me/krishaddow Kris

    Sorry to read about your misfortune Lori, but glad to hear your ever-strong support network is there for you.

  • Linda H.

    I’m sorry you were violated in this way.  I’m glad you are safe, because that is the most important thing, for sure.  As you recognize, in the big picture, things can always be replaced. 

  • Artemis

    Oh Lori, I’m just so glad you are okay! These things happen in life but keep your chin up. Sending many positive thoughts and blessings your way. I am glad you have a positive outlook on this event. Remember, your readers on Tiny Buddha will support you in any way we can. God bless and wishing you many joys.

  • http://www.prolificliving.com/blog Farnoosh

    Same sentiment here, dear Lori. Glad YOU are OK and what a grounded amazing attitude you have. You inspire me!

  • http://journeyofasoulsearcher.blogspot.com/ Madison Sonnier

    I’m so glad you’re okay! As soon as I read the first sentence of this post, I was like, “Oh no!!!” 

    I think you handled this situation extremely well. It can definitely be hard to stay calm and think rationally when something traumatic happens. I’m sorry about everything you lost, but the most important thing is that you are okay. <3 Take care of yourself. 

  • http://uzma7.wordpress.com/ Uzma

    God bless you with greater strength and peace. Rest well, heal well. :)

  • JamesSimon

    Lori, I’ve been through this and my heart goes out to you. We should ALL realize that things can almost always be worse and feel gratitude for what we have each day. Sending positive karma your way.

  • Victor

    My goodness Lori!  I am so sorry to hear about your awful experience, and at the same time very happy that you are okay, and that nobody was hurt.  It must have been a frightening experience, and very hard to shake and/or recover from.  Continue to heal well!  Take care!

  • http://www.facebook.com/joseph.barbaccia Joseph Barbaccia

    When something similar happened to me the “violation” of someone entering “my space” was far, far worse than the loss of any material thing.

    Glad to hear you’re feeling better.

  • Michelle

    Though I’m sorry to hear about this happening, I am very glad to hear you’re all right. And even more glad to see that your perspective is such that you didn’t let your whole day, week, month or year get ruined by this one event. Such resilience and positive thinking, thank you for being the example!

  • http://www.thepowerofreceiving.com Amanda Owen

    Glad you are OK, Lori. Sending good thoughts your way.

  • http://www.facebook.com/patriciabreathe Patricia Nelson

    Mercy!  I’m saddened that this happened to you.  I’m amazed and inspired by your response.  Thank you for sharing this with us – it’s a big learning for me this morning, and I appreciate you.  May all beings benefit from your wisdom and compassion.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/CG652JCW33L4L6ULB6C3GHB4QU Keri

    Im so sorry that this happened to you.  It can be very unsettling.  Bravo for recognizing the blessings

  • Catlevine

    I am also so sorry that you had to go through this.  While the burglars took many things, they only took things.  You still have what counts.

  • Genevieve

    Excellent attitude Lori, but sorry to hear your home (and sanctuary) was broken into.

  • Mom2Luke

    Here’s an idea, Lori, contact the marketing dept of you renters’ insurance and see if they’re interested in exchanging your deductible for the rights to reprint this blog!! It’s a great testimonial to the importance of renter’s insurance AND being grateful for all you have. Best of luck and thanks for your blog.

  • Tana Franko

    Also sorry to hear about this but glad that you seem to be recovering your momentum so quickly.  Hope you are healing well.  As always, thanks for sharing.

  • Cynthia

    Hi Lori,

    I am so moved by your strength and perspective on this terrifying experience. You are an inspiration! My thoughts and prayers are with you as you recover from surgery and this experience.

  • Meghan

    Hi Lori,
    I read your blog every day and it is a constant source of encouragement to me. Needless to say, I was shocked to read this post! I am so sorry that this has happened to you, but you’re right – it could have been far worse. Still, I don’t think I would react with the same grace and strength, and I admire that about you. Best wishes to you and thanks for being so positive :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/heimdall.seven Heimdall Seven

    I hate to say this but this really sounds like  someone who actually knows you a friend  or acquaintance or coworker who knew you were suppose to been out of town or least one of you were gonna be. Also it might been someone who had more a connection with your boyfriend as a friend or acquaintance of yours if his stuff was easily recognizable for a reason why none it was taken. If someone you know  drops off the radar suddenly or acts odd or avoident with you suddenly it’s a good  chance it is them. People don’t realize how  often burglarys are actually done by someone the victim knows.

