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Celebrating Six Years Sober: Here’s How I Did It

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“I chose sober because I wanted a better life. I stay sober because I got one.” ~Anonymous

Seven years ago, I never thought I would be able to say that I have been six years sober! I didn’t think I was physically addicted. I never got the shakes, never morning drank, never drank daily unless on vacation, never got a DUI (even though that was lucky), and never lost a job or a relationship because of drinking. I was, however, incredibly emotionally and mentally addicted.

I am fifty-six years old and started drinking in high school. Except when pregnant, I …

The Truth Behind Imposter Syndrome: What It’s Really About

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“We are who we believe we are.” ~C.S. Lewis

Have you ever caught yourself hiding behind the term “imposter syndrome”? I know I have—more times than I’d like to admit.

We hear the phrase so often now, and it’s almost become a catch-all for our fears, doubts, and insecurities. But what if I told you that imposter syndrome isn’t what you think it is? What if it’s something deeper that has been with you far longer than your career or the roles you play in your life?

Let me take you on a journey that may mirror your own. …

How to Ease Pain and Anxiety Through Meditation

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“If nothing changes, nothing changes. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’re going to keep getting what you’re getting. You want change, make some.” ~Courtney C. Stevens

If someone looked at my life when I was younger, they would think that I had it all together. I went to college to obtain my bachelor’s in psychology and social work, followed by my master’s in social work. I have always had good friendships and family relationships. I traveled regularly. I was and still am young and living my life. Little would they know that so much was brewing inside…

The …

Free Download, Living Without Hurry: It’s Time to End the Rush

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Do you ever feel like you’re living your life racing toward someday when everything feels better or easier? Like you’re constantly chasing something—maybe a dream, money, the perfect body, or love and, at the core of it all, happiness?

I chased all these things for years, filling most of my time with activities to attain them, all the while neglecting my deepest needs and ultimately feeling stressed and overwhelmed.

It’s one of life’s greatest ironies—we  push ourselves so hard to find peace and fulfillment in the future without realizing both are available right now if we could only create space …

Let Your Tears Flow: The Proven Benefits of Crying

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“Crying is not a sign of weakness, it’s a courageous expression of emotions that leads to strength.” ~Unknown

When was the last time you cried? Tears are often seen as a sign of weakness, but for me, they are a powerful guide that helps me recognize and understand my feelings. In a society that frequently suppresses emotions, I want to share my journey with tears and encourage you to reflect on your own experiences.

The Change in My Relationship with Tears

Sometimes, I like to cry. During my studies, I hardly ever cried sober and was proud of it. I …

5 Lessons About Change I Learned from Moving to a New City

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“You may not be able to control every situation and its outcome, but you can control how you deal with it.” ~Unknown

I recently moved to Florida, a decision thirty years in the making.

Growing up in Haiti, I always longed to return to a warm climate. I remember being on our layover in Miami when we first moved to the States and thinking, “Why don’t we just stay here?” Moving to Boston at ten, the cold rain was a shock, and I’ve been dreaming of Florida ever since.

Here’s the thing about dreams—they take time, and life sometimes gets …

How to Turn Shame into Self-Love and Emotional Resilience

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“The less we talk about shame, the more control it has over our lives.” ~Brené Brown

The pain and suffering I experienced as a child, which I kept hidden for over a decade, was the very seed that gave me the strength, resilience, empathy, authenticity, and courage that I possess today—but only because I surrendered the old story to embrace a new one. I alchemized my pain into my fuel, my traumas as contributions to my triumphs, and my curses into my greatest blessings.

But all of this came with a very hefty price.

Growing up with a single mother …

Creating Massive Change: How to Get Out of Our Own Way

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Has it ever occurred to you that maybe your life isn’t changing because you’re holding yourself back but don’t know it?

Like maybe there’s something in your conditioning or a subconscious belief that’s preventing you from doing something that could bring you the change you seek?

I’ve been thinking about this a lot since I took Nadia Colburn’s five-day mindful writing challenge because one of the prompts elicited a profound insight about why I’ve struggled to create the change I want most in life.

Part of the prompt was “Don’t go off somewhere else,” and after a brief meditation at …

How to Honor Our Grief While Rebuilding Our Lives

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“Grief is not something that ever goes away. You just learn to accommodate it so you can move forward in your life and over time it gets less intense, at least most of the time.” ~David Baxter

Grief is a natural response to loss. Loss can mean the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, the loss of a job or home, or a response to trauma, abuse, or betrayal. Grief shows itself differently in different people. But the common denominator is that grief goes deep, and grieving is painful.

Around six years ago, my life …

Easily Annoyed by Your Partner? A Relationship-Saving Approach

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“You are not your feelings. You just experience them. Anger, sadness, hate, depression, fear. This is the rain you walk in. But you don’t become the rain. You know the rain will pass. You walk on. And you remember the soft glow of the sun that will come again.” ~Matt Haig

Being a relationship-oriented person all my life, I’ve found it fascinating and frustrating how easy it is to feel annoyed with one’s spouse—the person we are supposed to feel most happy to be around.

