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5 Pillars of Mindful Awareness That Transformed My Life

“When things change inside of you, things change around you.” ~Unknown

When I was twenty-three, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. It was not until two years later, when I stopped taking medication, that I discovered I had a mental health disorder linked to my menstrual cycles.

Meditating daily has been foundational for my well-being. It helps me manage the physical expressions of anxiety and bad moods. It allows me to be more accepting of myself and grateful for the many positives in my life.

But it is the awareness journey that mindfulness has paved over these last …

The Benefits of Vipassana Meditation and How to Start Your Practice

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“Meditation is not a way of making your mind quiet. It’s a way of entering into the quiet that’s already there.” ~Deepak Chopra

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the chaos of daily life, longing for a sense of calm and clarity? That was me a year ago, trapped in a cycle of overwork and unhealthy habits. It wasn’t until I rediscovered meditation, particularly Vipassana, that I began to find true peace and transformation. Here’s my story and how Vipassana changed my life and how it could change yours too.

My Personal Journey with Meditation

I’ve always been drawn …

What I Know About Healing Now That I’ve Ended Contact with My Mom

“Not all toxic people are cruel and uncaring. Some of them love us dearly. Many of them have good intentions. Most are toxic to our being simply because their needs and way of existing in the world force us to compromise ourselves and our happiness. They aren’t inherently bad people, but they aren’t the right people for us.” ~Daniell Koepke 

If someone had asked me a year ago if I would ever cut contact with my mom, my answer would have been a definite no.

After reconnecting with my dad in 2020 (we didn’t speak for over eleven years), I …

4 Fears That Create People-Pleasers and How to Ease Them

“It feels good to be accepted, loved, and approved of by others, but often the membership fee to belong to that club is far too high of a price to pay.” ~Dennis Merritt Jones

Like a lot of people, I grew up putting others’ needs and wants first. I learned early that doing things for other people and accommodating their wishes gained me attention and approval. It was only in those moments that I felt good enough and deserving of love.

As a child, I liked nothing more than feeling indispensable and being told I was a good and …

The Dangers of Safety and How to Live Fully

“A ship in a harbor is safe, but that’s not what a ship is built for.” ~John Augustus Shedd

Growing up in the Midwest in a traditional family steeped in Catholic values, safety was paramount. We adhered to conventional roles: father, mother, brother, and sister, with me as the baby sister.

My parents were loving, but my mom parented through a lens of fear, constantly worrying about potential dangers. This fierce protection was a testament to her love, yet it ingrained in me the belief that taking the safe route was the only way to navigate life.

One day, when …

The Importance of Setting Strong, Healthy Boundaries

“If you love yourself, it doesn’t matter if other people don’t like you because you don’t need their approval to feel good about yourself.” ~Lori Deschene

I spent my whole life trying to please other people. I would put myself through stress and discomfort to fit in with what they wanted or needed. I would rarely feel confident enough to communicate what I wanted because when I did, I would be met with frustration or anger, and I’d often come away feeling stupid.

When I was growing up, I would feel my emotions very strongly, so a lot of …

What Migraines Have Taught Me About Being Vulnerable

“Vulnerability is the core, the heart, the center, of meaningful human experiences.” ~Brené Brown, Daring Greatly

Migraines. I’ve had them since I was five years old. Sometimes they’re bad, sometimes they’re really bad. But I have them.

When I was five, I had electrodes placed on my skull to do an EEG. I didn’t understand the name, so I called it a “sleepy EG” since they put me to sleep to do it.

Back then, I didn’t realize how chronic pain could interfere with my daily life. I just knew that I was getting my sleepy EG.

It …

Healing from Chronic Fatigue: The Amazing Impact of Self-Compassion

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” ~Dalai Lama

In my mid-thirties, my active and adventuresome life as a broadcast journalist collapsed. It began with a trauma, followed by flu-like symptoms that stuck around for thirteen years. Almost overnight, I lost the pep to walk around the block, much less file reports for the evening news.

A battery of doctors diagnosed me with chronic fatigue syndrome (ME/CFS), among other diagnoses. They said I’d have to live this way since there was no reliable cure. I became one of the …

How I Changed My Life by Becoming a Thought Snob

“Loving people live in a loving world. Hostile people live in a hostile world. Same world. ~Wayne Dyer

Driving home from another visit to the pediatrician, Mother reiterated how puny I was: “You’re just like Mommy. She was so frail. You get sick easily.” I’d say I was five years old when I wholeheartedly accepted this hogwash as fact. I’m not exaggerating when I tell you I stayed sick for three decades because I truly believed I was prone to illness.

I come from a long line of women who never got what they wanted. They settled, conformed, and were …

The Breakthrough That Helped Me Stop Comparing Myself to Others

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” ~Theodore Roosevelt

In March 2020, the UK went into its first Covid lockdown, and the country was swept with anxiety and sadness. When would we see our loved ones again? Would our health be okay? Was my job safe? And more pressingly, how the heck was I expected to teach my kids?