  • Carrie Haigney

    thank you for sharing this story… so glad you’re okay :)

  • Areli Pedroza22

    very good way of thinking..=) keep the positive, it truly makes you a stronger person..=)

  • Lisalisa46

    WOW Lori!!!  Glad you are OK and they left some of the important stuff!  I had a similar situation where I had to move suddenly.  I lived in a bad neighborhood at the time – a place where you had to watch out for the people you KNEW, rather than the ones you didn’t.  I packed the important stuff in one day – my dog, phone, computer, jewelry, etc, – and some of them helped me, knowing I would return a couple of days later for the rest.  Of course, when I got there three days later, most of my other stuff was GONE (doors and windows suspiciously STILLED locked from the inside.)  And, others on the block stepped forward to tell me “who had been coming in and out of my house” for the last week while I was gone.  Anyway, I said out loud to anyone within hearing range,” that whomever had stolen the rest of my things must have needed them more than I”.  As I drove off, I realized that I meant it – and that I still had everything that was important to me!  Anyway, I am glad worse didn’t happen from a scary and disturbing situation.  I know that you will gain it back threefold in the future, as you are such a grateful soul!!!!!   xoxoxo!!!

  • http://twitter.com/tlanswers T.L. Hickman

    I love your outlook on everything, Lori. The Buddha said, “We only lose what we cling to.” If we can value our health, loved ones, and life in general, we can take comfort when the material things are gone.

  • Laura

    What a bummer! Glad you are okay, but still so wrong for someone to do that. I would have gone through ALL my emotions before coming to acceptance. Glad you arrived there so quickly! You have to believe they will receive the right karma coming to them.

    They know what they took does not belong to them, you should check on craigsList or Ebay to see if any of your items show up. (I’ve read the police do that sometimes). I’ve also seen a TV news clip where some one had their Apple laptop stolen, but they had a camera on it, and it relayed the photograph of the person stealing it to the gals phone. She recognized him from a party at a friends house. She did not know him, but the police got her goods returned.

    Good Luck Lori, we are all here for you.

  • Rabbitmoon333

    Oh, SO sorry. I read your postings, every day. They have become an essential part of my, “ritual” to begin my day with.  They are a very important part of my day’s beginning and I genuinely, feel off center if I don’t take the time to read them every day.  You sharing your thoughts and feelings, bits of your soul and your experiences, strengths and hopes–has assisted me in my journeying through, and a good deal of camping out, done, IN the tunnel.
    Which up until today’s reading, I’ve been referring to as, “the abyss that has become my life.” :-)  All that you shared today, has touched me deeply.  You have reminded me-it can be much worse and so I need to find my gratitude.  You have given me hope and I am feeling a bit more at peace, with where I am right now. (I was thinking of the tunnel as a wretched place, I’d been condemned to, for having made so many grievous mistakes for myself, as well as, in the way I treated and percieved and talked about–my former partner.) Yet it’s been here, in this dark place, that I’ve admitted to myself, how very disloyal I can be, how very vindictive, spiteful and indeed, how much damage my anger and discontent with myself, can wound others. I’ve always demanded Fidelity and yet, I have so very little of it in my own heart. Wow. I’ve certainly been examining my soul, here in the dark and yet I’ve been thinking of it, as punishment for “more recent crimes”…and yet, it’s allowed me to see CLEARLY, that my recent past has very little to do with anything in my soul, save that it’s allowed me to find my souls darkest parts, that have been plaguing me and anyone around me, ALL MY LIFE. Oh, my, there’s a long trail of broken bits and bloody patches behind me. Wow. I believe I may be able to begin to change in earnest now. Thank You, so very, very much….for being.  And for sharing all your experiences, strengths and hopes with us all.  You make a great difference in my life, everyday.  I am SO sorry someone chose to violate your space and injure your sense of safety.  I pray you take the latter part back, very, very soon.  Thank You, it is with your help, that I’ve been reclaiming my own peace of mind and heart.  Namaste, Dearest Tiny Buddha, Namaste.

  • SemayawiBeth

    I was the victim of a similar crime, and totally understand the feeling of violation. You’re right however, you were lucky as it could have been worse. Sending peace to your heart and mind, and I’m glad you’re ok. Things are just things; the meaning of those things remains safe in your heart.