I used to feel quite annoyed with my husband on a nearly daily basis. But …

How I Turned My Pain and Anxiety into Personal Growth

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“The only way out is through.” ~Robert Frost

When I reflect on the past fifteen years of my life, I sometimes joke about my struggles to lighten the weight of what I’ve endured. “What struggle don’t I have?” I’d say, laughing, but beneath that humor is a real story of pain, burnout, and learning to rebuild myself, piece by piece.

I faced chronic pain, anxiety, emotional abuse, two burnouts, long COVID, and emotional eating—all before I hit my thirties. It’s been a long journey, and while I still have days where I’m not as happy as I want to …

Free 5-Day Meditation and Writing Challenge

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Hi friends! Today, I’m thrilled to share with you an empowering five-day meditation and writing challenge from Tiny Buddha contributor (and this month’s site sponsor) Nadia Colburn.

Founder of the online creative writing school Align Your Story, Nadia is a poet, memoirist, and yogi who has a talent for helping people access their creative voice on a deeper level. And that’s exactly what she’s done with this challenge.

Each day’s fifteen-minute recording will guide you through a short meditation, share an evocative poem, and lead you through a quick writing exercise inspired by that day’s piece.

When she first told …

How I Created a Beautiful Life on the Other Side of Burnout

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“If you don’t give your mind and body a break, you’ll break. Stop pushing yourself through pain and exhaustion and take care of your needs.” ~Lori Deschene

For forty-five minutes, I lay on my yoga mat in child’s pose, unable to move.

The exhaustion in my body felt like a thousand kilos, and the ache of failure pricked my eyes with tears.

Despite all my early morning runs, after-work bootcamps, and restricted meals, my body did not look like the bikini models I saw on Instagram.

Despite all my energy, efforts, and attention, my romantic relationship had

…

The Consequences of Perfectionism and How to Embrace Life’s Messiness

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“Perfectionism doesn’t make you feel perfect. It makes you feel inadequate.” ~Maria Shriver

My name is Steffi, and I am a recovering perfectionist. This might come as a surprise to those who know me because I don´t fit the stereotype. The inside of my bag is as messy as my hair, and I always give off the impression that I left the house five minutes too late (which is usually true). My wardrobe is not color-coordinated, and I haven’t organized a flawless birthday party yet.

It also goes against how I have always seen myself. My greatest life skill is …

5 Pillars of Mindful Awareness That Transformed My Life

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“When things change inside of you, things change around you.” ~Unknown

When I was twenty-three, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. It was not until two years later, when I stopped taking medication, that I discovered I had a mental health disorder linked to my menstrual cycles.

Meditating daily has been foundational for my well-being. It helps me manage the physical expressions of anxiety and bad moods. It allows me to be more accepting of myself and grateful for the many positives in my life.

But it is the awareness journey that mindfulness has paved over these last …

The Benefits of Vipassana Meditation and How to Start Your Practice

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“Meditation is not a way of making your mind quiet. It’s a way of entering into the quiet that’s already there.” ~Deepak Chopra

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the chaos of daily life, longing for a sense of calm and clarity? That was me a year ago, trapped in a cycle of overwork and unhealthy habits. It wasn’t until I rediscovered meditation, particularly Vipassana, that I began to find true peace and transformation. Here’s my story and how Vipassana changed my life and how it could change yours too.

My Personal Journey with Meditation

I’ve always been drawn …

What I Know About Healing Now That I’ve Ended Contact with My Mom

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“Not all toxic people are cruel and uncaring. Some of them love us dearly. Many of them have good intentions. Most are toxic to our being simply because their needs and way of existing in the world force us to compromise ourselves and our happiness. They aren’t inherently bad people, but they aren’t the right people for us.” ~Daniell Koepke 

If someone had asked me a year ago if I would ever cut contact with my mom, my answer would have been a definite no.

After reconnecting with my dad in 2020 (we didn’t speak for over eleven years), I …

4 Fears That Create People-Pleasers and How to Ease Them

By in Blog, love & relationships

“It feels good to be accepted, loved, and approved of by others, but often the membership fee to belong to that club is far too high of a price to pay.” ~Dennis Merritt Jones

Like a lot of people, I grew up putting others’ needs and wants first. I learned early that doing things for other people and accommodating their wishes gained me attention and approval. It was only in those moments that I felt good enough and deserving of love.

As a child, I liked nothing more than feeling indispensable and being told I was a good and …

The Dangers of Safety and How to Live Fully

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“A ship in a harbor is safe, but that’s not what a ship is built for.” ~John Augustus Shedd

Growing up in the Midwest in a traditional family steeped in Catholic values, safety was paramount. We adhered to conventional roles: father, mother, brother, and sister, with me as the baby sister.

My parents were loving, but my mom parented through a lens of fear, constantly worrying about potential dangers. This fierce protection was a testament to her love, yet it ingrained in me the belief that taking the safe route was the only way to navigate life.

One day, when …

The Importance of Setting Strong, Healthy Boundaries

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“If you love yourself, it doesn’t matter if other people don’t like you because you don’t need their approval to feel good about yourself.” ~Lori Deschene

I spent my whole life trying to please other people. I would put myself through stress and discomfort to fit in with what they wanted or needed. I would rarely feel confident enough to communicate what I wanted because when I did, I would be met with frustration or anger, and I’d often come away feeling stupid.

When I was growing up, I would feel my emotions very strongly, so a lot of …