Along with everyone else, I first received the news with a sense of impending doom and tried to make the best of a bizarre situation. “Normal life” consisted of stressful home schooling, online working, mask wearing, and (in the UK at least) …

Shadow Parts: How to Recognize and Release Them

“When we are aware of our weaknesses or negative tendencies, we open the opportunity to work on them.” ~Allan Looks

Last year, I took my then-six-year-old son to a kite festival. He was ecstatic about flying his kites, and we spent a lot of time doing just that!

At one point, his kite string got tangled with another lady’s kite string. Both kites crashed to the ground, and the lady and I started working to untangle the strings.

In his excitement, my little one repeatedly asked if we were done yet and if he could fly his kite again. I …

How to Move Forward After Loss: The 3 Phases of Healing

“Whatever you’re feeling, it will eventually pass. You won’t feel sad forever. At some point, you will feel happy again. You won’t feel anxious forever. In time, you will feel calm again. You don’t have to fight your feelings or feel guilty for having them. You just have to accept them and be good to yourself while you ride this out. Resisting your emotions and shaming yourself will only cause you more pain, and you don’t deserve that. You deserve your own love, acceptance, and compassion.” ~Lori Deschene

To this day, I still remember that call. I had just …

How One Simple Change Transformed My Life

“It’s the small habits. How you spend your mornings. How you talk to yourself. What you read and what you watch. Who you share your energy with. Who has access to you. That will change your life.” ~Michael Tonge

It was a Tuesday morning like any other. The alarm clock mercilessly blared, abruptly ending my peaceful slumber. Groggy and disoriented, I dragged myself out of bed, my mind already racing with the countless tasks that awaited me.

I wearily stumbled down the stairs, desperately yearning for the comfort of my morning coffee. But as the aroma filled the air, I …

5 Lessons Pain Taught Me About Love

“If there is love in your heart, it will guide you through your life. Love has its own intelligence.” ~Sadhguru

Love was something I craved for most of my life. I dreamed that one day, a person would come into my life, preferably a man, who would love me and save me from my painful suffering filled with emptiness and desperation.

Even when I was single, which I was quite often and for prolonged periods, I would fantasize about a perfect relationship with someone who’d understand and accept me even in my worst moments. I wanted a partner and a …

How I Healed from Addiction One New Belief at a Time

“Recovery is all about using our power to change our beliefs that are based on faulty data.” ~Kevin McCormick

I struggled with what I would consider a disconnect with myself from a very young age. I was born a free spirit, curious and interested in so many things. I was also very shy and sensitive. I was not the type to be put in a box or expected to conform to the norm. That just wasn’t me. I needed to be accepted and supported for who I was.

Instead, my well-meaning parents attempted to “domesticate” me, especially my father. I …

What Unconditional Self-Love Looks Like

“Love is the great miracle cure. Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.” ~Louise L. Hay

When I first began painting my art over twenty years ago, it was not my intention to paint about self-love. In fact, at that time, I had no idea what self-love was. I was just painting as a form of therapy.

A few years prior, I thought that I did know what self-love was, but then, when I lost my health to a chronic illness and could no longer do the things I once had been able to do, I lost my ability to …

Beyond the Inner Critic: Choosing a New Reality

“To think new thoughts, you have to break the bones in your head.” ~Jean-Paul Sartre

Respectfully, Mr. Sartre, I disagree. This is that story, and it’s not for the faint of heart.

Today Was a Bad Day

Oh no, not again!

The walls were closing in on me, and I could see their faces all flustered and red.

Why are they yelling at me? I mean, are they yelling at me?

I could feel the tension in the room; I just couldn’t hear anything. Well, actually, yeah, I could.

I could hear her.

I could hear Annabelle.

I knew it …

My Path to Purpose and an Unexpected Impact

I wanted to be Mary Tyler Moore’s “Mary Richards” TV character from the 1970s. She had exactly what I wanted: independence and an exciting life! But growing up as the first girl in a traditional Italian family, I knew she was not the right role model.

Nonetheless, I ignored the expected path (much to my parents’ dismay) and spent twelve years in corporate America becoming Mary. That is, until two questions rocked my world. I dramatically left my job, career, and Mary for a more purposeful path that was mine, and I never looked back.

As a nine-year-old girl in …

6 Mindset Shifts to Overcome the Need for External Validation

“Relying on external validation to understand your worth is not sustainable. If you depend on people to build you up, you also give them the same power to break you down. You are worthy regardless of their opinion.” ~Unknown

In my heart of hearts, I knew I wasn’t supposed to rely on others for validation. Yet, for the longest time, I found myself seeking external approval to define my worth.

I was constantly seeking reassurance from friends, family, and even strangers. Their validation became the measure of my self-esteem, leaving me trapped in a cycle of doubt and insecurity.…

Forge Your Own Path: How to Know When It’s Time to Walk Away

“Walk away from people who put you down. Walk away from fights that will never be resolved. Walk away from trying to please people who will never see your worth. The more you walk away from things that poison your soul, the healthier you will be.” ~Shaista Saba

“Are you coming to my dress fitting tomorrow?” Sam asked.

Holding the phone to my ear, puzzled, I replied, “I didn’t know you had a dress fitting tomorrow.”

My stepsister, Sam, paused. “Didn’t Mom invite you?”

“No, but I’d love to come,” I offered.

“Oh, I assumed she asked you. You’re my …