  • Victoria

    I am sad this happened. When I went through a transition time in my life it occured to me to imagine that all had been lost in a fire, it helped.
    Praying for your continued recovery and peace.

  • Pamela Jorrick

    Yikes! So glad you are OK!

  • Taste_of_italy

    Lori, I’m so sorry to read this!  Likewise our home was broken into while we took three of our children out for dinner as a treat.  It took years for my kids to get over the trauma. They wouldn’t set foot in the house until the lights had been turned on.  I wish I had the wisdom that I have now, and I would have handled the situation entirely differently.  You have an amazing attitude and I love reading your encouraging blog. May you continue to have gratitude and peace as gifts that help you continually to go on day to day…Namaste.

  • Kyah

    Lori,

    I send you comfort, understanding and support. Thank you for sharing honestly. Thank you for modeling acceptance beautifully. May this event birth a fountain of blessings.

  • kai4p

    Wow!!! You’re so inspiring! It’s amazing what you go through while still maintaining a good attitude. Thank you for modelling this way of being!!

  • Nancy

    I am glad that you weren’t home when this happened!  Things can be replaced, memories will always stay in our hearts, but genuine people like you can not be replaced!

  • Wendyweb

    Like you Lori we were robbed then end of March while in Italy at the end of our holiday. Thieves broke into our car and stole 2 suitcases,coats, glasses alternate charge cards, all our souvenirs and most of my travel wardrobe. Like you we realized it is only stuff  and we were glad we had insurance, were not there when it happened and still had our passports. Dealing with the Italian policeman was actually comical like in a bad movie and we were able to laugh after filing our report.

    Others face far worse horrors in their lives so this is small but inconvenient circumstances.

  • Greg Robson

    Glad to hear that you are okay – we’ve never met but of all the emails I get yours are always the most often read.

  • Joice

    Glad to hear  you are okay. All my loving to you.

  • http://twitter.com/AlannahRose Alannah Rose

    Wow, Lori, I am so sorry to hear you are going through this.  That is just so wrong.  I’m certainly glad nobody was hurt and that they didn’t take everything, but that is still so devastating.  You certainly have had to deal with a lot lately.  Your attitude is admirable and I hope there are more positive things in store for you in the near future.

    I also wanted to say how much I appreciate all of the personal things you share here.  I (and so many people) can relate to what you are dealing with/going through and it’s nice to feel like we’re not alone when we face similar challenges.  Thank you for your openness and honesty!

    Best wishes to you.

  • Yousif Anwar

    I am really sorry for what I read, but also very grateful for your honestly and they way you look at the case. I hope that you get all what you lost. You’re SIMPLY STRONG

  • http://www.theadventurecouple.com/ Mantagirl

    It’s a scary thing and the feeling of personal violation is creepy when that happens and you realize someone has been in your house and through your things. I’m sorry that happened to you.

    On a lighter note, perhaps it’s the universe’s way of cleaning out your closet (smile)

  • http://twitter.com/SmittnbyBritain SmittenbyBritain

    Lori, good job remembering to be grateful but it is okay to be pissed off too. Get really pissed off and feel violated. That’s only human and then forgive and be grateful that you weren’t at home. I’m so glad you are safe. M.xx

  • bobbie

    WOW!!  I’m so glad you WEREN’T home, and are OK!!!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    That’s a great idea! Thank you for this suggestion. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Wow–that’s crazy they kept coming back! I had my locks changed, but somewhere inside I’ve been thinking, “I highly doubt they’d come back.”

    I’ve never really been attached to stuff, except for the things that have sentimental value, and luckily, they only took a few of those. Also, I know I have almost everything from my laptop backed up–and that I’ll get at least some money from my insurance–so that helps a great deal too!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Bobbie!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much. =) I was pissed off that night, but on Saturday I decided that they’d already taken my stuff–they weren’t taking any of my time!

    I really do feel incredibly grateful that I didn’t have to go through this alone. There was a time in my life when I was completely isolated and depressed. Although this was a disheartening experience, it confirmed to me that this is indeed a different time in my life, and I am never alone. For that reason, I couldn’t possibly feel more blessed.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Yes, it’s definitely a feeling of violation! But you’re right–my closet is indeed a lot cleaner. It was probably time to clear out some of the old…

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you so much. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Alannah. I think this would have been much more devastating if I didn’t have so many people looking out for me. I think especially since I spent so many years feeling alone, knowing that I am connected and cared for really helps put things in perspective.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Joice. All my loving back to you. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Greg. I’m so glad you enjoy the emails!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Indeed! I’ve been trying to think the same–that it’s a lesson in letting go.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    You’re most welcome, and thank you!

  • Kate

    I echo all the other people have said and I too was shocked when I started reading. Such a lot to deal with just after your operation. I understand what you mean when you say that to feel the support of friends and neighbours and all of us means so much more than the loss of the stuff – sometimes these moments really show us how much we are cared for and that is a wonderful feeling.
    Thinking of you!  Kate

  • http://www.sixsimplerules.com/ David Singer/SixSimpleRules

    I am grateful for the human ability that you displayed, the “It could be far worse.” I don’t know if everyone has it. I know I have it and maybe inherited it from my parents. I’m so sorry you went through this and am glad you have the the “It could be far worse” ability and that you shared this great post with us.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Jade. I’m so sorry you had to go through that!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Jinyan. I think I will get some money from my renter’s insurance, so that’s reassuring for me!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Brian. I’m generally not too attached to stuff unless it has sentimental value. But I know I would be far more upset if I didn’t have insurance, particularly because the MacBook was expensive, and I’m not rolling in cash!

  • sweetborigirl

    I went to through a similar experience but differs in that the landlord of my apartment owed taxes in the property and never told me until I found out on my own when I came home one evening after work and everything was gone to the city garbage dump and a note was left explaining why (house owner owed taxes). I remember how I felt. I was devastated. Living from a low income and with an infant. The stuff that didn’t have as much money value but sentimental value was what hurt me the most. All the loving letters and little gifts from my family (who live very far away). But now I’ve come a long away and see how material things are not as important as I thought and I try to keep the sentimental stuff in my heart instead. I remember some of the stuff written in the letters, I remember the little things sent to me out of love. I try to live it in the present. I know how much I mean to them. Being grateful was really hard for me but I’ve been practicing it. It really makes you look at things in a whole different perspective. I’ve been reading Eckhart Tolle’ book and has really helped open my eyes to see everything in a different way. I’m glad you are safe, and that is something to be grateful for :-)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Yes, it was definitely a vulnerable feeling. I had that same thought that you had–that someone must have been casing my place. I had this feeling someone was watching me earlier in the day at the activity center, so a part of me wonders if it was that person. But still, at the end of the day, it’s just stuff–and I’m just so glad I have all my files. I did lose some work I did last week, but I already re-did most of it!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Maybe. I suspect it’s actually some teenagers, because there have been a lot of break-ins within my community, and many people have reported seeing some kids trying to get into cars and apartments. In fact, someone stole my boyfriend’s laptop from our car last month. Perhaps in this case, though, it was someone who was genuinely in need. You never know!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    You’re most welcome, and thank you!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Kris!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    That definitely puts my mind at ease, to know there was no major long-term damage. It’s really just an annoyance, but luckily, I don’t have to deal with it alone!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Artemis. I appreciate the support!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Farnoosh!

  • http://optimalternative.com/ Mark B Hoover

    Love your attitude, Lori. I can indeed empathize, although on a different level. When I moved north (PA) from Florida I brought what I could in my small car. I left a lifetime of art, photography, my tools, clothes and the rest of my worldly possessions in storage with a “friend”. Indeed, alone and depressed as you had mentioned,when I began to feel I was able to start shipping my belongings to me I called to apologize for taking so long. He responded by telling me he had gotten rid of everything…he needed the space. I had no recourse, other than legal pursuit on civil and/or criminal grounds. Lack of fiinances curtailed that quickly.
     
    I am significantly lighter now, and moving forward. Yet, the betrayal, the loss of so much and knowing the perpetrator, it is all a massive malignancy to forgive and forget. I have regained possessions, but they no longer bear the attachment I had once given what I had owned.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Madison. I think it would have been much more difficult if I didn’t have so much help and support. That really helped!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Uzma. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you James!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Victor! It was indeed frightening. The first two nights, I felt a little nervous about someone breaking in again, but I’ve let my guard down now, so that’s good. I wouldn’t want to walk around in fear!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Yes, that was my thought as well. But luckily, I am feeling much better about everything after getting some perspective.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you so much. I know you’re right about that!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Genevieve.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Tana. I’ve been taking it easy today. It was a hectic weekend, so I really needed some time to just relax.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Cynthia. I figure I can’t control what happens, but I can control my perspective!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Meghan. I appreciate your kind words! It was definitely unfortunate, but now that almost everything is taken care of, I’m feeling a lot better about everything.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    That did occur to me. It felt like someone might have been casing my place, since it happened while my boyfriend was away. However, there’s been a lot of crime in my apartment community lately. In fact, someone stole my boyfriend’s laptop from our car last month. And last night, someone broke into my neighbor’s son’s car (the neighbor who place I visited on Friday). I just hope these people get caught!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Carrie. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Areli!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks David. That’s definitely a helpful perspective for me. I feel much better know I still have the things that matter most!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Kate! I really was just amazed by the support my friends and neighbors offered me. It gave me a lot of peace and strength!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Wow that’s horrible. I can only imagine what it felt like to accept the loss of your possessions, and also know a friend did that to you. I’m so sorry you had to go through that!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    That’s crazy they just got rid of all your stuff like that! Like you, I felt the most troubled by the loss of the items with sentimental value. Though I only really lost a few of those. I love what you wrote about keeping the sentimental stuff in your heart instead. I’m trying to do the same!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    That’s a good point Wendy. Sadly, tragedies happen every day, and in the grand scheme of things theft isn’t life-shattering. (Though I have to admit, having insurance helps a lot!)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Nancy. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    You’re most welcome. Thank you for being here!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Kyah. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you so much. I’m glad your whole family was out when that happened! I can only imagine how scary it must have been for your children to digest all that. (It’s hard enough as an adult…)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Pamela!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    That’s an interesting approach. It does help to imagine that a person didn’t consciously choose to enter my home and take my things. It surprises me that someone can do that without remorse. But I’ve been trying not to think about it!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you so much for sending peace my way. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Yes, I love that quote. It brings me a lot of peace right now!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    I’m glad you’re not in that dangerous neighborhood anymore! It must have been terrifying to know that even people you knew could violate your space in that way.

    I am indeed okay. I’m just glad I still have all my work. I lost some work I did last week, but I redid most of it yesterday. My writing means far more to me than any material possession!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    I think I was just too tired to go through the full range of emotions! I hadn’t slept well the two nights before the break-in, and I didn’t sleep at all that night. Plus, I really felt so grateful for my neighbors. I was just touched beyond words that people went out of their way for me.

    Thanks for the suggestion to check eBay and Craigslist. I’ll give that a try!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    I’m so glad you’ve found the site helpful! I’m not sure if you noticed, but I usually publish a post from a different writer every day. So I didn’t actually write the tunnel post; that one was from a woman named Nikki Di Virgilio.

    It sounds like you’ve been going through a time of great growth and learning. I’m sending you all my love as you continue on that path. Thank you for the well wishes you sent me. I really appreciate your support!

  • Cecilia

    I would say I hope that whoever did that must be in dire need and the he’d used them to good use.  

  • Designred

    I really like your attitude to this invasion of your property.  I too learnt over the years not to attach too much value to “things”.  No-one can ever take from you if you value what is inside your heart.

  • http://www.facebook.com/pamela.picard Pamela Picard

    I’m glad you’re okay, Lori. *phew* Skeery.

  • Tkhudd

    I worked on the north slope in alaska and had to have custom winter gear made, very expensive. When I returned to Anchorage it was stolen from my car. The feeling of violation not a good feeling. On a good note it was all returned by a good person who reminded me we are all leaving here with what we came here with I’m glad you are ok you are loved.

  • shortsmiley1

    Oh my Lori that is so scary and disturbing!  I am so grateful that you weren’t there.  Your spirit is amazing (as usual!) in such a time of turmoil for you.  I will continue to send you good mojo from Colorado! 

  • Lakshmimurali

     Hi Lori,
    So sorry to hear what happened in your apartment. Your attitude and perspective have pulled you through. May you be blessed with good health and love.

    Lakshmi

  • http://www.madlabpost.com/ Nicole/TheMadlabPost

    Lori, what a way to put a useful spin on such a scary weekend. It’s awesome that you are able to tackle this setback with such gratitude for avoiding what could have been and also with such strength to pick up the pieces and put it all back together. It is a lesson in protecting the things that we value while also keeping a good perspective on what we do have (even if we lose those material valuables)…ourselves.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much! That’s wonderful a good person returned it to you. Even when someone tests my faith in people, it helps me to remember many others care.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Michelle! I am indeed alright, and I’m putting this behind me.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Nicole. Experiences like this definitely puts life in perspective. I’m looking forward to my boyfriend coming home tomorrow. He’s definitely on my list of valuables!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you so much for the good mojo!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Pamela. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    I hope so too Cecilia.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Beautifully written. =)

  • Gaiamoonstar

    From a lady who gave away or sold almost everything of monetary value after a very difficult divorce; including loss of home, job, and car, I understand what it must be like to have what few prized possessions you may have be taken from you.I send you my condolences.  I am confidant that you are a not an extravagant gal, and your things meant something. I recently misplaced a journal, which holds bank account numbers, passwords, and correspondence information. Gratefully,  I left it in a car I was interested in purchasing and it will be returned to me on Thursday. Stuff is just that, stuff. We attach too much to things, it’s our safety and peace of mind which matter more in times such as yours. I am so happy you are safe. namaste

  • Guest

    Thank you for sharing Lori.  Your blog has been a constant inspiration to me to look on the bright side of things.  Thankfully, my apartment has not been broken into since I have been here, but during my divorce my home was broken into.  Like you, I was not home when it happened.  I returned at the end of the day from work to find the door busted open.  I was glad that whoever broke in was gone when I arrived home (especially since my kids were with me!) They only took things that belonged to my now ex but it was enough to scare me, that’s for sure.  Now I find when I’m having a rough day and I need a pick me up, I go to your blog and read a post or two and remember exactly what you said here, it could be worse and life is looking pretty good from where I am right now.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank *you* for sharing your story with me. And thank goodness you and your daughters were safe! I’m so glad the site has been helpful to you. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you so much! Some of my things meant something to me, and others were less meaningful. On the whole, I feel okay with what happened. It happened, and it’s over!

  • http://IrvingsJourney.com/ Irving Podolsky

    What an incredible attitude. If you’re ever a Mom, you’ll be great at it.

    Irv

  • Karthik

    This is a better approach. There is less bitterness and negative emotions. For example when there is a large scale destruction due to an earthquake or flooding, the next things to be done are all forward looking and constructive, whereas a terrorist bomb attack has a completely different approach. 

  • Claire

    Lori – I hope you manage to get everything sorted, and I admire you for your acceptance and resilience. Your blog means so much to me, I have got through so much by reading what you write and realising I was not alone in my feelings and foibles. So remember you have an online community across that world that is supporting you right now!

  • Connie

    Thank goodness you are good. Things could have been worse, which is true. I’m glad to know you are well and were able to get proper rest. I actually sat here with my eyes as big as saucers reading your post with my heart racing as I read each word. Thank God you are safe!

    As for the thieves, being a firm believer in Karma, what goes around comes around, it will get them.

    Be Well :)

  • http://optimalternative.com/ Mark B Hoover

    Hard to imagine, isn’t it. I called during Yom Kippur to ask forgiveness for having taken so long. He was quite understanding at the onset. Yet his closing remark about “all your stuff is gone” at the end of the conversation threw me so much it took me two to three months to respond. This is where I find forgiveness and the need to exact right from wrong at odds. It is still an ongoing process. Once a person is wronged to a criminal extent, at what point does he just drop hope and carry on? I know the easy answer to that; it’s in all the books and writings.

  • alexik

    This was awful to hear and it made me sad. What didn’t though, is your attitude. I’m in the midst of dealing with a frustrating situation myself, and I’ve been reminding myself that it could be much, much worse. It may be difficult, but it’s so important to realize this. I hope many good things come your way after this!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you so much. I hope everything is okay with your frustrating situation, and that many good things come your way as well!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Connie! I think these particular thieves have committed many robberies in our neighborhood lately. It will have to catch up with them eventually!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Claire. I’m so glad the site has been helpful to you! I feel that if I still have this sanctuary here, I still have so much to appreciate!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Irving. I can’t wait to be a mother someday!

  • Bret

    God bless you.  You’re reaction is an inspiration  to me.  Thank God you are safe.  Thanks also for your daily thoughts.   I look forward to them.  Take care.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you so much Bret!

  • http://nochnoch.com/ Noch Noch

    oh no! sorry to hear about this – but what amazing attitude you have to negative events!

    Noch Noch

  • http://alidavies.com/ Ali Davies

    Sorry to hear about your horrible experience Lori. Your post highlights that there is always good to be found even in awful times. Things like your neighbours who stepped up to help and support you. What a blessing. And as you role model here, an opportunity to be grateful that things were not any worse. I have a mantra that “when the brown stuff hits the fan, there is always an opportunity lurking in there somewhere.” We just need to be willing to look for it and focus on the postive and keep ourselves from being sucked into the dark side of the situation.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thank you Noch Noch! I appreciate your support. =)

  • Lynda Nguyen

    so while perusing your actual site… i just randomly stumbled upon this post… looking through your ‘change’ section. omg, when was this. it’s not dated. but your recent comments were from a day or so ago. are you okay? can’t wait to see you in june!! -lynda

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    This happened this past Friday, so it’s pretty recently. But I’m okay! I’m looking forward to seeing you in June too! =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Ali. That’s a great mantra. =)

  • http://twitter.com/yourgreatlifetv Bernardo Mendez

    Lori, allowing beauty to be born from a painful situation is part of what makes this life a miracle, right? I’m so grateful you were not in your apartment at the time of the robbery because aside from everything they took wich ultimately is replaceable, your safety and your peace of mind are really what matters. I remember the first time someone stole something from me: I was an 11 year old boy walking back from school (in Mexico City) and a drunk man, bigger and stronger than I was stole a really cool watch that I really loved, I was so scared and so upset.

    A few years later, outside a video store, another man (this one with a gun) stole my wallet and my watch and threw my car keys in a bush (not before making it clear that if I tried to follow him he would kill me). It took my shaking hands more than 30 minutes to find the keys under the rain. I felt so violated and insignificant when these events took place but as I had time to digest what happened two beautiful things emerged. I decided I would move to the US for good and I also learned to really (and I mean REALLY) appreciate the privileged life I’d lived so far. It made me realize that in a country where so many people live in misery, these events are likely to happen. I recalled that many people under similar circumstances in my country had been beaten or even killed.

    The thought that these material possessions might have allowed a family or two to eat or get medical care made the experience way more tolerable in my mind.

    I absolutely love that you’re able to feel grateful for how things worked out as opposed as to how they could have worked out. I’m not surprised by this given that you are such a bright light.

    Sending you lots of love,

    -Bernardo

  • Deborah

    I am sorry to hear of your break-in and soooo glad you are safe.  A robbery is a tough event to shake, so be gentle with yourself if some residual fear may come and go without apparent rhyme or reason.  And p.s. you were wise not to carry your passport with you and keep it in a safe place – we should all take great care with this item.  I enjoy your writing and often find something at Tiny Buddha very nourishing to help me.  Thinking of you, take care

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks Deborah! I think I’ve had some residual fear lately, and I have felt a little on edge in general. I appreciate your advice to be gentle with myself, and I’m so glad the site has been helpful to you. =)

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Hi Bernardo,

    Both of those incidents must have been terrifying! I think it’s
    wonderful that you were able to shift your perspective, both to
    appreciate your life, and also think about who your possessions might
    have helped. You are also a bright light, and I admire you. =)

    Much love,

    Lori

  • http://twitter.com/yourgreatlifetv Bernardo Mendez

    You are too kind. I hope your insurance and all the details of this event unfold effortlessly my friend. <3 -Bern

  • http://zeroto60andbeyond.com Barbara Hammond

    Oh Lori I am so sorry you had to experience this.  I’m glad I get the newsletter or I might have missed this!  I know you believe in karma.  I feel bad for those who felt the need to do this but I know you will be fine.  
    It has been a difficult time for you lately with your surgery and now this. Please take the time to relax and reconnect with what truly matters. Be well. Be safe.
    Love Barbara

  • Angela

    We were robbed twice this week.  It is refreshing to know how different the experience can be when we choose how to respond.  Thank you for this post.  It helped transform my own experience.

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    You’re most welcome Angela. I’m so sorry to learn you’ve been robbed twice. I hope you are doing alright!

  • http://twitter.com/lori_deschene Lori Deschene

    Thanks so much Barbara. I actually had a rough few days this past week (a couple of days after I wrote this) but I am feeling better today. I’m taking some to just relax. I think I really need it! I appreciate your kind words and support, and I hope you’re doing well!

  • http://alidavies.com/ Ali Davies

    Love your comment about how our experience is different when we choose how to respond. I use the mantra “you can’t always choose what happens to you, but you can always choose how you respond.” to keep me anchored in a positon of choice no matter what happens. As you say Angela, it really does impact how we experience things that happen to us.